Message #40700

[guest587]

Hi Steve. I tend to agree, and feel equally strange when I see fish confined to such small tanks.

Thanks for taking an interest. I think I will share last nights dreams, which might provide more of an understanding with why I am focused on the alligator and discussing unspoken energies shared between two people.

tapping into unresolved emotions?
i come home to find the back door has been left partially opened by dad. i try to take a photo and show him because i was worried the dogs could have escaped and roamed the streets. the sun was setting and coming out from the door. it was beautiful.
after i am transported to somewhere...
i am being told to avoid the meningitis shot. it's being brought into discussion somehow... perhaps two females are impressing this idea on me. avoid the meningitis shot. there's a great emphasis on this, updated information coming out?
i run into my ex brenda. she is drunk and being very expressive with her emotions. she is telling me how happy she was to have learned something while dating this middle eastern man. shes wondering who i've been with since we've been apart. it seems she is solely focused on her self. she tells me she decided she changed her mind about me, and throws her self on me. i am not so receptive, my reluctance is detected by her. she has two roommates. one is there witnessing her advances on me. the idea is there is sexual energy happening all around me. the roommate is touching themselves and brenda is wanting to engage sexually in front of others. instead i am crying internally as we are hugging. really surreal i see white light as tears in my minds eye(blackness or nothingness). she can feel these emotions. i don't wish to engage her drunken behavior, realizing i have very little say in this relationship. realizing i am actually quite slow to open up. the roomate leaves. i am staying the night, and brenda is trying to get something out of me. instead she ends up passing out. i tuck her in bed. there is some feeling here, somewhere in between all this about her work and law. i suppose she is still a lawyer.
the third roommate enters and wonders who i am. she is at first a little aggressive. i find out she works at the highschool i used to go to. it turns out she is a year younger than me and also went to the same HS. she's in her 30's now. there is only a little time spent here...
again there is something about the sunlight i start to find captivating, like it is transporting me to the next dream sequence...
before this happens the roommate in her 30's tells me...
she says sri lanka is flooding. all this flooding is good news because its bringing questionable characters together. she was implying that we are all very strange characters and being forced together by our environment.
when she says that i am in a partially flooded house. there is an asian woman and husband here. the woman comes out and realizes everything around me is flooding. i quickly swim to her because there is a giant and menacing alligator headed towards us. it even lets out a slow creaking growl. i pull my self out of the water and alert her to the alligators presence. we are trying to find highground, it seems the house is crumbling and sinking in the water. we take refuge on a dilapidated chimney. its churning out smoke and vibrating underneath us. for some reason its like we're on a ride because the chimney is not stationary... and it actually brings us at one point to the alligator. this alligator is huge. not larger than life, but very big and intimidating. it has yellow slits for eyes and you can feel its anger.
i wake up, its 4 am...

i think this dream has a lot to do with facing some unresolved emotions. theres been a theme of talking to different females from my past- someone whispering in my ear over the last couple of nights... a lot of sexual energy too.

i think the house further represents emotions and the sad state of affairs being something faced with another person, with outside forces creating the momentum to confront whatever it is needing confronted.

really interesting emphasis on meningitis and the flooding of sri lanka- flooding happening everywhere... and somehow it being a good thing. she mentioned that entire landmasses are being covered in water.

back to sleep

continued dreaming,
disturbing visions.

i went back to sleep and dreamt of my friend javier being forced to babysit and teach this child required curriculum with the woman demanding her unrealistic expectations be met. she basically wanted the child to do 4, 5 or 6 different things in a confined amount of time. it isn't enough time to learn anything.
i am helping javier by watching what is happening and suggesting we focus on the drawing aspect of the curriculum. we ask the child to draw, he is trying to draw the complete image on two separate pieces of paper, and we have to ask him to redraw it to fit on one. he draws a very good bat(the animal).

later i see my friends mom, tracy. except, her eyes are opened wide and lifeless. i am trying to stare into her eyes to see further. one of her eyes starts moving and looks at mine, only to start moving around on its own again. i am becoming confused and keep staring into the one somewhat life filled eye to understand why i cant see or feel her. finally i ask whats happening and i am being shown three people. one woman is holding her down while another man is raping her. there is a man off to the side slapping her with his penis saying, "keel! keel! keel!" over and over- until the other man climaxes inside her. i see her crying and distraught. the woman explains to me she has been poisoned and is dying a slow and agonizing death.
i wake up very groggy and concerned for my friends mom...