Message #38548

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Eric; I always read and to the best of my ability, attempted to understand your feelings in regards to the long time we have attempted to grow together spiritually speaking. People do come to a standstill or impasse in relationships at times and it is something I just express prayer with and as in meditation; continue to witness and observe while being patient with circumstances. Sometimes there is no immediate resolution to peoples differences. This is a phenomenon that I’ve discovered. I do not feel compelled or as though I am forcing issues on anyone. Right or wrong I may express my views that come in conflict with others. Yes someone may find they do not care to hear them or that they are somehow being forced to accept them. But if I have a different explanation does that make me wrong?

Regarding mccoy’s observations, I wonder about what he calls ‘yielding to the lures of sex.’ I think most of us have done that and yes that too is an expression of ego. Yet Paramahansa Yogananda expressed balance in such matters; not suppression. At times I discovered, from being around monastics, many leave the monastery over such matters. Sometimes willingly and at other times by request. Monastic demands are not for everyone. Sometimes it takes awhile for others to recognize this. Fortunately for me I did not choose to be a monastic this life time. I did not see that I was fit for that lifestyle.

Blame expressed by others , in my values is also a form of ego, yet at times we may express our values and they can be perceived as blame or needed discrimination on such matters. In such situations we often do not find resolution but rather two opposing views. In these matters I have found that people often lash out at one another. This too can be a form of ego. As Sri Yukteswar said ; ‘Anger is the manifestation of thwarted desires.’ So at times because of differences in values we are faced with not just the differences but rather our reactions to those differences being the spiritual test we have encountered.