Recently I went without meditating for a while and as a result noticed the restlessness in my mind. One morning I wanted to do so many things at once because I was looking too far ahead and imagining what pleasures I might expect from various, fixed activities with others- I was in an extremely irritable state for being so far reaching and the plans I ended up making were to many. Immediate gratification caught me blindsided which caused my impulsive nature to run rampant and impart suffering on myself and worse, on others. Fool I am, when the answer is obvious. Things aren't as bad as they seem, forgiveness and sincerity are transcendental but the chaos in the mind needed settling- I have since applied some meditation but often feel the pangs of that restless nature looking to escape- if given the time and energy, that chaotic feeling begins to leak forth. My question here is, for those who have made meditation a regular practice- do you think you've conquered your restless nature? Am I just becoming more aware of the consequences of not meditating?
If you do not notice it immediately in your own mind you will notice in the minds of others you spend time with that do not meditate. Their minds are in constant turmoil over one thing or another and it is difficult to not be separated from their vibrations unless you consciously take a moment to extract yourself from them and find your own peace again.
It can be seen in the inability to not let go of the past and constant insecurities, addictions to the ups and downs of pleasures, a fight or flight conflict, controlling tendencies, all about me syndrome, OCD tendencies, defensive attitudes, reactions from addictions... and the list is endless. Without some introspection and peace from Prayer or meditation the mind is at constant battle with the world and others and most importantly with ourselves; that’s where it all starts.
