Controlling Sexualiy?

[Jitendra Hydonus]

While i believe that eventually we must all give up all our earthly attachments to have enlightenment... i have recieved much learning and satisfaction from my sexual life. i have found that control in sexuality can also satisfy a partner when we do engage in sex and it can lead to some fascinating experiences both having it and not. From a spiritual point of view much has been said about it's practice or refrainment of sex from our lives.

i have found that people that most abuse sex are abusive at some level anyhow. Sex is just another expression of that abuse.
When we get to know them there is abuse in other areas as well.

In this tread I would like to explore some of our experiences relating to sexuality, what place it has in spiritual development and what are some methods for it's control? Of course we may have other things to add. i would appreciate your input. While we recently had a thread about masturbation obviously that is only one facet of sex and this human experience that most everyone at some level has an interest in.

Jitendra

[Jitendra Hydonus]

"Conserve your powers. Be like the capacious ocean, absorbing quietly all the tributary rivers of the senses. Daily renewed sense yearnings sap your inner peace; they are like openings in a reservoir that permit vital waters to be wasted in the desert soil of materialism. The forceful, activating impulse of wrong desire is the greatest enemy to the happiness of man. Roam in the world as a lion of self-control; don't let the frogs of sense weakness kick you around." Swami Sri Yukteswar Giri

another helpful resource: http://yoganandaharmony.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/Sex-Force-Transmutation.pdf

Before retiring at nite, wipe with a cold, wet towel all the body openings as well as the hands, feet, armpits, navel, and the back of the neck over the medulla oblongata. Do this regularly.

During times of bodily excitement draw six to fifteen deep breaths and exhale them deeply. Then quickly seek the company of those you respect, persons of self-control. ~ Yogananda

[brock]

Maybe no one can help us figure out what our desires are except ourselves.


For doing this experiment, the technique recommended by Yogananda has been helpful. Also, not looking at provoking material is a big help. Also, the commitment to the thread is the biggest factor. Having others to account to during this process is the difference so far.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I have found a helpful exercise is the running in place exercise Yogananda offers in the energization exercises which also help balance energies in the body.

[brock]

controlling sexualiy?

looks like you got one hand on the keyboard...I don't want to think about the other hand.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

controlling sexualiy?

looks like you got one hand on the keyboard...I don't want to think about the other hand.

yea the other hand is wiping my forhead. But I like you anyhow.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Like the breath, we can also observe our body what it is saying to us. We do not always need as much as we think. We do not need as much food, we do not need as much pleasure, we do not need as much sex. Much of this is out of habit and abuse of habit. When we watch our breath with a mantra the breath slows down. We can also watch our thoughts and bodily reactions. These too can slow down. Even if sexuality takes us over it can be treated much slower. It can even wind down before culminating or it can culminate with less surge. This is a force that usually takes much time to control. There are many different levels of control. This is what has come to me over the years. I still recall memories of physical closeness with others to express love  many were not physical orgasms. They were non the less .... good memories.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

To much sex signifies a grasping personality. One which creates future existances to fulfill such desires. The mind is grasping at erotic visions. In meditation we are practicing letting go of all thought forms.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Paramahansa Yogananda and Sri Yukteswar have told us that certain foods stimulate our sexual nature while other foods have a cooling effect on the body. Avoid or stop eating all meats and fish also, although it is not as bad for you as pork and red meats. Certain foods are more spiritual in nature. For instance bananas give peace and mangoes are the most spiritual of foods.

[brock]

Please check this one out:

http://www.ramdass.org/episode-55-sex-spirituality/

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Please check this one out:

http://www.ramdass.org/episode-55-sex-spirituality/

I did... thanks.

I wanted to add something here. One thing I find very beautiful about unreciprocated love. Once you feel this tremendous feeling of love for another human being and they find someone else your love does not have to die instead it can grow and include others. It is fascinating to me that those who leave others behind and engage in a very personal kind of love with another human being actually can loose their sense of expanding and universal love. In this sense a loss can be a gain and a gain a loss. Such is the nature of duality as it manifests in personal relationships. It is all in how we use this great universal energy as it awakens in our consciousness.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

The less and less we identify with this body we inhabit, the less we are controlled by its functions. How do we disassociate from the body? By withdrawal of the life force and senses while at the same time interiorizing the consciousness. This practice brings identification with soul awareness instead of body identification and consciousness. Use the practice of tecchniques of meditation that work for you.

[brock]

[Jitendra Hydonus]

....and watch out for those wet dreams. They could happen at an unfortunate moment. Gain control now while it's in your hands.No pun intended.

[kingfisher111]

Please check this one out:

http://www.ramdass.org/episode-55-sex-spirituality/

I did... thanks.

I wanted to add something here. One thing I find very beautiful about unreciprocated love. Once you feel this tremendous feeling of love for another human being and they find someone else your love does not have to die instead it can grow and include others. It is fascinating to me that those who leave others behind and engage in a very personal kind of love with another human being actually can loose their sense of expanding and universal love. In this sense a loss can be a gain and a gain a loss. Such is the nature of duality as it manifests in personal relationships. It is all in how we use this great universal energy as it awakens in our consciousness.

Very interesting point Steve.