Keeping Open to the Needs of Others

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I have found by keeping open to the needs of others around me (not people on the internet I’ve never met or talked with) I am provided for my needs. I think it is important to recognize we may have our needs taken care of but not our desires. Desires often lead to more trouble than they are worth. This doesn’t mean we don’t seek them anyhow. It is important to separate needs from desires. Warren Buffet was asked why he doesn’t have a large house and a yacht that is usually seen in wealthy people. His response was a jewel of wisdom; “I don’t need the troubles.”

[guest587]

I am learning about doubt and patience.

As an individual, here to learn- I choose and cocreate with God.

With regards to relationships. Do I want to condemn others who behave to situations differently than me?

If I believe they have a good Heart- should I carry anger, hatred or doubt the other when they do not reciprocate?

No. I believe I have a choice. I choose to practice patience and cast doubt aside. And whatever happens, I can always work on the feelings moving within my self as a way to create peace.

Perhaps the relationship is changed, and we are carried elsewhere in a environment more suited to our temperament. This is fine too. The idea is, should circumstance mean I encounter someone from a previous relationship- how do I want to treat them? What feelings do I carry inside of me?

Perhaps methods for resolving issues are different, and others can not rise to the occasion as we would hope. But it does not mean I wish to carry the energy of doubt, condemnation or contempt for others. And perhaps in this way, patience allows the needs of others to be met.

We may not always be able to practice these things in the moment. But in any moment, we can choose. And, as spiritual seekers- we recognize the refinement of Ego can mean the clashing of personalities.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I do not think people always know or imagine how much those around us are open to the needs of others. How can for instance Amma help everyone asking for her physical help? She is taking care of the needs of those experiencing disaster all over the world. So when I hear someone say they think she should learn the language of English before coming here I also laugh. She does so much to help the American people. Should she take more time out of the day to learn our language also? Perhaps she should learn Italian also when coming to Italy and German when going to Germany. For me it is most important to learn spirituality and such interests of others to talk on the phone, listen to their movies and music or listen to their problems must come secondary. As much as I believe Amma cares about me, it would be quite an expectation to think she should call me on the phone.

[guest587]

Right? Unless of course you two were close friends where such a thing was a normal part of your exchange- I never heard anyone say Amma should learn English- but there are probably plenty of people that say, "So and so should do such and such." It doesn't mean they know better. LOL

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Right? Unless of course you two were close friends where such a thing was a normal part of your exchange- I never heard anyone say Amma should learn English- but there are probably plenty of people that say, "So and so should do such and such." It doesn't mean they know better. LOL

Yes and people have different approaches Eric. At times I find it better to withdraw from confrontation even though someone else may want to ‘ram on’. It gives time and energy to understand ourselves better before making mistakes that could cost a valuable friendship. I’ve witnessed it before. Challenging words and unkindness sometimes are unproductive. It may not appear that way to one of the parties involved. But you really can never take back the words you say to others once they’ve been expressed. We can forgive but it is not that easy to forget. There is always that thought; when is the next onslaught? Sometimes with best friends they too need space, to reflect and spiritualize their understanding. It is not always ‘avoidance’ as you stated before but rather a time to reflect, perhaps cool down and definitely a time to relax our hold on fortified boundaries that keep each other off of forbidden territory…. those marshlands and swamps that can entangle you with seaweed and quicksand; muck, which there may be no way to rescue 🛟 us from. Better to build a bridge over time that can withstand such conditions.

[guest587]

I agree, and I respect that. Communication is key, even if it means saying: I need a little space right now. Whether with friends, family or your significant other-  sometimes leaving one party to figure it out can create unnecessary drama. If your friends really care to maintain the relationship, boundaries are usually respected. I appreciate you! 

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Right? Unless of course you two were close friends where such a thing was a normal part of your exchange- I never heard anyone say Amma should learn English- but there are probably plenty of people that say, "So and so should do such and such." It doesn't mean they know better. LOL

The challenges arise when even as close friends we find that nothing remains the same here on the earth plain. Even people reveal facets of behavior we are not accustomed to as we are also surrounded by changing conditions around us.

We also find that the needs of others who come into our sphere keep us from visiting those we have at one time seen on a more regular basis. We must be willing to also be more adaptive to changing conditions around us. What was true and standard conditions for a relationship can change dramatically because of changing circumstances and we are not able to always explain all the vicissitudes of life’s circumstances in a timely or excepted way to friends and acquaintances around us.  They may be used to a previous relationship and conditions.

I understand that a simple thing like a phone conversation is not an unrealistic option. The challenge comes when there is a desire to speak with several people we have not contacted in some time. And then some of them recognize we have copied and pasted some personal messages and that is not a legitimate form of communication for them. Last nite I was reminded by a friend that I had not contacted a monk I haven’t talked to in a long time. I recognized that I lost contact with another monk who was a friend because I haven’t spoken with him in a long time. I explained that it was hard to communicate with everyone and my friend explained the importance of talking to certain people. We at times have difficulty just knowing what contacts to make when are most important contact is with God and Guru. I am beginning to recognize that communication itself evolves, as we evolve.

I recently reached out to a couple of friends living together and they eventually got back to me and said they were very busy with work schedules. I was satisfied with that explanation and know that God opens up many doors along the way. I do not have to worry about which one and when another will open.

People enjoy personal rapport. And I am one of them. Why would it be any different with our relationship with God? We attempt to communicate with spirit constantly. Do we get the communication back we desire?

[fisherking1111]

😌💜🙏

[Jitendra Hydonus]

😌💜🙏

Art; thanks for keepin the energy goin…. I’m occupied with some intense service, practicing being a guardian Angel; when I haven’t a clue. I’m not accustomed to play such roles. It may take quite a lot of practice. But I long for my wings to fly. At least you arrived to help me understand what is happening; when I see many things fade behind…..just then…..another door opens. May all arms be open and all people be free.