Message #43513

[guest587]

Thanks Steve. I agree.

My Sister and I got into it again. She moved back in and brought her troubles with her. She started a fight with me one morning and it went from ugly to worse. After being antagonized I pushed her away form me and yelled leave me alone. No one behaved correctly. Now she's moving out, and for a while I felt she was trying to blame me. She gives me the cold shoulder in person but ask me for favors over the phone if it means providing for her. She isn't asking for money, she's just asking for healthy food. What's a Brother supposed to do? I don't think she's trying to take advantage. And I don't think she means ill, even though she can be quite vindictive and methodical in her reproach.

It has gotten to the point where I pray to God to be free from toxic thoughts, even while others carry on in harboring their own. I had to tell her this morning I am no longer her emotional hostage. I believe I've been taking on a lot of the emotional baggage without either of us realizing to what extent, as she tends to prioritize the atmosphere to revolve around her drama. I think if we're going to live together, boundaries need to be respected. But if she believes moving out is best, that's okay too.

You've said it best, we shouldn't be responsible for the karma or ego problems of others. Only our own. And damn I am put through the ringer. A Cancer and a Taurus on the family level can be quite a nasty mix let me tell you.

But it's okay... Because she does have a lot of Love... And I think we're moving through this. Even if it's not at my desired pace. Which I think is teaching me something about patience and learning how to appropriately administer my own energies as cocreator. Sorry for sharing such personal affairs publicly... You said I speak in vague generalities- it's funny, sometimes I feel the same about you. So I tried speaking more directly... And if people find parallels then all the better.

I really think there's a lot of shaking up happening with everyone's Ego's during this time. Yes... We are blessed to have received spiritual disciplines and wisdoms in this lifetime. And I hope I am able to exercise them correctly and not feel the need to make a point.

Sometimes choosing Love means letting go and allowing others to go through their drama, free of our ideas about it. And we should let go lest we wish to fester alongside and become emotionally hijacked.