State of Wonder

[Jitendra Hydonus]

Often we are learning together and comparing notes. mccoy.. Your reflections bring me back to times i have also felt women were hyper - sensitive and acted out situations that were a result of their own ego  not necessarily warranting the responses they gave which apparently came from something i did or said. I think the problem for us as men is that even if we are rite; If a woman is convinced otherwise,  we still run the risk of losing them permanantly or offending them. So in this sense our antenna always needs to be in tune with a channel and frequency that is far from reason and logic. Perhaps the answer lies somewhere in the middle - being receptive  and listening yet recognizing that like us - they too are learning about the world we live in. We're in this thing together separated by sex for some kind of balancing act that is part of the design the Lord created for us in these bodies with different gender lessons.  I've always tried keeping this in mind that there is little to gain  by being right when someone else has felt wronged.

[Swami Peevananda]

I find that women are often right. They understand the earth more, where men are more interested in the "rules of the game" and abstractions. Men keep their heads in the clouds more. Women don't give a damn about your rules. Women realize that rules are only a means not an end. It doesn't matter if you do everything "right" with a women. It only matters how real your heart is, how honest your feelings with them are. If you are putting on, they always know.

http://www.amazon.com/In-Different-Voice-Psychological-Development/dp/B0025J3YDY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1407943245&sr=8-1&keywords=in+a+different+voice

In this book, she points out the differences between the games little girls play from little boys. Little girls games are always relationship based, with changeable rules. Mens games always have strictly defined rules and referees. For women, rules only serve to nurture the relationship aspect and connections between individuals. For boys, rules are absolutes that are unbendable.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I find that women are often right. They understand the earth more, where men are more interested in the "rules of the game" and abstractions. Men keep their heads in the clouds more. Women don't give a damn about your rules. Women realize that rules are only a means not an end. It doesn't matter if you do everything "right" with a women. It only matters how real your heart is, how honest your feelings with them are. If you are putting on, they always know.

http://www.amazon.com/In-Different-Voice-Psychological-Development/dp/B0025J3YDY/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1407943245&sr=8-1&keywords=in+a+different+voice

In this book, she points out the differences between the games little girls play from little boys. Little girls games are always relationship based, with changeable rules. Mens games always have strictly defined rules and referees. For women, rules only serve to nurture the relationship aspect and connections between individuals. For boys, rules are absolutes that are unbendable.

Sometimes rules can be compassionate. I have a rule for myself: i will always speak to someone and be friendly. In my experience men usually remain friends longer. Not saying this is true for everyone. Just my experience. It would be more difficult for you to make that observation since you are much younger swami. I have found that for instance endurance and length of friendship and love are good rules to play by for myself. As you say perhaps it is true women do not go by rules as much but this can also make people fickle and not dependable for any length of time. Look at how many females that are members here... they were supportive at one time.

Comet is an exception she has been here through everything beautifying spiritual portal. Most people do things out of convienence and fad. Take for instance Facebook or Walmart. Most people do not think of the ethical considerations.
They do things because it is popular to do.... not even considering the ultimate outcome for themselves and others.
There is no real 'heart' in all this. It is opportunist convienience. It would be nice to see some character in ourselves.

Can't answer the idea 'if you are putting on they will know' because I do not recall putting on so I could find out. I believe my mother was best at seeing thru that charade. Had a couple psychic girl friends but I was honest with them so never had to find out if they could see thru any deceptions.

I believe it is good to have your head up high in the clouds as long as your feet are on strong footing. The Master's are helping us keep our feet welll placed on the earth.

I have found women generally speaking are more supportive then men but if you cross them or somehow offend them watch out! You may not get a second chance. Men don't seem to take it soooo sensitively.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

I understand some of what you are saying about women. If they are at a distance it may be better to to text them rather than talk on the phone where they can say you are insensitive and they claim they can hear it in your voice. Because if they are making it up you can ask them what you said in the message that was insensitive without resorting to the frequency of your voice and subjective observations on their part.

That's exactly one fo the aspects of hypersensitivity= wanting to find something in a nuance which actually correlates to no relevant thoughts behind the speech.

Speaking of phone calls, you reminded me of a couple of funny  examples:
1) I had a phone conversation with a mutual friend, while my wife was listening. Then she asked what he told me, and I complied Then, not satisfied with my answer, she asked me in what tone he told me that. I answered that I didn't carry out a Fourier analysis of his speech pattern so I couldn't say exactly. Fourier analysis is one of the most popular ways in engineering to analyse vibratory phenomena, like speech, music, earthquakes and so on.

2)Another example was at the job site, many years ago. I had a phone conversation with a female lawyer who represented a worker asking for some compensation. I was examining his practice. I answered in perfectly neutral terms, like the situation required. The lawyer then complained to my boss that I had been a little cranky at the phone. The boss asked me for clarification later, because he found that weird, so I had the opportunity to get back mentally to the recent phone call. I could really find nothing, I might have said, consciously or absent mindedly, which could have been construed as gruffy, crunky or similar. By me, but not by a female mind!!

There is one more thing personally related to you, but I'm going to tell that later in a private message, if I'm able to forward it.

Mccoy

When i was at the end of my meditation today something became very clear to me. You are being challenged to notice the more subtle nuances of life. Sometimes the exact explanation and answers are not as important as the awareness. One thing seems to be a given; either ego or a keener perception is manifesting through these encounters with others. This you already are witnessing. You are being challenged to be aware of the more discreet and subtle manifestations around you.

[mccoy]

...You are being challenged to be aware of the more discreet and subtle manifestations around you.

In this aspect, I must say I definitely improved over the years, the challenge is probably still on though.

[Jitendra Hydonus]

...You are being challenged to be aware of the more discreet and subtle manifestations around you.

In this aspect, I must say I definitely improved over the years, the challenge is probably still on though.

yes... I've been going thru my own ongoing Benifit Lesson Program myself in several areas i am aware of. If you start seeing a repetitious pattern going on - you find yourself saying- yes Master... here it comes again. After a while you can kinda see it coming on before it gets out of hand. You catch yourself as you see the lesson coming on in another guise. Such is the value and the presence of the Guru in our lives. They don't give up. They just present the lesson in similar formats. Just different enough that for awhile it catches you off guard. Then you start smiling as you see the lesson coming... and you say. I get it... i get it..
i really am trying change... honestly!

[guest58]

you are dead already

Better dead then alive. He haw ride into the underworld with me Peevacowboy!