Each soul is utterly unique, no? I mention this because what might seem like misguided activity to one may not seem – or even be - misguided to another; it may actually be a necessary part of one’s spiritual evolution to experience what and who they do, and when – and within which circumstances. It seems to me that friends are simply friends; you feel them, you celebrate them – you enjoy their company when they are there, and miss them when they are gone – but one does not weigh and measure the intent of a friend, or analyze their life – or have expectations, etc. Sometimes old (soul) friends appear when we need a little support. Sometimes they come when we need a push in the tush, and they look more like an enemy than a friend. Sometimes no matter how great the desire, there is no friend to be felt. All of this is as it is, and I trust there is a good reason behind it. Time is also a very funny thing. We use words like ‘current’ and ‘aspiring’ which both imply a sense of time and movement, but really…. we are who we are, and a friend is a friend is a friend. Does this make any sense? It isn’t what we do that connects us so much as who we are.
Example. While in France I met a lady – a wonderful, wonderful lady – and we quite quickly became friends despite generational, linguistic, religious and cultural differences. I use the word ‘became’ in the earthly sense, meaning we had no prior knowledge of each other, on the surface had little in common, and yet, there was a feeling of family between us instantly. Why? Because we did not ‘become’ friends. We were friends already. I did not ‘let’ her in my life – she was just suddenly in it! Who knows why? Maybe she felt my need for support. Maybe God wanted us to have a little fun. Maybe she needed something I was able to give. I feel very blessed that I was allowed to recognize her and be flooded with all the warmth that comes with such. But! I will likely not see her again on earth. We may write on occasion, but communication often wanes. Do I love her less? No way! Do I rearrange my entire life to spend more time with her? No! Not practical! But, a friend is a friend is a friend and I shall love her always – locked in to keep. True friends are gifts. You cannot go out and just choose yourself a gift – it has to be given – and also accepted. We can present ourselves as gifts when the feeling moves us, but… there is no guarantee the other is in a place where they can or want to accept. It does not make them less of a friend. It makes them just like you – on a particular path.
Another example; my husband of these past 22 years is also a friend. In the same manner, we had little on the surface in common when we met. We embarked on a life adventure anyway – because there was that deep, unmistaken soul recognition. We made mistakes! We did some things well. We laughed, we yelled, we cried and we were silent, too. That marriage is over. But! A friend is a friend is a friend. Perhaps I could have spent those decades in a cave, or in a convent – or some kind of spiritual retreat, or seeking a mate whose aspirations exactly met mine - but that is not what I needed for growth. Where would the challenge be in that? I needed to experience tangible, messy, beautiful life. I got what I needed in the material sense (lessons learned through being a wife, mother, partner, etc.) and thank God, I still got what I needed on the spiritual plane (to play out some earthly roles with a real friend.)
Now I am rambling, and I feel I’ve reached the limit on how many times a person can use the word ‘friend’ and still be credible. Lol. Just some thoughts your post brought to mind. Thank you for reaching out and sharing your thoughts, too. S.
