Message #40593

[guest587]

1/6/23- Wolf Moon Journal

Yesterday I woke up with sensations of restlessness prodding me at the thought level. I reminded my self, there's no rush or need to get anything done.
This was helpful. It became apparent taking my time was beneficial. It felt like a dance. I would feel this, "urge" to get something done faster- than I would remind my self... And instead enjoy the moment. It started that way at the coffee shop as I took care of finances and mixed in leisure time.

It even went that way with exercise- where throughout the routine I felt moments of wanting to "speed" up and instead forced my self to slow down. This made the nature walk aspect of my workout all the more appreciative.

I used some money I had been saving for a massage and it was nice but not necessary. When I had first woke up to start my day, my "shower thoughts" told me not to bother going to the massage. I can see why I was cautioning my self now, after the fact. They're expensive.

Later in the night I was hit with another urge and craving to satisfy... I wanted dark chocolate and bad. I rushed to the store and loaded my basket with cherries and various dark chocolates.

I did not beat my self up for caving in to the urges... I just observed. Realized satisfying them was not necessary. But also found that going through the motions was helpful in solidifying various solutions with regards to restlesness.

After all that and the full moon now visible I went outside to meditate. Meditation was very calm and very deep. All restless activity had ceased, which does not always happen in meditation. I was grateful, it was like a balm. I started to think Yogananda would suggest that if we are feeling restless we should meditate doubly so. I wondered if Steve was meditating with me at one point since I suggested it here.

Meditation was a salve for the excitable state which tried probing my consciousness- and I believe, noticing now a theme made apparent through out the day, it could be in part to the full moon energies. There were equal parts excitability and equal parts calming energy- the full moon brought about a window of observation and a dancing between the two energies which provided grateful insight and resolution.

I hope to share again here Feb. 5th. and see if there is a theme to be found and meditate under the full moon once more.