in regards to personal transformation, how do you keep yourself focused? to wake up each day in awareness of fulfilling the highest goal you've set out for yourself? what are some methods to constantly remind us? sometimes i seek change and fall back on habitual ego based actions... i am a bit disappointed for steering away from the understanding and closeness i've once had. it WAS like an opportunity to get my feet wet and experience the wonders of what this transformation will bring. somewhere though, through out all this- i fell back on older life patterns that leave me unsatisfied and craving more. it feels like my words and actions have even regressed and this is most unsatisfying. i shouldn't be too upset, as there is a valuable lesson in all this. even in my darkest times i remember sharing and acting off the smallest hints of love, but after having some time to reflect... when i was vegetarian, when i was meditating daily, working with dreams, i remember having an increased awareness with self. i remember being genuinely interested in what it is my neighbor had to say and found i could provide insight easier, with grace. there was increased sensitivity and clarity and i'm amazed i hadn't held this as close as i do now. i am working on drawing these aspects of light back into my life. i want to carry warmth, peace, depth, gratitude, and love with me wherever i go. so, how do you keep your eyes on the prize and not get caught up in worldly affairs? WOW! i JUST saw a hawk- awesome lol. but yeah back to the post... so... the whole reason i slipped back into this old lifestyle was a thing of acceptance. i was trying to eat meat when my friends offered or drink/smoke socially with others. i thought, if i'm here with them- it doesn't matter what i'm doing, good work is being done. but as time progressed i later questioned my motifs, am i doing this because i genuinely wish to serve or am i doing it because i want to satisfy perverted desires? it feels like this goal is going to take more then a life time to achieve. how do we shed ourselves from feeling as if we belong to our older thought patterns? how do we become the lighthearted yogi? i want to do without the things in my past that i feel have and still hinder me from feeling like i'm the divine being i know i am.
thanks for any help
i really like this saying,
in love and divine friendship
peace friends
