Greetings Steve,
What you are speaking of is a tricky question to answer as you have broke off into suffering. I understand what you are saying that if you are having something bad happen to you one should take their mind out of it, and think of a happy time, or goto their happy place. That does not change the current situation, as much as you think about being somewhere else. That doesn't change the fact that you are sitting there in a terrible opportunity.
Suffering happens when you start to live out of the now. When you start to repeat that said situation in your head, and feel that it's gonna happen again. If we focus on those thoughts every time we step out, we will stop living our lives in happiness. We will become fearful, and in some rare cases we will start to dread ever leaving our house. When you expect it to happen again, or to not be fine you will start creating suffering. Being in the bad event isn't the suffering. Reliving it is the suffering.
If one is being raped, yes it's not a pleasant experience, and I understand why one would rather not be in that moment, and be somewhere else.
But when they focus somewhere else that moment is still happening. There is nothing than can do to change that fact. What happens in that moment is up to them.
I find that several of your points are very good. Example: ' Suffering happens when you start to live out of the now. When you start to repeat that said situation in your head, and feel that it's gonna happen again.' However i would not concur that suffering results in living out of the now at all times since sometimes suffering is a result of the now. There is an interesting study it is called theodicy. Theodicy is a specific branch of theology and philosophy that attempts to justify the behaviour of God. Theodicy may also be described as an attempt to reconcile belief in God with the perceived existence of evil and suffering. You state that 'being in the bad event is not the suffering'. Tell this to someone that is being shot at this moment.
Steve Hydonus
