Message #7144

[Jitendra Hydonus]

in regards to personal transformation, how do you keep yourself focused? to wake up each day in awareness of fulfilling the highest goal you've set out for yourself? what are some methods to constantly remind us? sometimes i seek change and fall back on habitual ego based actions... i am a bit disappointed for steering away from the understanding and closeness i've once had. it WAS like an opportunity to get my feet wet and experience the wonders of what this transformation will bring. somewhere though, through out all this- i fell back on older life patterns that leave me unsatisfied and craving more. it feels like my words and actions have even regressed and this is most unsatisfying. i shouldn't be too upset, as there is a valuable lesson in all this. even in my darkest times i remember sharing and acting off the smallest hints of love, but after having some time to reflect... when i was vegetarian, when i was meditating daily, working with dreams, i remember having an increased awareness with self. i remember being genuinely interested in what it is my neighbor had to say and found i could provide insight easier, with grace. there was increased sensitivity and clarity and i'm amazed i hadn't held this as close as i do now. i am working on drawing these aspects of light back into my life. i want to carry warmth, peace, depth, gratitude, and love with me wherever i go. so, how do you keep your eyes on the prize and not get caught up in worldly affairs? WOW! i JUST saw a hawk- awesome lol. but yeah back to the post... so... the whole reason i slipped back into this old lifestyle was a thing of acceptance. i was trying to eat meat when my friends offered or drink/smoke socially with others. i thought, if i'm here with them- it doesn't matter what i'm doing, good work is being done. but as time progressed i later questioned my motifs, am i doing this because i genuinely wish to serve or am i doing it because i want to satisfy perverted desires? it feels like this goal is going to take more then a life time to achieve. how do we shed ourselves from feeling as if we belong to our older thought patterns? how do we become the lighthearted yogi? i want to do without the things in my past that i feel have and still hinder me from feeling like i'm the divine being i know i am.
thanks for any help

i really like this saying,
in love and divine friendship
peace friends

"A swan is always in water, but it is not soaked by the water; it just rests on top of it. Be like a divine swan; be in this world, but not of it. Elevate yourself, and love the entire universe as yourself. This is the highest peak of spirituality."  Sri Karunamyi

i wonder if you have other like minded souls where you live in Texas? It is easy to have 'friends' if we show some kindness to others. You are beyond that Eric. You need to have friends that reflect your highest interests. Do you like living in Texas? May i ask where you are? What city? Environment is stronger then will power until we are anchored in the spiritual life. i have deceived my higher self in my choice of associates. That is the only reason that i am suggesting this to you. It is sometimes bitter experience that sends us crying back to God. But when the awareness comes that we have gone down a dead end road our ability to find our path is stronger as a result of efforts made 'before the fall'.

'Out of this creation, the object that relieves us of our miseries and doubts and administers peace to us, whether animate or inanimate, and however insignificant the same may be, is entitled to our utmost respect. Even if it is regarded by others as an object of vilest contempt, it should be accepted as Sat (Savior) and its company as Godlike. That which produces opposite results, destroying our peace, throwing us into doubt, and creating our miseries, should be considered Asat, the bane of all good, and should be avoided as such.....

Those who remove our troubles, dispel our doubts, and bestow peace are true teachers. They perform a Godlike work, Their opposites (those who increase our doubts and difficulties) are harmful to us and should be avoided like a poison.'

Sri Yuktewar~The Holy Science


Jitendra