the silent treatment

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Thanks for this advice above Steve. I find I am being given the silent treatment on multiple fronts, but to those who give it, it's as if it's not happening and there's a "pretend to be something" or "nothing to see here" that I can not pretend when we are face to face. Work, interest and past. Instead I wish my past and my present well and try to respond from Love, even if that means extricating myself out of an uneasy situation. Why pretend? The only reason it would hurt is because we've opened our Hearts up and it is so easily dismissed. I think though on the Masters who have found God and are able to walk in complete realization, that they must be on a receiving end of abuse when others are putting their own barriers up to Gods Love. I will try and maintain the course, which is finding God and resting safely in his Love always. _^_ Peace friend.

Yea I once heard Paramahansa had said that was that the greatest pain Jesus experienced was not being crucified but that his friends left him.

So when I read what you said below I had to think to myself; being too sensitive is not all a ego thing.

“Why pretend? The only reason it would hurt is because we've opened our Hearts up and it is so easily dismissed”

Thanks for your insight Eric. In the next thread I want to elaborate on this connection.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

while seeing amma she made the comment that those who give others the silent treatment and stick their nose up in the air actually have a form of mental illness. sometimes we wonder about ourselves when this treatment is given to us however we should realize that people do practice meanness and this kind of behavior is a result of being so wrapped up in ourselves and our ego that there is only one view; our own.

Jitendra

I have  found that a lot of people give  us the silent treatment in their dealings with friends and people they have known. It is not such a bad thing to bring up here again when we wonder about ourselves when this treatment is given to us. It is important to recognize that some people are so wrapped up in their own ego that there is only one view; their own.

[guest587]

I am learning that when it happens, it's better to recognize the unspoken reality than to try and coerce a desired one. I am so grateful you bumped this thread. Please know what I am saying may not be relatable to your revelations- but that at a later time, it may make sense. There are three sides to every story?

Lately I've had to distance myself from a friend. I called him and left a message, explaining that I do not want to hang out or get together at this time. I told him I wish him well. I did this because I understand the silent treatment is not something I'v enjoyed- so if I am choosing to end a relationship, I will at least try to verbalize. I also realize though, sometimes that doesn't always work. And people want to argue about who'se view is the correct one. Rather than get into who is right or wrong, it's better to walk away- but to maintain the course with our own ideals. Practicing good charity and kindness.

I left this friendship because I felt like there was years of toxic behavior that did not align with my personal beliefs. I saw an alpha personality dominating my own and it was not something I enjoyed. I wish my friend peace, and I wish to live my life free from his influence.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I am learning that when it happens, it's better to recognize the unspoken reality than to try and coerce a desired one. I am so grateful you bumped this thread. Please know what I am saying may not be relatable to your revelations- but that at a later time, it may make sense. There are three sides to every story?

Lately I've had to distance myself from a friend. I called him and left a message, explaining that I do not want to hang out or get together at this time. I told him I wish him well. I did this because I understand the silent treatment is not something I'v enjoyed- so if I am choosing to end a relationship, I will at least try to verbalize. I also realize though, sometimes that doesn't always work. And people want to argue about who'se view is the correct one. Rather than get into who is right or wrong, it's better to walk away- but to maintain the course with our own ideals. Practicing good charity and kindness.

I left this friendship because I felt like there was years of toxic behavior that did not align with my personal beliefs. I saw an alpha personality dominating my own and it was not something I enjoyed. I wish my friend peace, and I wish to live my life free from his influence.

Thanks Eric and I most likely will return here at a later date. I have witnessed people want to argue or may be on an anger or tantrum trajectory that is difficult to shake. It is best to just let them spout out or if you know they will most likely calm down …talk to them then. There are as many ways as there are people for the way relationships dissipate and our approach is, and response will always be, a factor for our spiritual development. If we didn’t ‘pass’ the test my experience is that it will reoccur in another guise. Some of us have specifically asked that our lives be guided by a Master. So this will be just another lesson in our development.

The alpha personality dominating factor you mention here may easily be a topic for another thread since it involves so many factors. Everyone has a reason of there own for giving others the silence treatment and personality conflicts are probably the most common of all of them. Although this is a factor I have realized in others not attempting to change themselves; they may often see you in a subordinate or inferior position and may never have the ability to see the relationship in any other way. Sometimes we must leave others in their own self circumscribed boxes if we no longer can fit their descriptions. It is important to recognize that people try to put us in their own groupings because of their own mindsets and prejudices.