Message #23537

[Beatrice Landcaster]

How ya'all hereabouts been? I'm just goinna cut through the shit and get to the point. I mean to tell you I don't know if our cray fish up the creek our full of protein or plaster but I've been living on them and hickory nuts since Old Hikory defended the south. I mean to tell you my skin is tougher then leather and seeins to how I look now I am goina outlive ya'all but I can'ta tell you if I'm a offshoot of one of those Tortoises ya'all see live 300 years or not. You just come over to grandma Landcaster's place and I will open up a an old cask and ya'll will have Beadies best that will let ya'all out live the aligators in the pond. As long as ya'all don't mind lookin' and behavin' like one. Smoke a little corn husk and drink a little of my cell tonic and ya got a long life ahead of ya young whippersnappers.

                                                                Beatrice Landcaster