Spiritual Portal

i have been recording my dreams every night but have been doing so on another forum. it's a wonderful idea and i encourage everyone and anyone to record their dreams and share here if you'd like or create your own thread with your name by it. her forum is down and i want to archive this somewhere so i thought i'd start one here. there's no effort to keep up or maintain, but having a dedicated thread might help keep things organized.

last night/early morning
4/19/21
there was a lion a quarter mile out. i saw him, and he saw me. his mane was glorious, he was a young adult. when i first saw him my heart sank, and i immediately sank down into a stalking/sneaking mode. but that's what triggered him to come towards me. he instantly recognized my behavior as one of observing him with keen awareness from afar. as he approached me, an ally appeared and tried to shoot him with a gun. she warded off the approaching danger.

4/21/21

Mid dream, some cross scene happens taking place at the home setting. I am trying to get Dads interest as my family and I are watching a movie of historical context. He comes home late drunk from the bar and shows an interest but my sister and mother are ready for bed. I try to stay up to show Dad but he talks through the film and we make zero progress.

Before wake-

Captured by some enemy force, they demand we make the call and say the password. The scene is like we are in a wet, dripping cave and the men are sweating and have attire similar to that of chimney cleaners. There is soot on our faces, scarfs around our necks, old timey cap/hats and heavy cigarette smoking as we dial on a rotary telephone. The men look nervously at each other and we are again demanded to say the passcode over the phone. "Ryuzthra vayloos" Zuthra ryuzthra... Some  strange combination of words like this. Is this some weird russian dialect/accent? Suddenly giant bats come forward. I believe he summoned them. I am seen riding on the back of a giant bat, using its claws or front wings like anchors climbing horizontally alongside a vertical cliff face. The bats are talking very clearly like in English. They were indeed summoned by this ally faction and we intentionally wanted our enemy to see us. The prime Bat, Mother Bat, the one I am riding is commanding her soldiers in english and there is general dread now that we are out in the open.

The dream is abruptly ended as I wake up to the sound of a low flying plane in my backyard. It's 3:44AM.

After falling back asleep I had a small OBE. I was able to get ouf of my body so easily, I was even floating a little higher. I tried phasing through my wall to go outside but it was more difficult compared to phasing through my window. Once outside I started going up towards the sky. I wanted to go higher and higher. I spotted a drone and then woke up. Upon falling back asleep now for the third time I dreamt I confronted my friends bully who is currently squatting in her place. In the dream world I tried to pull him out of her house. He then followed me into my next few dreams and rushed me with a knife which went through my hand. I wasn't bleeding but instead had chrome lining inside my skin. Another person saw it, he was like a friend and he was laughing a little as he talked about it. The wound still hurt, I could feel cold air rush through it. The bully kind of disappeared after that and a robot approached me to heal my hand. I had to inspect his ID chip to make sure he was a good guy and not another rogue element trying to harm me.

I wonder if you ever try to interject your consciousness in the dreams by telling yourself your only dreaming when eminent danger is near? I told myself that I was going to force myself awake before I had nitemares to keep them from happining. Because I did not want to experience nightmares so much I finally was able to  wake myself as they began to occur by reminding myself in the dream that I was only dreaming. After I did this several times nightmares never took place in my life again.

I love dreaming, even the scary ones. If there is something I don't want to face or acknowledge I just brush it off in the morning. But if you can wake up in your dreams, you can go anywhere and change the direction of it too.

I haven't been keeping this up, but have recalling my dreams almost every night. A couple nights ago I dreamt of a beautiful golden silky spider that I was holding so delicately.
I also had a very nice out of body experience just recently.

And Steve, I wouldn't call this one a psychic experience but more of a comical one. Last night I dreamt you were trying to impress a girl named Vicki, you were feeling uncertain about me and I think she was calling you to action- you wrote a post asking me to leave the forum because I had a violent personality.

I actually woke up laughing because it had your professional, "forum voice" in your post and I thought it was really funny. I could see this woman as silent member influencing your actions.

So I can't remember if we have a forum member here named Vicki and I would say I'm sorry if this offends- it's just a dream, nothing to serious. If anything my dreams are more revealing of my own insecurities and subconcious workings- not necessarily or always someone elses reality.
But yeah  :D Among other things this one had me grinning ear to ear

I am recounting my divorce with a friend, we might be at a bar. I am talking about the moments she cheated on me near the end of our separation and laughing about it. My friend has an old video game console out in front of him and we are both excited about the prospect of having it upgraded.

There is another scene where I am channeling someones pain, quite a few of us are. We are all experiencing her pain near our lower right hip/back end area. It it extremely uncomfortable.

In another scene I am seeing my group of friends. We are all older now. Braden is visibly aged and limping towards us. I call out that his leg is different as we all huddle up together. One person tries to hug him- and when I try to hug him he is saying he is to uncomfortable and doesn't want it- as he backs away from me I opt in for a fist bump instead.
Someone is giving us a car, but the man who wants the car is trying to keep the rail gun attachment on its side. A gentleman was putting the car in reverse and trying to empty out the bullets, and we said if you want to keep the ammunition you better run out there and let him know.

I am now witnessing through the friend who runs outside and ask for the man driving the car in reverse emptying out the ammunition to stop. The car was a sedan and the rail-gun was coming out from underneath its side, which was a very unusual memory.

Now I am running up a snowy mountain and a rather large entity like a yeti is behind me and hurling a giant cylinder of ice at me. Its massive and lands in front of me, but I am somehow given the strength to climb over the hurdle.

At the top of the mountain in a cave like setting is a man sitting in a circle of my friends group- the older version of us. My thoughts about him are he is a failed adult. He is saying something like, "and if you take me away you can never be me. I am that something that keeps the child in all of you alive."
All I could think as I was waking up was, "so he's a narcissist?"

After falling back asleep I dreamt I was in some kind of house, there were a lot of people and some kind of force that needed removed. I was then instructed to walk around the house naked in order to protest a disagreeable solution that had been played out by a type of organization above us. My instructor was not happy and himself protested by walking around the house naked. I followed his lead, he was older and had a zeus-like figure and I was younger and called him Papa to the onlookers. As he walked by some ladies they fantasized about him and when I trailed behind, two women resting inside the house said they already knew how I felt about wanting sex with them- and one of the girls let her tongue hang out and was doing something with her lips to entice me, showing her friend that I was under their seductive/playful control. After that I fell underground and was told I provided a good service for some league. I was to be recruited into the BLCL... Something like that... BLCT ?? Brothers League... Combatting terrorism?? I was to become a spy for this organization. I didn't know much more about them. I was coming off a train by the last scene and they were trying to call me and I did not recognize the phone number, when I called back it went to some strange recording. My Mother was off in the distance and I ran ontop of the tables to greet her from wherever I had just traveled- and the Brothers League had somehow contacted her through the phone but she did not know the person she was talking to belonged to the league.

Hey Steve, all good! I will have to share with you my most recent out of body experience, which is being awake in that dream like state. This one has a very similar occurence to your meditative one.

Thanks Eric but somehow I feel your testimonies with out of body experiences are much more involved and  appear more mature. As though you have developed this talent and ability in other lives and have brought that development here because it is meant to influence and inspire others. My hope is that you see I am sincere about my evaluation and your contributions....In this ‘Dream Journal’.

i was able to remember just 2 of my dreams last night. this is the one i had before waking up that seemed important.

there was an entity who talked via telepathy through its chest and we had to exert our will over it in order to release an illusion. a "prismatic psi" something(can't remember the full name for this thing). the entity itself was gaseous in nature, and could manipulate people based on environment/external factors. i remember recognizing it hidden among a group of people, and becoming entranced by its presence. not everyone could see it. i felt a pressure as i began to peer through this veil, a dream within a dream sensation. then behind it i saw the gaseous entity and felt it in my chest. here i was told something like... move past its mouth, or move past its brain- go straight to it at the chest level and use your presence to overcome.
after this, i was with a class. i think i might have been helping, maybe teaching the class. the same prismatic psi shapeshifting entity was ontop of a building. i was at the lower level. there were only a few others. my mom was there and asked what was going on. i explained to her i had to go to the very top level to take care of something. she was concerned if it was related to facing this entity and said the top level is dangerous. i told her it was and she seemed a little disturbed, but i proceeded. when i got there it was like the class and i were in bleachers watching this thing put on a show. the entity itself appeared more like a hologram in nature and was able to change shapes/faces as it levitated before us. i remember the few people in this class all honing in on the hologram, but we weren't able to peer through it- into it and get at the chest. i think this is where the "psi" part came from. the prismatic part being that it was shapeshifting. what i mean by the psi part is that it was manipulating our environment causing us to think reality was something different than what it was- and as we tried to go into IT- IT tried going back into us and taking students out of the classroom. i saw it shapeshift into a face with a curious look as it would scan us, the students, left to right to see which level of pressure was enough to pull kids out form participating. it would even try to trick students by speaking to them individually and offering some kind of solace/compensation/relief.
i was awakened by the neighbor but i think at the very tail end of the dream i was left with just a few students and i was getting deeper and deeper into its chest and revealing its true nature. one important detail that i remember, was that this thing could not touch us- despite the overwhelming amount of pressure it could exert on us. it could create something else(like different people) to approach us and talk to us- but it could not physically touch us.

in the dream before that the number 76 was relayed to me as also being important.

continued experience earlier this morning:

I just woke up from an amazing, beautiful and rewarding astral experience!  Very exciting stuff. It's 9:30AM, I never sleep in this late anymore. Since the house was empty by 8AM I figured I'd try and get a little more rest. I never left my bed, I just knew the house was empty because when I woke up I heard my parents leaving to walk the dogs. As I fell back asleep I was never comfortable enough to feel like I was actually going back to sleep. I was laying on my back. I remember raising my legs, bending in my knees and alternating hands which rest behind my head, causing a stretch and bend in the arm. As I am doing this I am hearing the most peculiar radio station. Such fantastic sounds! It's an old-timey rock and roll radio station. Each instrument is a delight, and the more I focus on it- the more it comes into my awareness. Still, I'm not quite comfortable- and I find myself readjusting my sleeping position. Now I hear a voice, talking through what feels like a wooden radio box. I am beginning to realize I am "in-between."

The same in-between sensations I get from rising out of my body are strong here as my focus is shifting from the phantom music to my ever changing sleeping position. As I lose the sounds of a particular rock group, I see a flash of black light and what looks like an aliens face directly squared in my minds eye, and a guitar has now appeared in my hands. I find myself playing to the tempo of the song- and I find my left hand sliding down the neck of the guitar, to match the frequency of the music I am playing. It's a very fast pace old school rock song. Once I am able to match the sound and even take control of the direction of the music the radio comes back into focus and I am pleasantly grooving to these beautiful sounds! I knew I was experiencing the astral-in between like I hadn't in a while- to test this I thought of something and once again a flash of black light flooded my minds eye with the same silhouette of the aliens face and a spoon appeared in my hand. My only reference was the Matrix, and I am grinning ear to ear now thinking about it. But Yes, I tried and was able to bend the spoon around, and I started to hear metal honing sounds and my focus again shifted back to my body and the in-between sensations. All of this, I am experiencing from my bed, but in the mind. As in, I was envisioning my mattress and my room exactly as it is, only there was a radio off to the left in the distance and somehow I was sitting up able to play these instruments just fine.

Lastly I am listening to the man speak on the radio. He is asking his listening audience to stay-tuned and describing something... a pizza box? Eh. He then goes on to talk about his health, blood in his coffee? Or that the coffee is blood? And jokes about it, "but who else would be here to bring you these great tunes?" and the music comes back. It's another rock song and now a pot has manifested in my hand and I am using the same spoon to strike the pot and pretending to be a drummer.

I thought about visiting the Astral Island but backed out- what was interesting about that was, that uncertainty brought a closing darkness in my vision like the dream/in-between experience was ending- or that the scene was changing when I started thinking about the pyramid on the island. Instead I started focusing more on the in-between sensations and listening to the man on the radio before waking up in this body- feel a little drugged, but really happy and energized.

PS Astral Island is a group project/experiment on the other forum where members who practice or actively seek having non-physical experiences can meet. It was an idea recently suggested that forum members are welcome to meet there, but I have been reluctant.

there were a few other details before this that i recall but am skipping because it isn't as clear as the very last part of my dream.

in the last part of my dream, i am frantically running into what is like a lower sector- a room inside an old library or school. an old man is running inside with me- the door is opened by the old mans exo skeleton- a blue apparition that was attached to him, detached itself and held the door open for us. we were discussing in a fast pace. we said something to each other and the old man like a scientist threw this potion/vile inside a container all at once. all of it. this was not good. i asked him what he was doing. and he said we were about to find out. and all of a sudden these yellow crystals rapidly started emerging from out the cylindrical beaker he threw the vile inside of. the ground started shaking- the crystals were stacking on top of each other- crude edges and they kept growing and growing. and when the beaker landed and shattered on the ground- they started coming from out of the ground. the building itself became a long tube rising up- and everyone was forced to climb up from the inside as everything else started crumbling around us.

i remember climbing up by two women, and i had an arm around each as i tried getting around them and thought it felt good. but as i moved over in order to keep myself secured i had to let go of one. it didn't feel as good. suddenly there was no where else to go, and i could see outside was nothing but ocean. there was a god in a chariot floating above the water- the feeling was like we were trapped and we were in trouble. he was a war god- and i shouted to the old man who he was. i can't remember exactly if i shouted this or he shouted this to the old man- like calling him/us out:
"VEGUS" (VAGUS?) behind the man in the chariot was Poseidon. they were coming for us all. and as soon as the god of war called us out, the chariot and him and poseidon turned around- their back facing us- two snake statues rose out from the chariot and they disappeared .

suddenly, the old man, myself and a third person were all inside a room. the god of war wanted to come in and yell at us. Poseidon or Zeus told him to leave us be. we were wearing tattered clothes, we were skinnier than normal, our house(faction) looked destroyed. we were saying something back to the Gods but fell over and onto the bed disoriented and were clearly worn.

as I woke up I was having a hard time recall, I felt someone standing behind me and over me. the same feeling like i was being looked down upon by the god in the chariot who was calling everyone out. i felt them standing on my bed- they walked over my head to my back and their leg was pressed up against my back. the feeling was a little scary  i was experiencing a bit of sleep paralysis but i rolled my back into the persons leg and they disappeared and i woke up.

there is a little bit of cold a /mild burn phantom pain in my shoulder right now where the leg made contact along my back- but i am convinced it is from my mattress and the way i sleep. really strange how i felt something walking around on my mattress. it could have been the blending of sleep paralysis/the dream itself while i simultaneously tried to recall the events of the dream- which are clearly scattered. heavy fog on me this early AM. that mind could have been disoriented as my awareness was brought back to a tossing/turning body.... but then again- i was having sleep paralysis and couldn't move...  only force myself to roll at the end which allowed me to open my eyes- by then nothing was there.

some other notes. i'm not sure why i say they were standing over my head because the entity on my bed felt like a solitary creature. and im not sure if it was a war god or apollo in the chariot, but it was definitely poseidon saying nothing standing very largely in the back. i also think i was the old man, the girl and myself at all aspects of the dream. and i am not sure if it was zeus' voice who told the other god to leave us alone or if it was still poseidon from earlier but they seemed two be two different beings. very strange- hard to recall and the more i try the fuzzier things seem to become.

i did a quick search and learned vagus is a crucial nerve that has rich spiritual meaning. i still need to read through this website thoroughly but it mentions the two snakes i saw rising from behind the chariot and briefly mentions a greek god.
https://medium.com/@sterlingcooley/ancient-secrets-about-the-vagus-nerve-revealed-e6cfeab144f6

since having this kundalini styled dream posted just above here i see there has been a lot of digging into my subconcious. not only that but the last three days i have had successful out of body experiences. on friday evening i had an opportunity for greater revelation that i willfully ignored- i did feel a sense of peace and harmony as elements from my dream came to life in the moment, at the dinner table. but i did not take the time to sit with these insights to consciously understand the message.

i am just waking up from a dream that is making the message all the clearer- and perhaps with the position of planets as you have shared steve in my chart, these dreams and subconcious musings are reflective of that reading and my current life standing. from the kundalini dream up to now i am realizing there are different aspects of my self going through turbulent trials as i communicate with a greater self and try to bring harmony to the contrasting degrees of identification.

this mornings dream is reflective of that, as i can pin point the behaviors i am tired of- the differences in personality- that i have come close to overcoming these things before- and that i am here again to try and figure it out.

im living this dream out with someone else, we are stuck in an AI simulation where an invisible overseer is able to determine a course of action based on our every move, what we say to each other, and so forth. he is the program, the characters and the environment in which we are trying to escape. we are moving through various scenes- each step that brings us closer to getting out, a scene is reset and my friend and i have to create a different response in order to trick the AI. I remember in one part of the dream I was becoming very tired for being injected into the same reality we had almost escaped, I can't recall the scenery too well- except the last portion of the dream i am in a hotel at the top floor and i ask my friend, "do you hear that?" because we reach a point in the program of eerie silence, there seems to be no interaction with external elements- my friend says the program is still listening to us- but i motion him to be quiet and we are trying to figure out how to take advantage of this unique vantage point which seems to be a safe haven from experiencing inquisitive but lifeless characters and a possible reset.

I usually have dalmatians, have my whole life. They're part of our family. We tried owning golden retrievers once and they got sick from parvo as puppies and we had to return them to be cared for.

I felt like I was coming out of an adventure this morning- the last thing I really remember is a woman standing or sitting behind me as we tried to escape in an airplane. I was the pilot and having trouble turning the engine over, and she was increasingly becoming worried as the danger was approaching. We finally made it out of there, a package dropped from the airplane and oddly enough a bunch of puppies came out of the packages and were running up a grassy knoll towards their freedom. Their were dalmations and all kinds of puppies and a type of terrier lead the charge which I recognized as my next dog. Although he too was a puppy I also saw him in his full size(medium size) and he had a long beard.

I've been recording my dreams almost regularly on another forum. I like having the dedicated space as you know... And anyways... I woke up this morning to a peculiar one... Was looking back and found a similarity from a 'fun' dream not to long ago. This one I just woke up from felt more like I was watching something outside my self.

Anyways... Here they both are... I think the correlation is the machine-like astral life and the remote viewing.

this one is july 7th
total ego booster, the world had become overrun by machines and lawlesness and i was a high value target to a few key players.i was untouchable and learned how to hack the system, manipulate reality, possess others, fill up my bank account, fly and teleport. machines gave me an ability to see a type of omnipresence even as they were stacked against me. random but beyonce was very sensual with me and we kissed. by the end of the dream i was almost captured by some prince of equal power at an airport. he had the ability to change bodies and asked me to help his cause. i remember his attire went from modern business to ancient robes. typical movie style bad guy acting casual in the chaos and sipping his drink. this dream is kind of funny but i enjoy a few things about it.

and here is this mornings,
there's a young male and female. i have an aerial view of what looks like a mansion, but i zoom out and see an even larger mansion- its more like a town but it all belongs to one entity. it looks like london. the young male and female are exploring this territory together. they breach into an area they shouldn't. i think they are scientist. the young woman becomes possessed by parasitic like aberrations. i am remembering a scene... they are back in the original mansion in two rooms across from each other. the young male looks concerned as the woman is repeatedly being flung up into a thick glass wall which separates her from everyone else. she doesn't even mind,  it's keeping the young man up at night. the colors are dark, cool blue. i remember hearing the thud of her body slamming by some kind of magical force into the glass over and over- creating cracks. my mother and i are witnessing this woman now, another scene, where she is driving around. we see those mental aberrations are actually able to touch her. the vision we witness together is like this big metal insect thing trailing behind her in her car, it is moving like a dragon and phasing through material- and it comes up underneath the car and goes straight for the woman's vagina. it feels very astral like. the metal insect has fuzzy pincers and an ant shaped head. its like we're zoomed in on this process of some kind of spore transplant- it's eating or putting something into that woman. by the end of the dream that same woman is pregnant and the focus is her womb. whatever it is, is very lively. her belly is even a little misshapen as it moves about. we learn that she is proud she says something like- when given a chance... in reference to a cell or an embryo. apparently she is hosting a jellyfish hybrid of some sort and can't wait to give birth to it. in her mind this is all for research. but she is also quite fond of the attachment. something about, the visions being real.
as i try to remember more about this dream all i continue to see is when she was possessed by some invisible force being slammed into the glass wall... her driving and the astral-shape shifting like creature following... the spores... hmm. very specific too- about a jellyfish hybrid and a 'injection'...

There have been a lot of insects lately. Yesterday it was power washing centipedes off the driveway. I'm sharing this one because I was a student practicing meditation and Guru was there...

The beginning scene, I am covered in insects. It is disturbing-ish. I am pulled out from a focused point of view and see, dark light- glowing green/jade. There is a shelled insect with green, and there is a shattering effect. Everything is shattering. There is a theme in my dream, growing- getting stronger.

Later I am somewhere in a class like setting. I've learned all kind of things. Chase & Brian are interchanging characters. I see Chases Dad in one of the scenes. We have a test, and have to move through darkness. My friend is concerned, I am enjoying this trial a little too much. We had to steal something from a group of shadow-tribe like people. It was red lines of energy, impaling material, there was no feeling. I wonder if I am concerned too. Something feels off. I am one of the last people in the group and am almost caught by the tribe we infiltrate.

I come back to the class. The feeling here is, we have been coming here day after day- years have passed since our beginning trials. We keep leaving that class and coming back to it, the passing years and evolution in skills all happen in this one dream. There is a guru who comes out. He is the one we want to impress. He taught us how to fly. Chase is interchanging with Brian as they try to distance themselves from me and sit next to Guru. I remember looking at Brian and seeing his face, he looked concerned and silently pleading to Guru for even more strength by sitting next to him.

The last part of the dream ends in meditation. This is really nice. Guru leads the meditation. Apparently we've been doing this regularly- but now, there is a noticeable difference how fast the group 'settles in.' By the second breath we are going very deep. I take my eyes off my concerned friend and Guru and instead close my eyes and join the group in rhythmic breathing. I break away from the group and go even deeper and slower with the breath- I really begin to disconnect from everything and everyone around me, my thoughts have slowed down and the sensation is like I am pulled out from my body. I wake up.

Looks like your meditation practice has extended to your dreams. Great advance! Hope you can keep on this path of ascension. Paramahansa Yogananda has said we create karma even in our dreams. I suppose not many of us have a lot of control there. Although I do find that our character we have awake extends to dreamland. That is we rarely become something we are not in our awake state… in moral character…

I’m not sure if you have lightning bugs there in Texas we have many here in the summer and they have a greenish jade light that people from out west are quite delighted in since they have no such bug that lights up on its own in the dark. Perhaps 🤔 you saw some in Pennsylvania when you were there. There are also shelled as you described here.

Hi Steve,

Thank you for your interest and reply. I hadn't realized you posted in here until now. Yes I loved seeing the lightning bugs in PA, especially as a kid. None that I know of here in Houston.

I've had a few more prominent dreams. Two days ago it was about powerful and manipulative entities coercing me into a type of project. I obliged an old friend creating a multi-level building until I became tired of his pushing and walked away. I told him I did not want to repeat old patterns. I realized he is the kind of energy to use me for personal gain and his attempts to persuade me make me uncomfortable.

Here is last nights dream/this morning. If I hadn't told you, recording the dreams has created an awareness of layered realities. Characters are interchangeable and sometimes it's as if past/present and future are happening simultaneously. Unless my point of awareness anchors into a specific reality- and I am then living out the dream like a movie in chronological order. It's an intriguing experience.

I dreamt that my Pappy (Grandpa) is going to die soon. It might be around Easter. Dad was there. There were two different layers. One reality is somewhere in Hawaii. Another, my bedroom. The night before Pappy's death, Dad noted his strange behavior. Dad called 911. I remember relaying to Pappy over the phone, "911 Pappy- 911." Pap knew what was going on, he knew he was about to die. They took him away from us. Somewhere in this dream was an adventure between these events- a mission. There was en entity overseeing everything.
April (Sister) hadn't a clue, neither did Mom- until the event transpired. I am heart-broken. One of the first deaths in our family that I could feel. I think Pappy went on to live. He was relaying messages to me, post death.
There is a random scene where Mom allows April and her girlfriends to sleep in my bedroom, and I am forced to sleep in the room Pappy was last in before they took him away.
There was a lot of talk around death in my dreams last night. The last portion of dreaming I am with a warrior of some sort by a Volcano in Hawaii. The warrior takes me to a hot and thin running stream of lava. He kneels down into the stream- the lava burns him. Burns us? He's calmly killing himself. He tells me, "Die with a purpose."

Steve, I wanted to update you and tell you I learned the other night that my Pappy is in the ICU. He is still there, it's been two days now.

Before I learned this I went to see a friend. I placed my keys and phone on her bar. There is plenty of surface area so nothing just slides off. It was only us in her apartment. Well something threw my phone off her bar-top. She was spooked and we quickly changed the subject.

Considering the dream, "911 Pappy, 911" ... And to learn the next day Pappy was submitted to the hospital. Of all the objects laying there, this phantom force threw my phone. I've never had that happen before.

I've prayed and communicated with my Pappy... I believe he is going to be okay.

The phantom throw has left me bewildered.

...The other night I went running kind of shooken up by recent events. It was dark. By a certain point in my jog I felt the weight of my breath, the opening of my mind and the workings of my imagination. It felt like I was being pulled into an alternate reality. Even though my imagination was leading the charge, it felt like that dimension was very real-

With everything that has happened recently, I am in a bit of a weird head-space and wanted to keep you informed. Well... Good night Bro.

I've never had those things happen to me. You and Steve and the ghost stories, I wonder. I believe they happened, but I don't understand why I've never seen anything. Maybe I'm not worth it. Must be a reason. They don't like me. They're afraid of me. I dunno. Not that I'm wishing for it to happen. Still...

Thought about keeping a journal of dreams, but seems nothing is really worth saving. I need to sleep hard, and most times I dream very light or not at all. I need good sleep for the next day, too much dreaming for me seems to make me feel like I didn't get enough sleep. Different mindset I guess.

Hi SI. The phone sliding off the table is the first time it's happened that I can recall. I've had plenty of dreams and other worldly experiences- but this one is another unique thing on its own. It kind of validates a lot that has happened in my life. I talked with my Aunt about the phantom energy and she confided in me ,the same thing happened before Nanny passed. Nanny is Pappy's wife- my Aunt's Mother. She said a coffee mug slid off the table on its own. She believes Nanny was trying to communicate a message to her around the time of her death... And she believes she received the message which was confirmed by a flickering of the lights. I consider my Aunt and I, my Pappy and I a close-knit or like-minded soul-group(if there is such a thing).

Dream work has evolved into something amazing- I've always been interested in dreams as a kid- in "Spirit talk" and have tried really hard to experience more and more. My dream journal started off with mentally recalling as soon as I wake up. I hadn't started writing things down until later.

I learned in psychology that the average person has 8 dreams a night, but hard enough time recalling 1. I do, at times, feel I am sacrificing rest- when having to wake up early for work interferes with wanting to write the dreams. I encourage you to get into it if you want to do it- I have found an online group where we have inter-related themes as we compare our nightly dreams and practice recording them regularly. It's all extremely fascinating- especially when you feel like the subconscious work is somehow interacting with your immediate reality. It's a whole new world...

PS,
Steve if you see this Pappy is doing better. His heart isn't working properly, the lower ventricles are the only things working right. Aunt says he'll need a pacemaker to ease whatever time he has left. The nurses said they caught him trying to exercise his arms to speed up his recovery. He is a warrior.

two layered dream.
in one layer/reality i am reviewing my past and recent relationships. i am being shown certain relationships are dead, like with brenda, but i am holding on to one-sided behaviors that bring me comfort.

simultaneously,
in the other layer/reality i am in my house scared for my life. there is an energy, dan. he is an online stalker. i think he wants to kill me. the feeling is he works for a police styled organization as a cover to hide his ill-intentions. i think he is middle aged, tousled brown hair and leaves his shirt tucked in. danger is imminent.
i am frantically setting up extra lines of defense and moving around my house in the dark when dan approaches. i carry a large kitchen knife close to my chest. i quietly put the back side light on. i sneak and prop a kitchen chair up against the back door, out of sight. i notice my dog under the kitchen table(just one, is it tye my last dog?) calm and resting. my heart is racing and my awarwness floats to my neighbors house, sammy(no longer my neighbor) with the hopes he can help me. his lights are on and they are home. dan is close and my online friend, steve from spiritual portal is remotely singing a song/mantra to me as an offering and protection
"oh eric(om eric?) babaji, forever." he repeats in a melody.

PS I don't think this is any Dan we know... NO OFFENSE INTENDED <3

i saw carolina and hugged her. i carried her in my arms as we talked with others. she liked it a lot.

afterwards i am marching outdoors in line with others. theres a man explaining money to us, i think its calvins dad and he is testing us.

last portions of dream im again outdoors in satsang with gurunath. he applies sandalwood on himself and makes some kind of oil in front of everyone, saying each ingredient, and then chanting into a bowl. someone next to me yearns to feel the chanting in their heart. gurunath stands up and walks through the crowd. he comes up to me and others and i think uses his thumb to put the oil on my forehead. i immediately go from sitting to falling on my back and am enjoying the sensations as i look at the sky and close my eyes. he reappears later in the middle of a crowd of people behaving like children and ask who we think the greatest musician was- someone else answers and i long to tell him, "a sufi!" but i don't get the chance. instead he leads in song and claps his hands getting others to join. he strung an instrument and the b sounded like "booze" (boosh) i think a reference to alcohol. it had a strong and low reverberation.

at the very end i wake up naked laying on concrete in the sun. i wonder if im homeless and im changing my age and physical appearance before crawling through some kind of bleachers and waking up to this body.

yesterday i had very wild adventure/dreams and i recall walking up to a podium with an always shifting book. the book expanded, reflected light, changed to a disc, and back to a book. i felt pulled in by its gravity and it was unique to be in an environment constantly changing.

this morning i remember interviewing someone who works and prides himself on monster trucks. he looks a little like ben stiller. he belongs in our group project and we are doing a report on adult diapers and why adults have to wear them. i learn even young people have damaged bladders and leak urine.

unsurprisingly i begin to wake up with the urge to pee. during all of this i feel like i am a child in a winter wonderland and someone is narrarating my dream like a christmas carol. it feels like a movie with very pleasant music as my awareness shifts from first person through the eyes of a curious child to a blanketed awareness over all characters.

as the child i am peeping my head into a mound where dalmatians reside as a family and a gold light keeps us warm from the snow. i dont actually fit inside the home/burrow but i stick my head in while the rest of my body lay in the snow. just as my awareness shifts and i wake up i hear the narrarator comment,

"and since all of us have our own thoughts, its the witness that makes us feel pure."

i think he meant spirit? and that basically all the characters, the child, the dogs and everything in the dream was witnessed in stillness as the music played, the warm light kindled something special and all shared a sense of purity free from thought in a comforting moment. my awareness zoomed in on the head of the child just as i woke.

ps i took a screenshot of what the voice said as to remember the details. the time is 3:55AM
555 feels very "melchizedek" in energy

Man are you tired the following day after living the whole night? Just curious.

😂 yea he really has an active subconscious… in fact he has three planets in the 12th house of the subconscious!

Which is up for debate of course, but there may be other things at play as well.

Sometimes I think there are things that can happen to those that sort of haven't come to terms with something, maybe unexplained things or things that cause fear.

No. I have recalled my dreams since a child, being one of the most magical realities I am grateful to experience. Even the nightmares. For this reason I think it comes easy.

I was taught the average person has around 8 dreams a night but a hard time remembering one. My recall is around 2-3 but there are times I don't remember much-

The experience of flying and consciously leaving my body as a child is something I hold on to, and put in the same magical world as diving within the subconscious. A territory not commonly explored. I sincerely believe the universe a living intelligence and will communicate with you through your interest, among other things.   

I don't care to debate what others think about my life, I share based on these beliefs- and it is a joy recording dreams and making connections.

Hello Si,

I cannot speak for 🤔 where Eric gained the gift of his colorful evening insights and experiences but I can speak from my own experiences. Last nite I just had a dream that was in a certain setting and time replete with music. I woke up still hearing the refrain. I wanted to just ignore it and go back to sleep. For several reasons I did not. These little ‘gifts’ are provided to us by ‘agents’ beyond our knowledge and recognition and often have divine messages.

What divine message did you get?

Here is one short and concise with a melody;

Tell me what you goina do with your life?
Tell me what you goina say?
In one unselfish moment
In one unselfish way.

If that's a divine message then I've gotten tons of those. I guess my expectations are too high.

sometimes symbolism is so rich in dreams you stop and wonder what it might mean... last nights dream and the foggy details.

I'm on skates at a park, I am jumping down a slide and trying to skate on concrete ledges- metal beams, wooden fences. I remember going down a ramp and jumping up, trying to hold my skates in the air- and repeating the practice. I skate forward and back and try touching them off the wall to turn around. In the distance I see two kids with incredible upper body strength. One of them is wearing a gi. They are practicing something too. Their forearms are resting on the ground as they kick their legs up and over their heads so that there is a bend in their back and their feet are pointing forward. One kid is able to do it easier than the other. They are walking forward in this position.
(http://www.athleta.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/e17-forearmstand-bent-legs-1.jpg)
They continue practicing walking forward and back. One kid gets so good at it, and he ends up walking on his forearms along a fence.

There is a woman and she is asking me to leave her a hickey. At first I don't but she puts her leg into my mouth and tries to rub her bone on my teeth and smiles. I position her thigh and start sucking on her skin just above her knee. She tilts her head back and smiles. I leave her another mark near her collar-bone but make sure it's in an area she can hide it when she wears her clothes. She tells me she feels beautiful again and is wearing a red buttoned down flannel slightly opened up so you can see parts of her black bra. She is smiling.

At the skate park, I don't know if this is the same woman but she appears as I am practicing my abilities to maneuver on skates. At the top of the deck, I believe her husband is with her. But we share a familiarity. Her husband is loud and smiling, and doesn't notice us looking at each other and feeling happy. I give her a brief kiss on her lips when he isn't looking and she is pleased. I am then put in a sales position and have to go door-to-door and I explain how difficult it has been- when the womans husband shows up at the park and offers everyone a free, something... In an effort to steal the clientele.

Last part of the dream is very surreal. It's a new scenery and I have been instructed to kill people when a black rose appears in the astral next to them. I don't know at first but somehow make the connection. I my self might be in the astral, or some in-between world and am wielding a sword. The last person I remember is a girl talking to her sister. She is the second or third person I am doing this to. I see the black rose and am reluctant, but walk up and slice her head off. The womans head I sliced off... She knew it was her time to go, and knew the manner in which everything was happening. Her sister was not ready to accept and was talking to her even after I sliced her head for it was still attached. I remember walking away, music playing, and the sister crying once her head slid off- she got a really good look at her headless sister.. But the head I cut off was cut off with a smile on her face. And as I walked away the black rose lay next to her. I woke up to this interesting music playing. No words- just music.

Do you feel you are being manipulated?

No SI.  I feel I am being guided and protected.

The feeling at the end of this dream was a sadness shared with the Sister as the music was playing.
 

The feeling of guided and protected or any feeling could be hiding possible manipulation.

Who knows why.

I mean if I was having that kind of detailed dream, I question it. And I may not have detailed dreams because if anyone or anything tried to do anything like that to me, I'm going to expose it. I don't trust it. Need to relay a message to me? Just come out with it. Don't play the dream game. But that's just me.

Hey SI,

Not just you, but not me.

I have faith, through out my personal experiences I have been safe and protected- even in moments almost too scary to face. Some of my scarier moments have been in facing the ugly aspects of my self. I don't think there's anything nefarious at play here and am not worried about it.

I see. Are you easy to scare?

I'm not interested in humoring your personal questions SI. Back off.

Are you practicing Kriya now SI? Eric call me out on it if I’m incorrect but I think you feel as I do about Babaji’s promise to us…

Even a little practice of this dharma (religious rite or righteous action) will save you from great fear (mahato bhayat)' — the colossal sufferings inherent in the repeated cycles of birth and death. -- Read more: http://yogananda.com.au/gurus/babaji_quotes02.html

Hey guys,

I've decided to lock this topic. This is my dream journal. Just as we respect SI's dedicated photos only thread- I think it's nice we all have our own space here to express our selves. If you find your self wanting to practice dream recall or are interested in maintaining your own journal- we can stick it atop the forum here and give you the space to do so.

Thank you.

I am remembering only the last portion of my dream, with shifting buildings and landscapes. I am somehow cursed by a woman. There's a big focus on these sliding and sinking buildings. I am trying to find a solution to my problem.

By the end, even after escaping this sinking building my nerves are still screaming as it feels like I am struggling in pain to maintain consciousness.

I learn this womans curse/game goes to far. She explains it's supposed to feel as if my cells are suffocating. She aims to kill me and there's no escape.

At the very end of my dream I am transformed into this defeathered, wart covered, skin only crow. I fly my self to this place occupied by another cursed person, another monster.

I am observing from third person but my thoughts are still shared with this hideous version of me, my cursed self.

I hear that my solution is an act of service, to allow this cursed maiden to eat me which would kill us both, ending our suffering.

When I land in her courtyard, she remains hidden, instead birds come to peck at my decaying flesh and eat upon me.

Eventually even they fly away, altogether, and I am no longer feeling my nerve endings contracting and screaming in agony. Instead I remember zooming in on a very beautiful red and black caterpillar. There is this surreal electric effect surging around his body, I am watching him crawl in contrast against this dark marble. It's like the scene is breathing, and I am finding moments of peace or beauty.

I remember some additional, end of dream details.

Girls planning to hang out together despite their cruelness to one another.

And my Aunt finding a solution to a similar curse, with magnetic ice plates screwed upon her chest- keeping whatever pain from the curse at bay.

I also have the faintest recollection of unscrewing something to escape the flooding/sinking structure.

Cloudy details now.

Distinct memories of the dreams...

One is me sitting in a chair and holding a single match. I am playing with the flame, turning it on and off by will.

Another is my Aunt, and cousin Ashley. We are going on a pilgrimage- they are both at different and unique levels of finding themselves. I remember marching people along towards a beach. I can see an aerial view as two groups separate. I am not worried as my vantage point shows me they re-unite before arriving at their final destination.

Another is a room with my Mother. There are three medium sized pillars inside a building with flames resting at the top of each, and an altar with fire in front. The pillars are covered by a transparent blanket of white light draped over the flames, their energy is like a gentle spinning vortex. The room is more like...  an amber hallway. Stone walls, gentle light. Everything is, alive- a beautiful and slow moving energy. The same way I toyed with the flame from holding the match I am practicing on the altar. I watch the flame rise and the flame on the center pillar behind it does the same, while the other two glow. And as I descend the flame, so do the fires atop the pillars. I stop and just watch the fires return to normal. I am mesmerized by this white blanket of energy draped over each pillar- they remain unaffected. This was the shortest part of my dream, but the most attention to detail I can recall. There was a very special feeling about this room or hall... it was captivating, and time was not the same here. I believe I witnessed this space, eventually, without a body- just existing as, formless form? I can see the room even now in the back of my mind, and again- this was the shortest part of my dream but I am especially called to this place- it feels as if it exist outside time as I know it.

In the beginning, I remember Mary our delivery specialist helping me sort out our orders as we normally do. There's a pair of muffins we almost forget and we are delivering out to the country. There's more here, it's very hard to recall- feels like the person we are delivering to is some kind of witch? The dream devolves into some type of competition, and all I remember is trying to escape- in order to escape, I have to play. The land is very surreal.

What I can start to remember, with more clarity, is having to descend into a dark tunnel. It feels like I am moving though an underground city and jump into a canal of water- I plunge my head and see water spiraling towards me, I have to move past it and into blackness. I emerge into another memory of the dream...

Now I am in the shower locker, I am still 'on the run' but the feeling has shifted- there's a goal and the game has provided me an underwater suit that allows me to carry up to an additional 50lbs- I run past people and into the showers to put the suit on. As I am sitting on the bench, Will Smith walks up behind me... He is trying to tease me and calls me Boy. I reply to him, some snarky answer, a type of intelligence I don't normally posses- showing some kind of understanding of what's happening, and my mission... He replies back using an equal intelligence- words I have never heard before and can't remember, then tells me to call him Sir. He lurks behind me like he is going to grab me and I remember throwing my elbow as hard as I can into his pelvis. The jab takes as he stumbles back with surprise when suddenly the rest of the people in the shower gang up on me.
They throw me in some kind of laundry cart and start beating my face. I am pleading for them to stop as Will is standing in the back smiling. I tell him I am playing the game and pleading that no one goes on the airplane. I tell him I am trying to stop the airplane. The suit I was wearing was to help me? He begins to understand, watching as a kid hits me in the back of my head- and I believe he himself takes on the mission and runs towards the desired goal, leaving the locker-room.

Another part of the dream recollection...
Now I am walking across someones yard with my family. There's a mechanical prop out front. It is very life-like. We are watching with amusement. You can see she is attached to the yard she moves about with extending poles. We believe her routine to be some kind of program. She is bouncing a tennis ball three times off the ground and catching it with one hand- on the third bounce the ball moves away from her and she twirls around the yard- picks it up and tries again. Each time she is moving closer to us. At one point the ball goes between Dad and I and she twirls around us. My Dad comments on the precision and advancement of the robotics as we start to walk away. I feel the need to thank the 'robot' as we walk past and into someones house- "Thank you" I say when she suddenly replies- "But I have a tennis ball for you too, come and play." I walk up to the prop and give her a hug. She hugs me when suddenly her smile turns awry and her hands turn into cold steel-single prong like shapes which are turned down and into my lower back. I feel her push in, tearing my skin and sear across my back which sends me into shocking pain- I wake up convulsing, the cold sharp pain is still there on my lower left! The need to pee allows me to shake the feeling off. I don't dare check my back for any scratch marks- I don't care to give any more life to this feeling.

After I use the restroom I immediately see a pattern between sergio, casey and my self. That is- this game, or challenge before us. I think to come here to record but decide to go back to sleep for a little- if I remember, I'll record later... I fall asleep into another dream.

I am in a classroom... My boss, Sharon, is leading the class. There is yet another challenge- one that is more a recruitment. The feeling is like there are three of us among the students trying to see who will enroll- who will not. I remember a Father and Son asking me questions about the job, and as the Father tells me his objections Sharon arrives. I ask him to present his objections to her- Sharon and I seem disappointed that he is not interested. I think it has something to do with money. I watch the others who have succeeded in recruiting members- just when I thought I lost, the Son gives Sharon his card- I can't remember much about the card... Just that the Son enrolls with us, which sends the Father into an outrage. He leaves the classroom as the Son and I watch quietly, I can feel the Sons emotions behind this. Yet another surprise, an alarm goes off and we are all forced to evacuate the building. I am telling the students, as I am running with them, to pace themselves- don't overwhelm each other and trample upon others. I remember seeing my old high school friend being the first one to shout something like- mindful strides. A girl runs past me and tells me they've poisoned the area. We are being gassed. Is there no escape?

I get to a room where we are all crowded up against cafeteria doors and can see people on the other side. There's also some tarp with plastic zipties holding it down. I remember grabbing a chair trying to break this plexiglass. Or trying to use the same chair to break the zipties. Suddenly I am observing out of body a woman laying on the ground. She was captured. And there is a mask on her, with teeth on the inside of the mask. There is a team in hazmat and the woman leading this rush is questioning the woman they've captured- of course she can't talk. All she can do is scream as her mask starts to fill with water and the teeth start to eat her face. This is really strange but the woman leading the team with hazmat break into some kind of song/dance routine explaining what they're doing- that they infiltrate our systems out of love- that they'll come to our schools, our homes. I do not trust whatever is happening. Like a movie my attention is brought back to the woman on the ground suffering alone. The mask on her releases its grip and the woman in hazmat- another old high school friend by the name Kathy- ask her "how many" and to my surprise the woman replies 5. She says she is responsible for killing at least "5 of them." I haven't a clue. That was enough for them, and the mask(seemingly self conscious) starts to tighten its grip on her face once more as she wreathes about, it looks like she is drowning in a self contained unit. The mask release its grip for the final time and leaves her, it slides off and moves away like an octopus as the woman is left laying on the ground defeated- it stole her voice.

I wake up.

A little kid was watching me from the ledge of a second story, I was throwing a mallet and using my will to bring it back to my hand like Thor. It was a tremendous weight but I was allowed to lift it, like it was a privilege or right. It was a practice stopping the mallet in the air and urging it back into my hand. The kid smiled with amusement, there was an older woman with him but she was in disbelief more than acknowledgment.

There was someone else there with me harnessing the power of lightning. I remember he was sending someone through, something, using lightning. The only other way I can recall it is that someone else was riding the lightning, sitting in front of the energy lotus position.

So happy to be in your world again now because it has always been fascinating to me that

Your World

your world takes me to a place I’ve never seen
your world takes me to a place I’ve never been
your world

don't know what to call it, an 1111 device. two objects, stones, no larger than the palm positioned in a way that could allow one to peer into another world or view point. they were on a table and i moved them in a precise fashion and one of the stones turned into a viewing portal. an alien device?

wake up and tell my self to remember this device... want to record but am to tired.

later... confronting ghostly apparitions? at a river bank, living on one side- silent ghouls on another? one ghoul points to me and i am now gliding above the water, moving up and down stream- water is clear and i see blue snakes with dragon shaped heads resting under the water. before wake, brought back to the group of ghost. the living talk among themselves and ask what they saw- one kid says he saw an angel kneeling by the riverbed.

as i wake back up i want to go back to sleep but my mind can not rest until i log the device from dream 1. had to pull my body from rest to wake- struggling with a bit of sleep paralysis. there are sounds of water splashing outside- there is no pool in my backyard.

I'll tell you what a good man once told me,
It's your world, I'm just living in it.
 :o

I dream that the TV is so loud, and there are two different noises going on at once it causes me to wake up. As I lay in bed contemplating whether I should record or not I am feeling more inclined to go back to sleep. I begin to notice a almost inaudible vibration. I hear the heater, I hear the cars outside(some are racing), I hear a police car... And I hear a noise underneath all that. I go to use the restroom and notice there are noises coming from construction vehicles and it's near 2AM. I go back to my bed and feel like there's still something underneath all this noise, two separate noises. It almost feels like an unwelcomed frequency, and one that I begin to think is affecting everyone in the area. I am awake now and can hear the sea of cars, the birds, movement in the house- and that unwelcomed noise is gone... The house is more comfortable. I think it has something to do with city living and being subjected to all kind of ill-practices regarding sound and an unsuspecting population.

I fall back asleep eventually and dream about a shapeshifter. He/She/It finds me first. First it is a he, following me home and attempting to kill my friend and I. As soon as I suspect foul play I try to entrap the entity, as he continues to pursue us. There is a bit of anxiety, but in this game of cat and mouse it seems I have allies to assist me. The dream ends with the shapeshifter taking form of a girl who we impale, and she transforms two more times at a much faster rate in front of us- going from human to something much different. We burn the impaled creature feeling there is no other way to rid ourselves of it. It took quite the effort to capture that which had come for me first.

There was an invasive species/technology being looked at under a microscope. These doctors are my friends. We note that as I get close to the sample the organism starts to grow and replicate- when I back away from it, it wanes down losing its power. We think it has something to do with my blood- I am placed in a chair and lay back. At one point my heart begins to have issues and the doctor uses a defibrillator to bring me back.

Quite possibly I am having a dream about an out of body experience- I am entering into a type spirit world. The same doctors are there in the beginning, I'm given a bear skin and a sort of chainmail to wear for my journey. I am invisible to others and able to levitate, floating up a mountain path. Specifically, I am visiting an elder. There are others trekking up the mountain to visit her. When I arrive- she takes me into a corner and gives me a chance to talk to her in private. I think I begin to cry and tell her I've become tainted or corrupt. I tell her about the organism in my blood. She assures me everything is okay, waves her hand over my forehead- and next thing I know I am descending back down from the mountain.

On the way down I hear her voice in my head- she reminds me...Something about a bird and hell. Something like this can surely be hell when they steal and eat the birds egg. I have no clue. I phase from out of body and actually am no longer able to levitate- I am at the bottom of the mountain and talking to a girl. I realize I am no longer a type of apparition- surprised she can see me I become aware of how uncomfortable my chainmail and animal skin have become. I take off my protective gear and continue walking.

Later in the dream I return to a scene with friends. I am exhausted- so I sit in a chair with my feet kicked back. One of my friends is at the top of the balcony trying to play jokes on me and attempts to blow a dart at me. I place my hand up and the dart stops mid-projection. I lower my hand and the dart drops to the ground. We look at each other, my friend seems surprised. Not quite satisfied I show him I can even lift the dart up if I try. I raise my hand and the dart begins to rise up. Some of my friends watching begin to take an interest. My friend tries to blow another dart at me and I grab a bow from under my chair with my own dart. Both of our darts have a blinking LED at the end. I remember seeing my friends comment that I've pulled my bow out as I fire away. It pierces his skin- moving through the back of his neck and earlobe.  The scene shifts, I am now helping my friend by removing the dart lodged at the back of his skin. It hurts him so I find a way to push it out instead of pull on it and he is relieved- I see the hole in his earlobe after having been impaled by the dart and ask if he is okay. He says yes.

At the very end of the dream just before wake, I dream I am at citycenter where I have plans to go to later today. I see a friend I've lost contact with in the distance, he has a blue backpack and is walking away from me into a crowd of people. It's William. I wake up and decide to record.

I dream I am two angels. One represents nature and the other Spirit. I am fighting my self and enjoying the competition.

This is the second dream this year I received specific yoga position that I've not practiced before. This one came at the end of the dream and I was attempting the position. Perhaps it is a sign to practice in the waking. Here is the yoga pose I dreamt of last night:
(https://www.forteyoga.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/Frog-Cobra-Yoga-Pose.png)

Namaste friend

The photo I left here is actually me at a younger age but I still practice the cobra pose and the scorpion pose which you dreamed about.

https://www.verywellfit.com/scorpion-pose-vrschikasana-3567113

The first pose you have here is the scorpion pose-an advanced pose/asana

The second one is the cobra pose. Simpler and one a beginner can accomplish. Be sure to bend in the lower back even though you may lift the head only a little bit.

https://www.verywellfit.com/cobra-pose-bhujangasana-3567067

I left a photo of me doing the scorpion pose when I used to teach hatha yoga every week.... several classes.

Since I did very rigorous asana poses at an early age and even practiced them in my high school gym class - much to my gym teacher’s dismay.... I believe that I was only reliving a past life in India.






[attachment deleted by admin]

Cool picture- yes the last yoga pose was a combo of cobra and frog.

Thanks for your interest... see photo below....

[attachment deleted by admin]

Cobra pose below...

[attachment deleted by admin]

Steve below is a picture of me doing yoga, see self portrait
(https://i.ebayimg.com/d/w1600/pict/332967072269_/New-Top-Collection-Fairy-Garden-Mini-Yoga-Frog.jpg)

A bit slimy but after all it is some semblance of the frog pose.

I had a dream with you in it Steve, our communications were improved and you were also channeling a guy by the name of Daniel?

I woke up after that, when I fell back asleep I had a dream of a very controlling woman into some very kinky stuff, genders were reversed where guys had female bits- it was strange. That dream ended with two brothers in war. They were strung out on a ledge and one had a pet alligator fighting by his side, eating the sword of the enemy. The brother who lost his sword stuck his head in a grinder decapitating himself as his final urge and it caused the other brother to mourn.

Dreams are fascinating, and the more you practice recalling and recording- the better the retrieval and information that comes through becomes. I have been recording daily at Casey Claars Galactic Travel Channel. The reason I had this blocked off was because I did not enjoy others challenging my beliefs and safety with my experience. I believe I am safe, I believe dreams are more than just random- but valuable information. And as it has been documented at Casey's website, sometimes people from two different parts of the world will share the same dream- the same night. I have shared symbols with Casey, and just recently a woman form Hong Kong. Although I was awake during my experience, while she was dreaming. These moments leave one to question that nature of reality and a universal consciousness.

I admired the way Casey set it up,
A dream log here:
https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/omtalks/group-log-document-your-daily-dreams-log-only-t1618-s1695.html
A LOG form only...
And a discussions thread here:
https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/omtalks/discussion-for-group-daily-dream-log-t1616.html
For others to discuss and explore their dreams together.

Last night I experienced a tonal effect in my left and right ear. It was out of the ordinary, and my intuition was very clear. They were distinct personalities checking in on me. The ringing in my right ear went off at the :33 time stamp which is a typical sign for those who follow promptings in this manner that an "ascended being" is near. In this case, we will just call it a higher lifeform- one that is able to peek into our reality and grab our attention.

I found it interesting that in my dream I would receive a name(as I have before... It's how I learned of Sufism) and that there would be a "tonal" massage against my spine as something therapeutic and quite miraculous...
Well the girl who recorded her dream before me saw two separate light beings and was practicing with tibetan healing bowls... For us this is not a coincidence.

Here's the dream and journal entry,
There's a girl on the forum named AINYANHO? Ain for short, I ask if I can call her Aya. She host a type of get together. She's into certain books and creating a space for audio books she finds inspiring. In our get together she puts a trombone against my back and gently plays various notes. It is doing wonders to my spine. It feels very therapeutic.  This is the most prominent detail I hold onto.

There are little bits and pieces of recall. Friends wanting to get together, beer. Working class. Shuffling through halls, holding onto a computer. Faint detail of different worlds/realities colliding. I wake up at 2:33, the healing by AIN is what I decide to hold on to. Also want to note that, in this waking space yesterday with my internal desires being broadcast to connect- ringing in the ear had been going off earlier in the night. Two separate occasions. Two different beings? One type of note in my left ear.... And then again at another :33 time stamp very high pitch note in my right ear. It wasn't typical and felt like someone was paying me a visit.   

Steve I share because I know you find it interesting... And I had the thought this morning.
Over the phone, you told me of a past life we might have shared that was paradisal compared to this. Something that keeps me here is you. Where would I be without your creating the spiritual portal? But also... Why would I come back when the GTC feels like my Home(as far as online communities go).
Because I think you are a part of that Home. It's also why I am still active on a very inactive forum the 1111 message board. There are people there that feel like they are a part of my Home too. And the thought occurred to me, this has to do with us belonging to a greater Being. One not bound to the linear reality of human experience. 14 is important not just for me, but for you as well.

^ Hope you saw my post above friend.

Here's the journal from last night/this mornings... After work, I hope to spend time in solitude and connect... But I feel a sense of Being- even now, greater than this personality we call Eric. =)

Journal entry recorded on GTC:
https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/omtalks/group-log-document-your-daily-dreams-log-only-t1618-s1695.html

Multiple dreams. I woke up three times. Once in the night from what felt like a big party- a lot of people in my house. I was a little stressed by the amount of visitors and having to keep things organized from the people coming in and out. I decided not to record this dream and instead fell back asleep. While going back to bed however, the thought occurred to me that reality is layered just like we witness these over-beings in Caseys crystal portraits. For example... this dream with a bunch of people coming in and out of my house is but a small part of a greater reality- it felt like this layer was personal, as in- my brains translation- though it could be that there was something above the minds experience happening as well. That there is a greater reality with lots of visitors. Seeing them as humans I've interacted with before, and using my house- is just one way of understanding. Not sure if I'm making sense, happy to elaborate in discussions thread.

The one thing I decided to hold on to was that I finally got to see my brain imaging from the MRI that was done. It had an activation effect. We watched it on a screen, and it started displaying the images like a slideshow. Then the screen disappeared and it became a rotating 3D model. It started going into a specific area- and with excitement and intrigue I felt my mind expanding. It would quickly highlight a portion of the brain with a flash of color, as if someone was controlling my viewing experience, and the area that would flash would expand like we were zooming in. It kept going deeper and deeper, each time we zoomed in another highlighted "segment"- it went from physical chunks of matter to empty space, thin, pieces and ultimately to a rotating rudimentary symbol. It kind of reminded me of the egyptian eye of horus but it was not.  Just that it shared similar simplistic black and rounded(cursive styled) lines. I woke up with this symbol rotating in my mind.

Last night I had the thought I'd like to visit Mt. Shasta with Gurunath.

Gurunath ended up in my dreams. We visited two separate houses, and there was a woman I was interested in who belonged with Guru. Gurunath played basketball with me. The second house was Gurunaths, he had moved. I was tasked with finding my way back on my own.

Someone has said to me; “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” I certainly believe in many of yours dear friend.

dream log
2:45 AM, 10PM bedtime. 2nd time to wake up, used restroom each time. Almost forgot about dream. Sleeping on my side like I used to is no longer easy or comfortable. Too long on left side triggers heart irregularities and sleeping on my right side creates discomfort in my right arm. The burning in the back of the neck has returned.

What I remember...
A giant metal structure... Little details, it's like a metal wall with a hole in it and something like magnets preventing people or things from entering the hole. Not much recall here... Just the distinct impression of- large, rigid, cold steel. Very ominous. Something about a truck and an extremely large truck bed.

In the scene before waking I am watching a video of people being interviewed. We discover these people have been drugged, I can't tell but it seems like for some it's against their will. One guy looks like Brad Pit and is explaining something. I forget what he says, it was a type of drug PLUS DMT for the hallucination or "added visual effects." I'm quoting the Brad Pit look alike. I am watching different people interview themselves through a webcam to share their experiences. One filipino man is talking directly to the camera, he is able to blur out the background. His girlfriend or wife implores him not to capture her on video. She is laying in bed behind him. He says he was given an opportunity to discuss and had to share his story. The man has a close shaved haircut on the side of his head. Brown skin and black hair. He begins talking about his experience. It seems he was forced to take the drugs. As he opens up he starts talking with regret. It seems the experience has left him very upset and very empty. I start to feel what he is displaying. He is overcome with emotion and starts to cry pleading to Jesus Christ before having to stop his webcam. He feels like he was disconnected from Jesus Christ and is begging God to enter his life again. He cries out to his wife for comfort. She is heart broken, I am no longer watching on a screen but am there watching the couple. He is on his knees in the bedroom floor- his wife is wearing a shirt without a bra underneath and loose gym shorts. She has tattoos on the side of her arm and on her leg. She feels for her husband and gets out of bed as he calls to her and immediately pulls him into her stomach. He is crying out for God. She doesn't know what to do except to go to the kitchen and make him food. I follow her there and am intrigued by the organization of their fridge as well as the size of it. I remember some leafy green cabbage heads or something like bok choy resting on the shelf before waking up.

As I record the dream, even laying on my back there is subtle discomfort in heart movement. 3:01AM must go back to sleep. 3:08 before submitting my internet goes out...

I finally fall back asleep and have an out of body experience. I had the option not to go out of body. I could feel the weight of this in between state. It had been a while since I've projected. I lay there just feeling the weight for a little bit. I usually start with my arms, but it was too difficult. I was so tired. I have to make my intention clear, I want to astral project. So, I pull my "body" out(astral body away from physical body) starting with my chest, shoulders and head. I sit at the edge of my bed now in my astral shell for a while. Everything is so heavy- if I go too fast I will be dizzy. It's difficult to see my surroundings. Finally I stand up and glide towards my old bedroom- I tell my self I am going to go outside. I phase myself through the window and try to fly. I see the clear sky and the stars- but as soon as I phased through, additional weight started pulling me down to the street. I think I start to dream, I decide to meet Casey and talk to her about her recent dream. She is there with another man who is not as impressed by my being there. When I do see Casey my eyes are opened wide and my head starts to buzz. I feel a type of energetic download. I tell her I find it fascinating that even in her dreams she is able to help others- which I understood as ultimately assisting your *self*/assisting consciousness. After Casey leaves I tell her guy friend that we are having this conversation out of body. It surprises even me that I am holding on to this body for as long as I have... He doesn't say anything, only raises a brow.

Then I fall into another dream, our customer John is challenging me to Golf. It feels like there is another presence observing me and weighing my soul. I for unknown reasons accept Johns challenge despite my lack of skill in the game. We are in my backyard taking practice swings- Dad is off in the distance watching us. At one point we take a wiffle ball, half it and put popcorn in it. We then lob those balls over into the neighbors yard. I miss on the first swing. With my second swing I see a rock go into her(my neighbors) backyard. I was feeling a little concerned as my awareness went from my body to slow motion zoomed in on this rock flying into the neighbors yard- nearing the edge of her house. Dreams are kind of blending here... I am also remembering two giant dogs- I don't remember if they approached me while I was having the OBE or not... The dogs belonged to a man, he wanted them to be intimidating. They were still quite young and they were extremely friendly with me. I'm not sure if the man could see me, but the dogs were definitely aware of my presence.

Now I am remembering a dream in between these two experiences about a Woman and someone of authority... It was a mission to get to her.... Was there a rescue happening???

Wake up at 7AM.

The download I had with casey and the dream experience above has a lot to do with a creative piece Casey was able to complete shortly after. I will share it here for anyone interested...
She calls it, "sovereignty made simple" https://consciousnessexploration.com/2022/05/20/sovereignty-made-simple/

Last night I dreamt I was time travelling. Here is the journal entry:
Only summary-style available... Details escape me. I'm watching an ad for Magic Island and I am realizing the video is taking place in Houston. It doesn't end in video format though, it ends with me being there. I'm with someone else, and we meet 2 people from the time period. We're in their house. Magic Island is no longer a thing in 2022. We learn the year is 1982. It's a total of 4 people- 2 from 1982 and 2 from 2022. We tell them the year we're from and we tell them what's different. I wake up- what's interesting is, when I go back to sleep the same 4 people are dreamt of and we are riding the timeline together. We run into different versions of ourselves on occasion and are constantly living the same thing in a different way. The different time period makes for slight variations. The personality is the same, but there is a minor evolution and adaption each time.

I decided to do some research into Magic Island- since I was there once as a kid.
(https://s.hdnux.com/photos/75/10/22/16024706/3/ratio3x2_2300.jpg)

What I found fascinating was how near accurate the dates were from my dream. Initially I couldn't recall if I was hearing 1992 or 1982... But my gut said 1982. Well while doing some research I discovered that Magic Island was actually built in 1983- and the first ad I found online was an advertisement dated for 1992.
Magic...
It was once a glorious place full of wonder. It was a one of a kind experience I had the privilege of going.
https://youtu.be/H5hUV3MY2yU

Now this is what it looks like inside,
(https://s.hdnux.com/photos/73/07/57/15498179/3/2300x0.jpg)

 Maybe one day it will be resurrected to its former glory. If not, that's okay too.

Steve, funny rabbits. Reminds me of Trudeaus followers in the following dream(although I am the one snarling like an animal, I assure you it was those hunting us aligned with Trudeaus beliefs who were seen as ravenous and deranged):

I have a dream that I am fighting people who serve Justin Trudeau. I remember snarling like a dog and biting someone in their neck. I have to try and bite them in order to break their spell. I specifically remember bringing my fang into their skin. Usually the neck or the shoulder. I am leading a friend away from this danger, while another friend is constantly hunting us. I see Justin himself at one point and he has convinced others they need to be corrected and in so doing they can live a happier life. That's the takeaway- is that he has begun seeking out dissidents and it seems the elders recognize it, and a majority of young people are willing to accept this type of forced authority. I remember seeing one man speaking against him after being confronted- the older man corrected Justin to help those realize he is coming after everyone, even those who aren't really involved. He is really big on... Urging followers to help "correct" world view. Dissident includes anyone who is not aligned with the "takeover."
In one scene I am forced to play dead, and it works for a while until I am finally captured. I wake up with something screwed into my right eyeball. I tell my friend it hurts and he says I'll get used to it. The implant has something to do with forcing an augmented reality, it isn't something I have the option to turn off. I am focused on the sensations and the discomfort of having a screw lodged in the side of my eye before waking up.

My dreams have been really speaking to me... Guiding me. I almost forgot about this one, I woke up asking Mom if it just happened because I was still somewhat in the dream state, only to realize it was too early and a new day. I dreamt she helped me shop around for my CT scan which had been denied by my insurance. The hospital would have wanted $2,600+ upfront in order to proceed. I dreamt of the name of the imaging facility, that they were significantly less expensive. I called them up today(not in the dream) and sure enough, I have an appointment first thing tomorrow. Hooray! 🙂 God is great.

Repeating and interesting symbols: White rose, White, Chalice, White glove, Nobility

I woke up around 3AM to a dream, my family and I were invited to a dinner party. It was a very formal setting. There were multiple round tables in something like a conference room but it had a very victorian feel to it.  I was in a chair with my back against a wall, but there was opening with people on the other side and an aisle to my right which people would walk down as they were leaving. I had a menu in my hand that had multiple pages. I could flip to the back and identify people of nobility who were attending the party. It was near the end of dinner and my family was eating dessert as party members were walking down the aisle behind me, passing me and leaving out the front. The memory in particular is a woman of royalty placing her wine glass that looked an awful lot like a chalice on my table. She put it down in front of me, but she would not make eye contact with me. Instead she placed her hand along my back and gently brushed my shoulder as she walked by. She had a white glove on and the chalice was decorated in a way it had a white rose covering. She was recognizing me without saying anything, it was a literal pat on the back a feeling like job well done. After she left I am reading the "menu" which is actually a brief synapsis of the royalty leaving the  party. A duke of some sort, I believe his name starts with an E. Edwin?? joins my family as we eat dessert. He was interested in my questions... The Duke was interested in making the place, "a nicer world." I was asking him how? And My Dad was drunkenly speaking out of turn. E put some kind of ring on that my Sister recognized was used as a way to dictate whose turn it would be to speak. Edwin? was dressed in white, and again there is a symbol of a white rose on the ring he is using to speak with. He took an interest in my question and wanted to share his world views with me... I think. The feeling of it all was a type of recognition and an earnest conversation. I am still a bit hung up on the queen- or whoever she was, leaving her glass for me as she left. There is a type of connection being made I don't quite recognize. Like a type of longing in the air. 

Went back to sleep at 4AM... This part was kind of fun- I wasn't fully asleep. I was aware of my body on the bed trying to sleep and at the same time the mind started playing out its own visuals. I was in between and started 'day dreaming' I was visiting an old friend. I told him I wasn't actually dreaming yet and went to explore past the confines of his bedroom. I saw my mind started to create cascading hallways. It seemed to go down forever. I knew I was dreaming but wasn't sure what to do from here. I was still aware of my body laying in bed. The hallways were a temporary construct with not much detail. I decided I was going to walk down, even if my mind kept building or extending more hallway. I got to a spot where it was just an empty-ish room with amazing reverberation. I started to play with (AUM) chanting om into the walls. The vibrations were very nice but this caused me to wake up.

As I started to drift back to sleep I finally was dreaming that I was helping a girl of some sort. We were escaping somewhere... And I remember I am still dreaming- a man aims his rifle at us and I tell her to accept being shot at. That we'll be fine. He shoots us both- it's kind of slow motion as the bullet is coming at me. I surrender and accept. After that I seem unphased as I wake up in another scene, with the girl and we are somewhere on a opened freight train.

There was more dreaming but I can't remember much details... Only that, I was descending into being less aware- but that this theme of exploring the dream scenery was very prominent up until waking: 7:30AM.

I dreamt I was in my original bedroom laying down to sleep- and the sun was setting. Behind closed eyes the sun was flooding my mind. It was the most beautiful sensation. Gurunath was there without form. Just that I could feel his presence and I was chanting. Aummmmmmmmm.......... Aimmmmmmmm........ Riiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggg........... Rammmmmmmmm
And each vibration sent a wonderful rush of tubular energy coercing through my spine.

I don't remember much afterwards. Just that there was indeed a party and someone was peeing discretely out the back end of their gym shorts. The second part of my dreams felt more distant and... different form the first scene. I remember we were in Thailand with my friend Matt and we went to speak to this man in charge of the party because Matt had ordered 79 cases of Tiger Beer. They were supposed to bring it out by pallets. There was an issue trying to get his money back but once we confronted the man and told him it was the Tiger beer one of his employees remembered it was in the warehouse. It was odd, how could someone lose so much beer? But there was something shady going on not being disclosed to us- and I was there to ensure Matt received proper reimbursement one way or the other.

Feels like my dream with Trudeau seeking out dissidents is pretty much spot on with the atmosphere to our neighbors in the North...
(https://media.gab.com/cdn-cgi/image/width=875,quality=100,fit=scale-down/system/media_attachments/files/107/801/119/original/f7324a1aaab20748.jpeg)

Morning of 6/7/22

I believe their names are Dudley and Ann. In one scene a Tiger has escaped and we are driving a van trying to lure our friend(the tiger) back into the vehicle. We aren't scared but concerned for our Tiger- he is a valued friend. In another scene the male and female are running together down the street, it's like a game of tag. It's night time, they are propelling each other forward. In another scene a woman revokes Dudley and Anns driver license. The woman scoffs at Ann, it is not her first time to be in trouble in this manner... And then the Woman tells Dudley she is upset with him and sneaks him a $5 and $1- $6.... She tells him she never wants to see him without proper pants again and to buy a pair- to quit goofing around and get ready for this exam, which has more to do with him passing some test and now getting his license back as well.
After Caseys channeling of a girl whose name starts with an A... After Abigail and Aya... Here is a dream with another girl with an A- and a male and female dynamic. I believe this connection for me is important as far as guidance in the dream world is concerned. The woman in the licensing office or, whatever official building it was, seemed upset like we were being reckless. I wonder if my expressing difference of opinion where politics are concerned is harming others? Or is my general, heart-on-my-sleeve personality making others uncomfortable? In the very next scene both Ann and Dudley have arrived in school and need to poop. There are two stalls. Ann is blowing the one stall up. It is noticeable by everyone in the area. She just keeps going, and there's a lot of farting too. She starts laughing, no longer embarrassed despite her initial hesitation. Dudley starts pooping in the other stall next to her(Strange). I've let too much time pass in-between to recall everything correctly. There was an important element to the Tiger and the rescue- and I don't know if dreams were superimposed or if my mind coalesced scenes as a way to try and remember. I had gotten up at one point to pee, and can't remember the dream before then... Unless the Tiger scene happened around that time?? I remember when Ann finished she used a lot of toilet paper and there was brown water.

Morning of 6/9/22

It's been really hard retrieving details lately. There's an important lesson being imparted in my first dream I think it has to do with my frame of mind from the day before- that reality is not as we perceive it. When I wake up to use the restroom, the more I try to remember- the faster it feels like an entire adventure starts to slip away.

When I go back to sleep another adventure is had- I remember being in a vehicle and getting myself lost. Highways are all over the place- in the sky, broken apart, sideways, crisscrossed... I take a wrong exit, and eventually a wrong turn. Someone from AT&T calls me and is watching me remotely as they talk to me over the bluetooth in the car. There's an incredible amount of speed and pressure being felt as I begin making a turn which causes me to drift off to the side and completely derail off the highway which is really high in the sky- my vehicle starts tumbling. I tell her I'm freefalling but there's a highway below me and I might be able to land it. I see this giant highway coming into view and other cars are also sticking the landing. By way of some miracle I too stick the landing- and the lady from AT&T watching remotely has an entire team watching like I'm in some kind of race. Some guys are telling the others I won't make it, and even though I've stuck the landing the car is still out of control- it plows through traffic and the speed is still too incredible, the car ends up backwards and racing between vehicles, causing drivers around me to spin and lose control. I finally manage to straighten it out and while this is happening another dream starts to come into focus. It's another adventure... There's a typical, "boss" character he seems kind of mobster but I can't quite hang on to the details...

The last thing I really remember is treating my old crew to Jimmy Johns subs for lunch. Someone came to collect a debt(the damage from the vehicle) while I'm with friends and my parents save me- Dad is reluctant but Mom took care of it without question. which surprises Dad. He's surprised he didn't have to lift a finger. And... lastly I remember graduating with other students in military uniform. Our squad was gifted some kind of blue ribboned necklace with a medal hanging at the end. We accomplished something unique and I think it has to do with defeating or navigating through the trial of the adventure with the mob like boss character. As I'm walking away it's like viewing a scene in slow motion, like a camera is filming us I am looking at my younger self walking by as if on a movie screen. As I walk away and off the screen my awareness goes back to first person point of view. Still in uniform a friend gifts me a tiny wooden skateboard and it feels like that race in my vehicle begins all over again. Except this time it's more for fun. I attempt riding the wooden skateboard down a series of stairs and am successfully balanced and in place. I notice at the end that I've cracked the skateboard and the bottom half breaks off- I show my friend after having attempted to ride it down another set of stairs before waking up.

There's a lot missing, so much has happened. This adventure, feels like someone was intentionally shifting my scenes around- and that I was in a type of water world. I again am feeling, layers... Different characters... I can barley see someone moving entire scenes in this world like pieces on a chess board. A type of overseer or... Cobwebs. It's so faint, but it has to do with almost everything happening within the immediate awareness... The image feels like the face of a larger than life being barley visible in gray space using psychokinesis. Argh, very frustrating.

June 10th, 2022

My friend William is overlapping with my Dad, they are separate but sometimes they are seen as the same character. William is going to make a film. President Trump and Robin Williams will be in the film. Before this happens my Dad is driving us in his vehicle along a beach. He is literally driving his car sideways on the beach at high speeds. I implore him to get on the road but he insist he knows what he's doing. He is drifting further out into the ocean, and I am getting frustrated because he is also drunk. The windows are down and the waves are bringing water in the car. I notice there are other cars drifting along the ocean shore and one kid is literally hanging off on the outside like it's a joyride, clinging on for his life but also enjoying getting wet and running through the water. It's kind of weird how dreams have been happening lately, like chunks of data are funneled in and all I have are blocks of information instead of any linear recall. So, although I recall scenes here in some sense of chronological order it's not necessarily the case. I remember flashes of information... For instance, William is looking to recruit people to finish a film. William and Dad are interchangeable characters. Dad sends me to find a girl to be in the film. I'm in some kind of ballroom, standing next to President Trump as he asks me what I'm doing. I explain we're looking for the girl we want to be on film. I am watching these girls and guys dance in a choreographed fashion, it's quite impressive. I actually remember the faces of each person I am investigating from a distance.
Dad who has now taken Williams job of making the film approaches President Trump and I and Dad is drunk. His eyes are watery red and his intelligence is clearly hindered. He doesn't have much to say and doesn't know whether or not to shake President Trumps hand. He leaves and President Trump tells me, "it's a shame." I am feeling impatience for Dads alcohol abuse. President Trump is no longer interested in finishing the film with us.
I am waiting my turn to use the restroom. Someone's in there before me. The door is locked as I try to open it. A young man comes out and I am now using the restroom. When I come back I have to tell Dad that people have basically given up on the project. But there are some very strange scenes flashing in my mind... This is like a new block of data which comes after all of the log above.

As I return to what feels like a summer-camp facility, like a Disney World/Hotel park area... I am also witnessing a Woman disappointed in President Trump. As if Dad and Trump are now interchangeable in their energy except they are still two separate people. By the end of the dream President Trump helps my Dad in unexpected ways. The Woman disappointed in Trump/my Father is dating someone else- she see's the drunkard who now happens to be President Trump, and kisses her boyfriend in front of him. She says something like, "he's probably on drugs" her boyfriend who happens to be a police officer says, "looks like fentanyl." The jealous drunk takes a child hostage with a toy gun. It's a fake gun... Okay, now President Trump looks more like Will Ferrell. Will is holding the child, and the off-duty officer is aiming a real gun at him. Will points the fake gun at the cop and it clicks, then he throws it at the cops face before running away.

While all this is happening, the deadline for the film project is becoming increasingly apparent. There's a certain pressure guiding the dreams along. I am walking outside on concrete and notice a trace amount of debris- twigs, pebbles and leaves in one area of the park are ascending slowly upwards through an invisible chute. I decide to step in this beam and I can feel my chest rising feeling very light. I am suddenly lifting off the ground and am transported to an, "upper level." Here President Trump is no longer in a drunken state but instead is playing guitar. He is surprising everyone, and he has a plain t-shirt on which looks like it was splashed with different colors of paint. The Woman who accused him... And my Mother are sharing the same energy. They are no longer in an accusatory mode but are watching the show in appreciation. Dad and the President- still, two separate realities, are also sharing some of the same energy dynamics. Dad still needing to finish the film and President Trump somehow hosting this club in the "upper level." As he is playing guitar I am getting flashes of him and Robin Williams.

I start to think of my friend William, and before I wake up it is like a happy ending to a surreal adventure... Dad finished the film, he recruited people somehow on his own.

As a personal sidenote... I know both my friend William and Dad abuse alcohol. I have witnessed them in waking life act in ways where I was either embarrassed by the behavior or have lost patience. It's not to judge, I have been embarrassingly drunk before too. But I don't talk to William much anymore, only because we aren't keeping in touch. We were more high school friends(years ago). His Father told me he submitted himself to a rehab facility... And last night I snapped at Dad for behaving childishly. We made amends quite easily, but it was not fun in the moment. I think a lot of this is being played back to me in last nights dream... And apparently William is coming through, he may be thinking about me in some way or I, him. The name Will is very heavy in these dreams, so I wonder if there's some unresolved emotions between us. Maybe I need to reach out? Or maybe I just need to notice what's being imparted? Also strange that I have recurring celebrities to relay particular emotions or messages back to me. It's also becoming apparent that my recall these last couple of days comes in blocks and is more like a whirlwind of information than solid linear recognition. Hmm...?

4:15am waking up to pee.

I'm on some kind of bus and have to get off to use the restroom. The bus pulls over then leaves. I have my last name on my shirt. I see my Dad as a younger man working for some kind of auto-shop. This is like an internship or a part time job for being a service writer. It's an in-between job before he has chosen his career. He doesn't know I'm his son yet but we both have moustaches- I walk up to him as he's leaving his shift... Dad is young and in shape. "Excuse me," I tell him.... "Can I show you something?" He slows down but doesn't stop walking. I show him the last name on my shirt- and I point to his last name on his shirt. "Pretty cool huh?" He keeps walking.

My friend Chase comes up to me and ask, "what are you doing?" I tell him, "It's okay, I don't think he made the connection." Although a part of me thinks he realized I am somehow related to him, he never stopped to realize I am his son. Chase seemed concern that this would disturb some aspect of our time-traveling adventure/field trip.

I'm somewhere else now... With a bunch of old high school acquaintance's and friends from past jobs. We're outside in some rest area... A girl is "interviewing" me... As I am sitting next to another girl. She ask if I'm dating the girl next to me. She has strawberry blonde hair. The girl answers for her, "we've tried that before." But she doesn't seem upset in anyway, it seems like we're friends. The girl ask me again, "so are you dating her?" I say, "I wouldn't mind trying again." which pleasantly surprises the girl. She sits closer to me and is really happy.
 
(I can't believe I almost forgot all of these details, including the time traveling aspect of visiting my Dad... But as I came to write what I *did* remember, the above journal automatically popped back into my head. Below is what I remembered upon waking)

I'm witnessing a few of these friends from the past playing a handshake game of some sort. It involves slapping each others hands, intentionally causing stinging sensation on the skin. Someone's keeping points. The people circled around the contestants count it down and sing, "Tres.... Aba- De" Each syllable is a slap to the other persons hand. Two people stand apart and in front of each other like you would arm wrestling. Someone is speaking spanish of some sort and counts down until they say GO- the audience begins to sing and with the word "Tres" each contestant slaps and grabs the others right hand. Then they descend, taking the left hand underneath the right and slapping it as hard as they can to the sound "Ah" letting go of the right hand, bringing it under the left and slapping the others(hand) to the syllable "ba"- then releasing the left grip and quickly moving under the right hand slapping the final sound "De." They repeat this "Tres Aba De" Which repeats the descending handshake/slapping game. Each syllable is met with a slap to the other persons hands.

It's my turn to play as the score keeper calls me into the circle and pairs me up against someone else. Some fuzzy memory here of the person I'm being paired up against. It feels like we're in a specials needs group as we try to understand the game. 

I woke up dreaming of the song To Build A Home. It was the instrumental version,
https://youtu.be/6PJ0Oxjc1v4
I dreamt I was still in the past. I remember swimming in a pool with jellyfish. We tried extricating the jellyfish out of the pool. Someone hosted us for dinner. I tried to explain to the guest that we were from a future timeline, sometime around 7PMish we were expected to disappear... It happened before. Except we didn't disappear right away which created further doubt in my friends mind. The time era was something like 1970's?

I am with two other people and we are confronted by a larger than life angry turtle. He's considered a God. It's at least 20 feet tall. The person next to me tells me he's going to stare at us into our eyes, and I thought he said we were supposed to stare back. He goes down the line, first the two people I am with and then me. I remember yellow eyes, at first I kept my eyes open and blank- not staring into his eyes... But I wasn't sure if I was supposed to stare into his eyes. So I did. I could feel all of his anger when I did, but the idea was that I was not challenging him.
Afterwards the image of something like a slot machine lines up in my minds eye- we somehow passed this turtles angry stare test and won a million dollars. 👺🐢💸

Journal entry from 6/21/22

I'm constantly undergoing genetic transformation and am being made stronger. I remember a testing ground and the thing is, with each experiment my memory is supposed to be wiped clean- only it isn't. Some of the transformations are quite torturous and I remember 'waking up' a whole lot faster during the second 'trial run' which was designed to test my strength. I used the newfound strength to seek out those who are sending people through these dangerous and uncomfortable situations. I remember sharp and excruciating pains. I remember seeing a dead child. I make way to the top of a ship to find I've challenged a woman who kept me in this charade of a character because I was once her friend. Apparently before all of these experiments I was originally a woman and we were both in command of this extremely large ship. It took multiple people to oversee its momentum. When I confronted her I was, who I am today, as a man... but there is a vague flash of my previous life where she is forced to show me we once knew each other because I am hunting the people who have been hurting me. This causes a pause in the dream.

There are more details, more characters and more adventure I am having a hard time remember.

i had a really cool hypnagogic experience after trying to go back to sleep... i'm in the room i'm in now.... laying on my back and my head resting to the right. i dont yet make the distinction i am already out of my body, as i am preoccupied with the in-between sensations. i know i'm out of body because my vantage point is not on the mattress i'm sleeping on but on the floor beside it. my eyes are half-opened and i see a silver and black spider as large as my face resting along my mattress. i try not to disturb it, it's gently moving. i notice a little brown around the black. i begin to feel the weight associated with sleep paralysis. i breathe deep and hear my breath...the weight from this sends me further.... each breath is like the most rewarding therapeutic sensations running along my spine. at this point i still don't realize i'm out of body. i begin to hear chatter like over a radio. i hear the name putin. i return my awareness to my breath, feeling as if i'm going even deeper. i again look through eyes half opened and realize i am in my bedroom but it is all white. there are translucent cobwebs- conceptual framing and bright white light all over and white sheets and mattress for my bed. there's a skeleton in my bed. i believe i am in the past, and for some reason i tell my self... "not yet" like i'm in the wrong time era. it's as if the breath is shifting planes and time. i then hear a woman try to say my name, except she says "erin" and she says it very clearly to me. "close" is what i say knowing my name is actually eric. i immediately wonder who is calling me. all of this is happening in an instant and i break the spell by trying to go out of body from here, again not realizing i am already out of body. by the initial "push" (trying to push my astral body out mistaking it for the physical body) the awareness returns back to my physical body, the weight slowly disappears and i open my eyes realizing i am now correctly on my mattress above the ground.

darn, i wonder... because i was starting to realizing some things while in this state... had i not tried to project- how much further could i have taken it?

She says “Erin”

“Close I say” (Eric quote) it’s good you have sense of humor in altered states! Maybe 🤔 somebody is attempting to suggest you’ve got it in you Eric! Bring it out more often! Sometimes we just have to have a sense of humor with ourselves and I have had God and Guru laugh at me and with me. I’m ok with it. Ha ha yea I’m glad if God pays attention to me enough to make jokes about me. Think of it … to get God’s attention even by making you or me the butt of his joke!!!


Wow what a concept! Yet I have found it true. Or maybe I shouldn’t flatter myself. It might have just been one of his emissaries  carrying out some pranks to get me to lighten up. I’ve witnessed that as well.

Thanks Steve, that you find it humorous makes me laugh too.  :)

I had to look up who the actor was but apparently I am David Spade. In this dream there is a wealthy man (David Spade) and a gorgeous, exaggeratively attractive 17 year old girl. The girls Mother is trying to get David to commit some kind of sexual act with the girl. David finds her attractive but is, for whatever reason, setting the family up- leading them on only to attempt to expose the Mother and the girls true intentions. Through out the scene there are really exaggerated images where sexual tension is concerned- the Mother is highlighting the girls breast to David. There is some blue material around her breast. And later, after this garage scene- the girl herself puts water on her crotch so that it's slightly visible with her tight pants. This is when the urge to consummate is most apparent. David wants to have sex but knows she is too young. Somehow this girl ends up becoming his assistant- even after he exposes her. I remember this, "gotcha moment" that involved her image painted on the garage- which had more to do with revealing to the public the Mothers attempts to force this girl into Davids life. I'm not sure how, but that's what the feeling was. Maybe it was revealing something caught on a security camera... I don't know... But I remember now moving forward in life and David- or... myself, am older and looking for what used to be the 17 year old girl... I'm at some kind of help desk asking about her... If he wants help from anybody, he wants it to be her. She was fun, and willing- and the sexual tension was great. But now this girl is wealthy and somewhere else. This whole Mother urging her to be in his life had something to do with securing the girls wealth and creating potential blackmail.

In a later dream... I'm in a reality where I shouldn't be- in a house I shouldn't be in... I'm actually somewhere upstairs when my Mother and Sister recognize a foreign element(me) and they begin searching the house for an intruder... I am trying to sneak around without being caught, looking for a way out. Somehow I meet a man that might be another version of my self and he is leading me to a smaller house out back with a freezer. There's an invisible portal in which he goes through by walking into the freezer. I am being told to catch up as my Mother and Sister are about to catch the me that does not belong in this reality- so I follow him through the portal. Now I am in another reality where I am an adult but stuck in this body that is a much younger version of my self. In this version of reality I am actually the younger sibling and we(my family) are still together. I realize a lot of time is spent here and there are odd moments where the people in that reality start to question a foreign element(my being there)- as if i am too smart for a child of my age. Not book smart or anything, but one that shows having the mind of an adult. This child version of me has been training my Sister, preparing her for something... I am guiding her to success, discretely explaining the nature of reality- leaving all kinds of secrets and hints knowing I am to depart from the childs body soon. One hint is in some game room where I've written something out in code(using key phrases or statements only her and I can understand) explaining that there is a portal in the freezer which would allow her to travel to other versions of reality.

That's all I can remember before waking up.

https://youtu.be/oCEZC9w5cMc

Thanks Steve for the continued laughs.  :D hope this fine day finds you well.

Last nights dream recall:
Golden tubular energy, timeless state
More time travel??? I remember barley perceptible golden light as a stream of tubular energy. A group and my self discovered that by standing inside it, time was happening outside of it. We were in this field experimenting. I believe there was an option to "reverse" time as well. I can't remember much more... Just that I was with a class by the end of the dream, we were in groups of two and there were many of us. We were tasked with- something, again involving time travel. Like a challenge, and a game. I told my partner that our strategy would be to go after the group behind us not next to us. By the time I was putting my shoes on a woman signaled it was time. I went for the group behind us... G1? And they were gone, all that was left was blue pineapple on this persons desk. I was concerned about who would take whatever I left behind- thinking, at least I left no valuables. And I also remember having to do this kind of work in long shifts... 12 or 13 hour shifts.

I remember few details... I had a dream with Lauren and we were talking about our kiss. I think maybe she is expecting me to make the moves in our relationship since we've tried before and agreed to keep things at a friendship level.
I am with my childhood friend Sammy and we are about to go out and explore the town- I find an old viet shop and tell Sammy and whoever else is in the car to stop- that this is the place to try. I see Melissa there eating a meal. I remember Sammy's little brother Andrew is somehow at the restaurant with us. Sammy doesn't really want to be there, he is upset that we did not go to the doughnut shop- apparently the original plan was to go to voodoo doughnuts. He doesn't want to hear my recommendation- but his brother gets something I recommend and I give his brother high praise.  The food is great.
After the meal we prod around and discover the chef is blind. There is also vague detail but it seems like the cooks(male and female) of this shop are intent on capturing children. There is some kind of evil ritual taking place behind the scenes. Here the dream is experienced in dual layers- there is something happening at the surface level, and there is another world happening beneath. I stumble upon this other world by accident, and the guy hosting it says these rituals used to be darker or scarier- now they're nicer to their victims and the process is less painful and more automated. I don't remember how but my being there helped expose a type of mass programming, like a type of hypnosis which by the end of the dream was successfully dispelled.

i'm viewing through the eyes of a woman and child. we are on the run, there is a motorcycle gang chasing us through out the dream. the man leading the charge is hulk hogan. i kind of remember an entire group of people being accused and i told the police figures i would take responsibility if they let everyone else go. we were being disproportionately charged for stealing something like sour patch kids(candy). i am constantly being hunted by people in the hundreds. i wake up to use the restroom and when i go back to sleep im put in the same dream. i am cornered in some house. the women chasing me are tired of hogans direction thinking his leadership has continually left them dry. a girl gets some counterintel that makes her believe she's been on a wild goose-chase. they say all of this not knowing im hiding in this house where they are arguing. except hogan knows im close when he finds a well crafted cocktail made on the bar left untouched. he somehow knows i made it for my self in the midst of this exaggerated pursuit. i finally decide to face them and i'm no longer viewing through the eyes of anyone but my self. i jump over some fence, charge at a line of people anticipating me- i do some motion with my hands and shoot them forward sending an extremely powerful gust of wind at the 4 or 5 people lined up horizontally. this causes them to knock back as i run and jump over their heads.
i wake up to the neighbor hammering something outside.
(https://www.sescoops.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/Hulk-Hogan.jpg.optimal.jpg)

I remember some kind of repeating contest where my German teacher would tell me I've won. I wasn't even that good at German. I drew a lot of unwanted attention this way... Some people were really coming after me. There was also a girl that really wanted to win. I decided to let the people coming after me go for it- so that the girl may win. She missed her first chance so I tried getting her to do her performance again and people started to notice. She was great. She was happy. There is a scene where I embrace her, and despite being in public, decide to consummate. It was great, there was a rush of energy between us. She liked it, but was also pulled towards her performance and having to choose- something.

I am also remembering the same people that were coming after me drugged me and put me under. They replaced my fingerprints, they modified my eyes. I specifically remember some kind of black paint for the fingerprints which got on my hands. As the drugs were wearing off I remember seeing the guy who was modifying my body make some kind of snarky remarks- it seemed like I was going to have to rediscover my true identity after they finish forcing surgical modification. They even attempted to alter my memories.

I am in a class like setting with my old high school friends. Brian is there, he is upset with me- he finds a post I made online and thinks it has something to do with him. He gets very frustrated and starts reading the post aloud- highlighting this aspect of me to our old friends group. He tries to poke fun- I can tell he is upset so I confront him. I ask him what he's doing and if he has a problem to talk to me in private about it. He doesn't do anything when I confront him. I tell him, if you're mad why don't you hit me? I send him his anger right back, and he freezes up and doesn't do anything. Instead he hires a hitman. It starts with our old car sales GM- Wally. I am "clocking out" of school like a job now and Wally is off in the distance taunting me. "Eric downloads porn!" He is trying to say something to get my attention in front of everyone outside. I ignore him and he continues to taunt me. After the failed attempt a second man approaches me. I explain to the second man I understand Brian sent him- that Brian is upset. The man tries following me around with some kind of recording device but the device fails after I've highlighted to him I understand why he's there and what he's doing. He gives up his effort to the third hitman. As they shift roles someone is asking me our relationship with Brian. Brian is there and says we're gay lovers. I look at him absurdly and wonder why he's saying that- he's also saying it in a way to try and embarrass me. When Brian is done trying to explain everything away- I get my chance to share my view, that we were friends working through difficult times. That I'd like to be friends but that I'm not interested in Brians assumptions. For some reason my explaining this to Brian causes an emotional release like peace had been established. I feel like a burden has been released. However, the third hit man starts covering me in vacuum sealed plastic. I am pleading to God as the man starts cutting off my breathing until Brian in the last minute calls off the hit and the plastic is removed from me. I remember the sensation of losing consciousness from being choked out.

the first dream I cut off, and consequently don't remember as much.

later i dreamt i was somewhere with such beautiful scenery. it was definitely a dreamscape, looking like a cross between brazil and ireland. there were these little islands with cities, with railways shooting up in the sky, and submerging down in the water. there were hills and waterfalls, lots of green, coves and rocks. a blend of old and new, industrial and also a bunch of homes or cities. my minds eye got a panoramic view and it was so beautiful.

i also dreamt i was playing basketball against a childhood friend jessica and was making 3 pointers.

then the best part of my dream, brenda was with me. we were at the airport with my family. brenda wasn't going to come because she doesn't like being there with my entire family. she had to focus on some kind of presentation. my sister was somehow stuck on my fingernail and i kept trying to separate us so i could be with brenda, who sat just across from us. i finally removed our connection and she told me it hurt her, both of us were missing part of our finger after doing so- and she went to mom and dad, she tried getting dad to be angry with me. brenda was just rolling her eyes working on her presentation- once i was free i went over to be with brenda. as weird as it sounds i started to play with her, she got on my back like a piggy-back ride(imagine if you will a woman 10 years older than me, a lawyer. that's brenda my last gf, yes we are playing like children in the airport). she is actually loving it. suddenly we feel so connected. i remember telling her i'm going to stand up now, and i stand up with her on my back. rock her side to side, run down and run up. we're smiling. my family is actually smiling a little bit too, they think i'm really goofy and strange, but find whatever happening to be nice- and it gave everyone a break from all their fighting.
i woke up smiling feeling like i got to spend a genuine moment with her again.

Have you stopped seeing Brenda Eric?

Yes we separated a long while ago. I suppose there's still some unprocessed emotions. It was a pleasant experience with her in my dream.

It is good when you can appreciate others who have gone out of your life and what the relationships meant for both of you.

I spend the first portion of my dream trying to find my room. These are special rooms reserved for wealthy people. Like luxurious dormitory. 17181762(When I tried to recall the room number there was clicking happening in my head) My room number is something like this. It's by 7's. I'm on the wrong side of the hall entirely. I manage to find rooms off by one number. 17181763. And somehow it's wrong. Everything here is very fancy, really tall doors and a special wood. Even my key is like a Mercedes key fob that you can talk to and it responds. A woman ends up helping me find my room, she tells me it's on the East side of the highway, we're on the west and by a completely different interstate.

We finally make it to my room. I'm wearing really nice clothes, they don't belong to me. Now that we've made it I remind the people I'm with that we have a dinner with a friend planned. No one wants to go anymore, so I take the car to meet my friend Braden. We're meeting for korean bbq. I'm driving a really nice car, it doesn't belong to me. None of this stuff belongs to me. I'm wearing a comfortable dark green shirt, slacks and dress shoes. The car is kind of navigating itself. We get there, and I am with one other person. I introduce him to Braden, Braden didn't bring his wife Anna.

There is a later scene where I am jumping out of an airplane. It's my first time, we're skydiving. I'm with a gentleman guide. My parachute is on a line which will pull itself. They tell me to jump out, I don't hesitate. I'm tumbling and freefalling in the sky. I'm scared but enjoying it. I begin to think its been a while and my chute still hasn't gone off. It finally goes, I look up and I see the chute above me. I feel safer and I start laughing. I look at the scenery below me and I am in wonder. I just keep laughing holding on to the sides of my chute.

When we land we begin a covert mission. We're told to steal some artifacts. I don't want to steal anything. This doesn't please the guide. Except, the stuff he wants us to steal feels like my stuff. I'm looking at a fancy sword, a bow and arrow and a decorated knife in a sheath. I take these items feeling like they were rightfully mine all along. As we get back the fun comes to an end there's a man asking my guide questions about me. The guide explains I belong to one of these ancient tribes and explains to the man I didn't want to take anything. We're kind of in a quarantined section of what feels like a ship. It's just me, the guide and this nefarious man. We're sitting in the dark in front of a hologram. The guide activates the hologram and is showing the man the past I belong to. I don't feel like we're all speaking the same language. I feel more like the level of a caveman in comparison. The nefarious man wants to take me away, the guide feels bad but is listening to this man. I remember seeing the hologram like a movie and it showed us at the beginning of our creation, a completely different form. It showed a type of dance like a war and it showed me holding onto an older man. There was some unresolved business between us and I suddenly felt a calling to complete, something. I felt like I belonged somewhere else. The nefarious man has seen enough and I am left in a stupor feeling like I am not where I belong.
There's something more here, something important, something I need to discover- they all want to discover, but the guide doesn't want to just give this(me) away... The other man demands it and the guide does what he's told. Still there's some kind of secret not being relayed... I can't remember, just that there is a traumatic scene here before I wake up.

i had an OBE. pushing out of my body was relatively easy. i walked out my bedroom. my dad was a little curious as to what he was witnessing from his bed. i went outside in the backyard. suddenly i was in a sitting position like in a chair and started propelling myself up to the sky. i felt no fear, i tried going to the stars. i was like a rocket. i saw a shooting star on my way up and out towards space. it was blue star-dust. things started to shake and vibrate intensely. the stars started to blur. i never get into space anymore. i tried and tried, determined. instead i woke up in another bedroom. i slithered out of body. i walked around the house and then woke up. as i lay in bed i realized the second OBE was a dream and felt fake. i realize i have to pee but i don't want to miss another opportunity. i lay there for a while before surrendering to the urge to pee and force myself out of bed.

as i fall back asleep i dream my family and i are all out in someone elses yard laying down in the grass. im throwing the ball for juno my girl dog. i throw it into the neighbors tree, it is a small shrub like tree next to the front of their house. juno gets herself tangled up in it as she retrieves the ball. my sister appears younger than she is. she is a child in this experience. she feels bad that we're in the neighbors yard just doing our thing. she gets herself up and knocks on the neighbors door. a man in a suit answers. she explains to him that our dog is here and got stuck in his tree. that she's sorry but she doesn't want to cause a commotion. the man replies something like, "i guess we don't have to shoot anyone then." strange...  before this dream comes to an end, i tell my sister she was right to listen to her intuition. it feels like i am telling her this from a distance, and like the words are being typed and represented on a computer screen...

in the next dream casey is there. she later turns into this african american man. he is asking for an instrument of mine. all i have is this long double layered kalimba and chrome paintbrushes. he takes the paintbrushes and strokes them against the kalimba keys. the sound produces the most wonderful and beautiful music i have ever heard. it doesn't sound like a kalimba it sounds like a violin. he's reading off a sheet of music and playing this amazing drawn out melody. my soul is moved by such delicate and ambient sounds. he hands me the chrome paintbrushes. i don't know how to read the music and ask him how he did that. he disappears and i am left with the kalimba. i try to recreate the experience and i am impressed i am actually making music. casey re-appears and tells me  it sounds like a melody she has heard before. i tell her i made it up on the spot. then i hear it again and say i can see how she hears so and so as a melody. i am really loving the violin/kalimba experience.

ps... there was a dream in between these two that i can not quite recall. just that it was its own separate adventure with my friend javier.

i had a dream that feels more like a culmination of events right before sleep. i was posting at the portal, discussing politics. i didn't know joe biden gave a speech the other day. i read about it, more so peoples reactions to it. naturally my dream feels more like the last few things i did were put in a smoothie blender to create whatever it was i dreamt.

i dreamt my friend steve was tired, like maybe i was draining him on his forum.
and i also dreamt that a portion of the US was covered in, "engulfing flames" with fighter jets flying out of the scene.

We are faced with many troubling world issues that could boil into what your dream images portrayed; especially since we know some of the Masters have warned of a great challenge to the earth plain in the next three years. I would comment more, although my comments have potential political implications.

Feel free to carry the conversation on here or elsewhere. This is just a journal, and I realize it is a help to have because it shows varying subjects within. Like attitude, subconscious workings, astral projection, lucid dreaming, barley dreaming, memory and recall. Prophetic mind and mechanical mind. And so much more. Of course, we have differences of political opinion. Yet it's as you've said, meanness isn't a quality specifically tied to one party or political affiliation. Neither is kindness.

As I've said, it's actually a blessing to know people on such opposite spectrums of the pendulum called God. It's all God. Most folks forget that and start taking things super personal and suddenly people fail to live to another's expectations, even if that other is unaware they had expectations. But there's no fault for this. It's what happens when you dance with truth.

Truth is all there is, and we're having a personal experience with it. Which means we may not be on the same page all the time. And such is the reason for war.
Whatever your political beliefs, they're just that. Beliefs. Subject to change. I may disagree wholeheartedly, but that doesn't mean I need to be mean to you. So again, feel free to carry on your thoughts here or elsewhere. Or, feel free to keep thoughts to your self- if that's what you wish. Whatever you decide, I am indifferent.

I welcome your opinion as long as you refrain from throwing out petty insults, which is something we've both been guilty of in our relationship with each other.

Kind regards ~  :)

A practice I try to engage in and a belief I would like to live out...

I just want to love, especially women in a intimate sense. Whoever comes I want to give my all. If they go, I will move on and keep loving. It's not always easy to move on. So when I get in funks I try to remember all the qualities of the other person I loved, rather than the qualities that created toxicity. In this way there's an element to "us" and to the other person that is admirable. Holding the admiration in my mind is far more rewarding than looking at the world through a lens of anger and mistrust.

It may be that I forget misdeeds, and may be that I have to learn them again... But for now, in the present, I would rather be smiling than crying. LOL  :)

Your words are not comprehensible unless you give examples. I really do feel at times I need to watch you and your posts because they are only the opinion of one person and their reality.

Well Steve, it just means you feel you've done nothing to insult me. But to dredge through the muck of our unsavory past as we try to create peace now is not something I'm interested in doing. Not that I can't, "prove it" but that maybe it's just not as important as the attitude we share now, together.

Put a little ginger in that smoothie! You must know by now; I like you too much to tell and too little to know.

https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/11-proven-benefits-of-ginger

I dreamt I met Amma the hugging Saint. She had a small group of people around her, we were at a poor hotel by the beach. I had walked off and around a corner, seeing all kinds of people coming out of their doors. It was spaced out. I remember pillars- grays and ambient light. The energy was "sparce" and then I stumbled upon Amma sitting down outside under some shade with just two other people behind her. I walked up to speak to her. She told me, she knew I was praying to God asking what I was doing wrong. She told me she's seen something like this before and there was something I needed to get out of my system. She gave me a time limit and told me to return to her as soon as possible. I can't remember if either by the end of the day- or the next. She said I needed to fulfill this experience- like Life had become routine or stale and it was turning me mad. I had been wandering. It was a desperate moment, even Amma looked concerned. 

I then dreamt somehow I ended up in a room where I was playing electric guitar very loudly. There was a man there helping me play, we were jamming. We both seemed kind of out of it. Like we were having an out of body experience. And I kept playing, there was so much music and noise coming out of this room. And the lighting was dark, there was like a strobe effect of white and green light and light smoke swirling around the room. I just kept playing even while the man was talking to me. All the way up until I told the man the guitar was out of tune. He bent the tip of a guitar pick and started testing it with me- he pushed the guitar pick so hard into the neck of the guitar against one of the strings he snapped the string. He pulled out the string and told me he'd replace it.

I woke up having to pee.

I had some dreams after falling back asleep but can't remember too well... I did not practice recalling. I would also add the concern from Amma felt like she cared about me. If it wasn't for Steve I never would have sent my self to Dallas to visit her. These saints seem to bring out dreams or unique experiences the night before and during. I've dreamt of Anandamayi Ma, Two different Amma's and Gurunath. All saints I have met in person. I am fortunate for their care and guidance, even if I'm just passing by.

And to add the sensation of playing guitar in my dreams is so familiar. It's not the first time either. Strumming the strings and then playing individual strings- it was very therapeutic and rewarding.

frozen tundra, possessed gorilla, something in-between, friend making films

before sleep i prayed to god asking for clarification. i understand the dream is somehow a reflection of my attempts to clean deeply rooted undesirable behaviors.

i dreamt of a frozen tundra and going down into something like a cellar. it was cold, lots of snow. below i found a possessed or zombified gorilla. it was angry and making a mess of things.

somewhere in my subconscious is this zombie gorilla. i have impulses that have become hijacked by forces outside myself. (gorilla/possession/zombification). i pray i overcome and make the truly desired changes.

after this i wake up. when i fall back asleep i dream of my friend sean c pursuing his interest in making film. but before this there is another dream that is harder to recall.

i dream i am in a hotel. i dream i was once something like a ceo who has been cast out by his peers who now believe they are in charge. there's bullying, childish games. i seem to remember something about a debt being paid. i also remember a scene outdoors with a 4-wheeler.

the hotel, i am moving from one area(a place for poorer clients) to another(a place with rich clients). i do not stay in the place with rich clients and am recognized by someone who seems to be spying on me as out of his element. i am doing my own bit of sneaking around here, i can't recall why.

i later dream i am playing a video game with someone? they come with me on the 4-wheeler. someone, somewhere was punched in the face. the details are scattered, the scenes are washing away into a vortex of wakefulness.

the dream with sean c, is like i am watching him. he grew his beard out, he has a homepage that looks action packed. it is strange because he is standing in front of a pink background in a quaint living room with nicely organized furniture and curious decor. it's very feminine and nanny like, and sean is contrasting it with his rugged expression- a bald head, dark shades and a beard. i am reverse engineering this scene and realizing the homepage is a part of his shortfilm, it's like a camera follows him from one room to this, which is where he ends up. it's an action scene in which i am able to play in reverse, forward and freeze as i continue to work through it.

i get the feeling i am being offered an opportunity to help him pursue his greater desires in regards to film. at least i am, for whatever reason, an observer. i watch another one of his films and realize he used one of our jokes and made a film about it. it makes me smile like it's a great honor. it's really dorky humor but the scene entails two cowboys on horseback with megaphones in their hands, talking to one another through the megaphones and talking to the insects crawling in front of them on the megaphones. it's strangely entertaining.

i wake up.

Wooden Logs and OBE

I dream of large wooden logs headed right for a house resting at a cliff surrounded by a beach. I push my head out of the entire scene and warn the environment to the best of my ability that a gigantic pile of lumbar is about to crash into this house.

Later I have the opportunity for an OBE. It happens twice. It was easier to get out of body. I could even stand in the environment and breathe. It was a beautiful sensation, just standing there. I had no urge to push myself through the door or go outside. I just wanted to bathe in the sensations. I did get the thought to levitate. I tried, I raised my astral body up to my tippy toes. I thought I was going to- then suddenly I started to descend. I fell back into my body. It was the feeling of prolonged falling like I was further away from my physical body than understood- or like I was having to sink deeper into the physical shell than realized. It was a unique sensation but by the time it was over I thought, "that's not so bad" and even enjoyed it. I was a little sad it all came to an end. 

A dream: a glitch in the matrix
An OBE: Lei Fong and Cabal infiltration

Questions- answers? More questions.

Just a couple days ago I had an OBE. I didn't do anything but practice exiting the body and stood there. Just breathing in the atmosphere was a pleasant sensation. I got to try it twice in one night. I wonder... Since I haven't mastered this by Will power... Was I being prepped for tonights experience??? Thanks for taking the time to read and provide any feedback... I have further questions at the end of this.

I had a really interesting dream before the actual OBE so I will share that as well...

The dream,

a little girl learns about a real "glitch in the matrix."

it's similar to the movie. it starts with dejavu, except this dejavu is the exact thing repeating itself(a glitch in the matrix) and a hologram collides into a wall like a wave. here the matrix waits to receive input from the person who observes the glitch and if it's acceptable is played out.

the girl observes this glitch on two "men in black" and is hiding behind a wall which seems to shield her from the mens view. she rewrites the script and tries to change the fate of these men, which would involve killing one of them. the man who taught this girl about the glitches arrives to the scene since she unintentionally pings her location by trying to change something so dramatically. he ends up killing the men himself and the bullet which was a product of the rewrite from the girl standing behind the wall is frozen and sent back towards the girl. the man rushes towards her in a brilliant burst of light and breaches this invisible wall. here, in slow motion, the girl is exposed unto the scene and her eyes flash violet once she is drawn out from hiding. the man warns her not to fuck around again or it means losing her own life. she is scared

the scene changes like i am pulled out from wherever i was and put back on a lower density. i am observing an aerial view of a city street at night. ironically the building in focus is a chrome art studio called, "digaf" (do i give a fuck) next to a mattress or "snooze" store. it is somehow highlighted that people work in the mattress store and they practice the art of sleeping or- sell sleep to people. . .?

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So... Before going to bed I asked God in prayer what I'm doing wrong. Presently I am pursuing a woman of interest who is showing me reciprocation but is in no rush with being intimate. My whole reason for pursuing is to be intimate as it is a part of how I express my interest and share my heart and joy. So this is a learning curve for me... Since I haven't had much experience with dating. I don't really date around- things have always just happened and I tend to focus my energy in the one invested interest. Anyways... So I pray and ask to be shown what I'm doing wrong... I pray for clarification and ask God what he thinks about my relationship with this girl. Are these answers to my prayers? I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not.


Now the OBE- with something that has never happened before... A golden statue appeared in my backyard. It was terrifying- it was amazing. It was a statue but it was alive. It changed shapes. Despite rain the sun was shining on it and it didn't get wet.

Here's the details to the best of my ability- they started fading even during the experience.

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After falling back asleep I had an OBE. There are too many details to recount. I managed to catch the last few. It started with going downstairs towards my Dogs, they were happy to see me. I knew I was out of body and they saw me all the same. Many dream like concepts were playing out during the OBE, like I was having both an astral experience in my house while separately dreaming things and details about my family around me. I could dive in either experience. For example, I remember everyone in my house being awake- the lights on upstairs with April on the phone for a job interview- me drinking her water in the kitchen and being disgusted she had cheese inside the water bottle? I tried focusing on the OBE and not the dreams swirling around me. I went outside with the dogs to play in the backyard. Once in the backyard the dogs were playing with each other- it went from raining to a bright sun. In the center of the backyard was a golden statue. There is no golden statue in my backyard. It was as frightening as it was beautiful. Dreams and details were continuing to swirl around me. Like I could feel a part of me still in my bedroom and see a light in my peripheral from the perspective of my room(despite being in the backyard). I thought there was a nonexistent lamp on in my room. I am recalling in flashes now. Every time I glanced at the statue- it changed shape, but still a golden statue with the sun shining down on it. It became two things- and my dogs, tumbling and playing about- turned into the two entities portrayed by the statue. I look up and the statue changed again... From two siblings, to two friends... To one tall and one short... to Brothers and Soldiers... The dogs had become all these things. Lastly it became a Mother and Daughter- to focus on the child.
It was weird because off to the side was rain and dark clouds... But the statue was, surreal and without rain- without clouds. And the dogs became the last thing the statue showed me... I had to have met a being of some sort...
"This is Lei Fong" It said to me. We weren't speaking English- but telepathically?
Last of the dynasty...? A cabal has infiltrated their people... A great war has been relayed to me. They are desperate for help. I am being offered to accept this child in my lineage. Along accepting her I am promised certain- spiritual gifts... ? It's all starting to fade now... Somehow I start retracting back to my physical body... But before ending the experience- A larger aspect of my self pulled through the entire scene- like I was secretly watching in the background. And my voice in a way I never heard it before said,
"How do I know?"

I wake up...


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So... I never met whoever was talking to me. I could not see what they looked like. I just know I was visited. The language was a type of telepathic communication. It was a lot of information to be spoken in english but I understood it in english. This great war was more like an infiltration. Like they were presently being destroyed- a cabal has infiltrated their ship? Entities physically dying around me. This was a desperate plea for help. And I am being shown this child. This child is the key to preserving their dynasty. I am being asked to accept this offer and it begins to feel like a trade- like I will be rewarded some kind of gift. My intuition or higher-self is stand-offish. What they're showing me feels real. But I am hesitant. And as a higher authority within myself stepped forward ending the OBE... "How do I know?" Was said in the most powerful way I can't express it. Like it either chased off deceit or it was meant to be a question to remember. I think Lei Fong was the name. I know they specifically used the word Cabal.

The statue had such an interesting feel I've never experienced that before. Am I being deceived? Are these answers to my prayers? Do I accept the offer? Do I help? Why would I be tempted with spiritual gifts? This dream feels important.

During this astral experience I had three points of awareness. One point was observing first person interacting with the dogs and noticing the statue in the backyard. Another point was peering into the dream data swirling around me and simultaneously could see my body back in bed. A third point was another aspect of my self stepping into the scene asking "How do I know" with such authority and ending the experience.

It is interesting to note we can have multiple points of awareness in the astral fields.

What is also interesting is the dream data I dived into. In the dream data I saw my Sister in our home. She was on the phone for a job interview- in the dream I drank a bottle of her water and was disgusted by the cheese in it.

Now... Tonight.
My Sister came to visit us by surprise. I did not know she actually had a job interview scheduled for today. She came by the house to talk about it with us. It was rescheduled. Separately our fridge has been getting stinky. We thought something died in there. Well... Randomly my Sister went to the fridge earlier in the night. She found the culprit of the disgusting smell. It was cheese she left in the fridge!

I think I am starting to find a reason as to why I felt this dream and OBE to be of some importance. Yesterday my Sister came and pretty much the data retrieved during the astral experience was played out in a similar fashion a couple days later. This morning a girl said, something I never heard her say before, "do i give a f**k"
It was exactly like in my dream. Some kind of inner alarm went off and although I could not piece everything together- I have this idea that my family and I are all going through a transformative spiritual experience. Like a turning of the page, and this dream has been laid out before me indicating a type of guidance.

When she said that I immediately thought of the dream. I don't have answers- but I do acknowledge the idea of guidance impacting my life and find the parallels between wake and dream out of my (conscious) control.

Smoldering beings, sex theme, water beings, telepathy...

Another adventure and hard to recall details...

I remember a man disguised as a child, winning over the affections of this girl who has telepathic abilities. He was recruiting people to help fight in some war. She had this feeling of hesitation. Behind the scenes were these flame beings invisible to everyone else. I remember seeing them run along and through a crowd of people and no one noticed them. Their flames didn't spread but just came off these black bodies. I saw one standing behind a window looking right at me. Just standing there- they are larger than the people but they aren't giants. Their face is like smoldering stone. Their entire body has that glow. Type smoldering in your search bar and look at the images. It's exactly the color and layers of these beings.

There are some choppy in between scenes here which are connected to the overall adventure.
I remember this guy who owns a vehicle using it to help escort a small crew, the girl with telepathic abilities to be included in the group. We were all sitting down talking- he owns the vehicle but needs the AC replaced.

Another segmented memory/dream recall- I am in my friend Scotts car and he is taking me to a place to see these elephants. He ask if I've ever been, I didn't think I have- until we get there. Then I am filled with childlike wonder and excitement when I see these giant and beautiful elephants. I say I've been to this place before.

 I realize I am both the man disguised as the child and the girl with telepathic abilities. Or perhaps, this entire adventure is describing my current romantic pursuits.

There are some more details coming... We are now recruited and given an option to help fight or not. The girl is reluctant at first and is threatened imprisonment. It's a long time and being imprisoned in this environment means turning into this grotesque bloated blue mushy being. Of course she doesn't want it. And she tries telling the man who was once posing as a child that this is an unrealistic expectation- and who could survive in this place. That's when a woman who had been somehow imprisoned in the same situation comes out from behind the wall. She is no longer her beautiful self but entrapped behind this self containing water suit- speaking without moving her lips. She is like a fish or something aquatic but human. She is leading this rebellion. The helmet to her suit is kind of like a clear and long space helmet. She is reasoning with the girl encouraging her to get involved.

This is where worlds change. I am also reminded of my friend Shelby. I can't connect how at this time. And that earlier scene of the flame beings running through the crowd- is somehow happening here again. The shift in worlds. It's taking place in a public garage with people running up a ramp escaping the facility alongside the leader of the rebellion faction.

Now the recall is focused on the romantic relationship between the guy and the girl. We are chasing one another. We are both human and aquatic ourselves. It's like a water world without the water- the movement is fluid. Sometimes human, sometimes shapeshifting into these smaller blanket like beings that pull themselves through the air like an octopus gliding in water. We love each other. Perhaps we are underwater... Because there is this scene. The theme is attempting to court. The first two times there was hesitation. One on the girls and one on the guys. In the second scene- this scene, we are being encouraged by these faerie water like creatures to have sex. These little creatures are caressing our bodies and giggling with lust as they help pull my pants off. They are quite literally trying to guide my member into the woman. There is a very tribal element. I am convinced I am having sex in public but don't care anymore.

In fact... Now I remembering- she was putting her body on me, I remember her stomach- a red line going up the side of her belly button. She has a flat stomach- pressing against mine and moving up. I still had my shorts on but thrusting my pelvis into her. We were outside around people, and I didn't care. That's when the people of some tribe realized we were being intimate- they were engaging in some ritual- that's when these little faerie water creatures were encouraging us to complete the deed. Some hesitation again happens and the courtship/impregnation doesn't happen.

I see the scene with her off in the distance in heat, and another man tries to claim her. She is mine. I think he is one of those flame beings disguised as a human. I am overcome with anger. I do not allow this man to get near her. I remember walking up to him and grabbing each of his wrist. I start pushing him back, despite his best efforts I feel like my strength has really grown... I am continually pushing him back, there is still anger building up inside me... I threaten him with my eyes, very loudly they are screaming and beaming into his. That's when he starts pushing some flame out from his human disguise. I see he tries to maim me. I remember him taking his finger which had been like a hot prod and trying to sizzle my skin with it. I took his finger and shoved it in his mouth and burned his own tongue-
My mind is still on the girl, but I don't see her... I am a little saddened that I am overcome with such possessive rage. I take the guys smoldering finger and rub it against his human face over and over until I think the finger breaks off.



I wake up... 


------
I wonder if this has anything to do with me asking my self when is appropriate to engage with a girl I'm interested in, who is interested in me, and is in no rush to be intimate. I desire her and am having to temper my own lust as we try to get to know one another. I think she may have an emotional wound around sex or maybe she has a more realistic view on sex and love than me. I don't know.

sister calls me telepathically, dream of room 608

my sisters job interview is today. i think she is nervous. i woke up to her voice, "hey eric!" which literally caused my heart to sink and instantaneously i felt a very uncomfortable sensation in my body.

i fall back asleep and had a dream with her in it. she invited me to some beach house(condo style), it's a place i've dreamt of before where i met amma the hugging saint. only this time it was kind of like a party environment. our room was stationed near the front in a social area where you could hear people partying outside. april(my sister) told me she was leaving for dinner with some friends. it was like 11pm or so and they were just going out. i asked her if i had a room card- she reached into her purse and gave it to me, "room 608" she says. then she leaves and i see her drive off with two girlfriends- one is resting on top of the car. i think it's odd she wants to eat so late, and some boys try giving april attention which annoys the friend who wants to eat. i make a comment to my self about her weight and think it has something to do with eating italian food at midnight.

i also am remembering a random dream sequence with doug- i am walking in an area of something like a academy sports and outdoors looking at bows. in this particular scene someone walks by me and i get this feeling my friend william is doing okay- doug is the one taking care of him. doug and i rendezvous in a crowd of people and we are the only two sandal wearing folks in the entire crowd. my foot steps on his or vice versa and we pause here to exchange wisdom in whispers. doug and min are hanging out- i believe in real life, as this dream sequence is interjected into my experience.

now we are back in my room 608 and april just left with her friends. it's loud outside and i can't sleep. i take my key card and get into an old convertible of some sort. i am driving down a busy street the feeling is like mardi gras or a party. there is a surreal moment of slow motion where a giant headless god drives down the street- in place of its head is a camera and its filming the people driving their cars towards it. i feel high or something but i remember getting on the hood of my car, my body sprawled out very lazily upside down and looking into the camera like i was stoned. i was somewhat posing in a deliberate manner thinking i'd surprise whoever was on the other side like they might see me on TV. 

suddenly i wake up in a slum(still dreaming). i am eating a piece of chicken. there's a giant dog eating trash next to me. i tear off a piece of chicken and try throwing it at him. he ignores me but a second dog comes out from behind a dumpster. the scene is wet ground and loose gravel- brown colors. the second dog is a giant black poodle and half of its body is covered in mud and poop. the hair is clumped and dried from the feces. there's some poop in one of its eyes. i feed him some chicken. as i look into his eyes i throw the rest of the food off to the side. the food lands and causes a wave of flies to lift off the ground and start heading towards me. i wake up.

continued meat dreams and a dream with gurunath

there was mentions of dragon meat. i was also cooking a turkey and buttering the skin inside and out.
and someone made what looked like cooked bat, it was disgusting.

later i dream of a picture of gurunath teaching people about reflection. he has three versions of himself. one is standing in front of a class- the other is standing in the back and the third is on the mirror on the left. people are looking at their reflection. it's a 3 dimensional black and white picture that i can observe as formless awareness within the frame allowing me to feel the depths of the environment.

Nannette, boomerang

Nannette wants to use to me to communicate with her dead husband.
Later I have a boomerang and throw it at these "desires" the boomerang returns to my hand and all desires will be satisfied.

I wake up to pee, it's too early to record my dreams so i decide to go back to sleep. I try really hard to remember the above details- so much that the following dream recall escapes me.
I just remember being involved in a war, it wasn't on earth. First I was hiding then I had to come out and fight. By the time I was ready to fight there were people on my side to help. We confronted a general sitting in a throne who thought it was his. My people and I rushed in before he could declare himself the rightful authority. We were all supposedly on the same side... except this man did not want to surrender his power. As we fight I remember in the most surreal fashion big tall buildings being erected in the city square. It concerned some of my people- they asked why I was doing this. I told them something like... the new infrastructure is creating fear and showing people we mean business. I then turned to the people, not soldiers, and started getting them to chant "Fight." It terrified the general and his men to see the people in the city ready to fight-
I also remember a scene painting red, blue and green on a wall. I painted it tall and the paint transformed into some kind of door which is what brought me into the whole fighting scene.

Just wanted to make some quick notes in relation to my dreams...

I have a dream posted where I woke up to my Sister saying, "hey eric!" and having a most uncomfortable sensation.

She came for dinner the next day and I asked her if she was nervous over something last night. She told me she was up at 2AM nervous about her job interview. It went well by the way. But this confirms the feeling and perhaps a type of telepathic communication.

I also recorded, just recently, a dream about my families friend Nannette. After coming home from work today I heard my Mom talking to someone on the phone. It turned out to be her friend Nannette. They only talk once in a while- it's not a regular occurrence, and it turns out they're going to go to dinner with Nannette and her new husband. Her last husband died early in part due to his addiction issues.

I told Mom about it tonight... I told her that in the dream she was somehow wanting to communicate with Rick(deceased husband). I also told Mom I had a boomerang in the dream and she said she distinctly remembers I used to have a boomerang as a child and she thinks it was somehow associated with Rick. We used to have dinner parties and Rick would entertain us kids with fireworks and all kinds of toys.

I wonder though... Because she probably won't talk about Rick around her new husband- could Rick actually want to talk to Her??? I didn't tell Mom that Nannette was using me to make the connection... But was Rick actually trying to use me to help deliver his presence?

Eh, just thinking aloud and confirming some pretty cool alignments.

Reviewing the recent culmination of my dreams I am given a message. I believe I am being asked to slow down with the assurance that my desires *WILL* be satisfied... *IN TIME.* Maintain the course, the *disciplines* to see the desired results... What are those results? Financial independence, harmonious relationships, increased income with current career choice and one day to create a family. To be a better Son, friend, Lover, Father...

I can do it, if I slow down and maintain the course. Last nights dream tells me I need to potentially readjust my attitude- be adaptable to circumstance and re-strategize or refocus on the deeper goals.

RV, Car and friends bailing on me
I had a dream that people were partying in one of my homes. I wasn't much for it- and wanted them to leave, people stayed well past 2AM as if to spite me. I am not sure if I was there or watching from a distance. I remember having to deal with a car situation. I had an RV parked somewhere in San Antonio and had my car with me. The parking had cost somewhere between $92 or $96. I tried getting friends to take the RV back to Houston with me or drive my car(manual transmission) while I drive the RV. Many friends who attended this party were not willing to help me in my time of need. Even childhood friends tried to pass me off. One such childhood friend I found in a "hidden wall" and his Mom lead me to him. So I am actively seeking Help in the dream and realizing I am needing to adjust my plans.

time travel, going forward and understanding dream archetypes

I was with a friend- leaving a scene. We took a speed rail. I thought we were going to take a speed rail to an airplane. I thought I'd have the opportunity to take a nap. We never got to the airplane and the speed rail took us to our final destination. I was out of sorts by how fast we just traveled. I didn't really understand. This looked like my destination, but some things were different. I am trying to order food- some food items have a familiarity and some things are new.

I discover the reason for everything feeling so off is because the year is sometime 2036 or 2039. I wake up. I try to remember the details and am too tired to record them. Before going back to sleep it dawns on me that through out these attempts to journal I've visited the same place more often than I realize. They may not always be the same place- but they are the same archetype even if different variants. For example, a hotel. A beach. An airport.

Lately I am beginning to notice I am exploring a hotel often. It isn't always the exact same, but it's always a hotel. Now the job is to see if I can understand/associate a personal meaning in relation to what happens in these places.

As I go back to sleep I am again placed in a dream that propels me into the same future year. That's odd... I wake up.

Brian, care sales, memory loss, uncle

I dreamt of my friend Brian who've Ive parted ways with. We were selling cars, he was the sales manager and wanted me to help demonstrate a Volkswagen to a woman who needed convincing. The only car we had to demo was the beetle on the showroom floor. As I open the doors to the dealership to move cars around I spot a beautiful dark green mint conditoned 300zx. I want it, but Naser our sales manager tells me not to touch it, that someone else is buying it.

There is a scene where I'm at the dealership the next day and asking Brian what happened with the girl we were supposed to demo the car with. I have serious concerns about my mental health as I can't seem to recall anything past that moment. This confuses and concerns brian as well. Its as of my memory had been completely wiped. I legitimately can't remember the rest of the day after that. Only that she never got to demo the vehicle. My mind only remembers the dark green 300zx.

Later I dream that my Uncle pulls me aside and thanks me. He feels that I gave him a space when the rest of the family was ready to give up on him. I feel like I didn't do much but he was extremely grateful and taking a moment. I was a little stand offish at first because I don't feel like I did much of anything. But I gave him the floor and listened to what he had to say.

A peculiar agreement, a child and an escaped fugitive

I had a strange dream, another adventure of sorts...

A woman somehow convinced me to turn myself into police. She would have my child, and she would then help me break out of jail. When I told Mom the plan, she was pissed off at me and left the table(the logical side of me, not dreaming, agrees with moms reaction). For whatever dumb reason I agree with this woman to turn myself in jail- for which I am given 50 years prison time. I tell my Dad and he says, what did you expect? I look at the woman who agreed to have my child and wondered how I could fall for such an agreement?
I remember a scene with my jail cell having 50 unique lottery tickets attached to the wall. One for each year.

So somewhere in the dream I am actually holding a child that calls me, "Dada." It was one of the most heart warming sensations. But I'm not sure it was with this woman. The woman who tricked me into loving her and turning my self in had almost all but forgotten me. I called her 20 years into my 50 year prison sentence. I told her she better be ready to help me escape, now is the time. I somehow learn that she attempted to stab the baby in her womb- and yet her and another person agree to help me escape.

I can't recall how but I am now an escaped fugitive in an RV with Mom and Dad going across state lines. We take refuge somewhere in Florida. I have a pet cat as a companion. The RV is parked atop a hill. It has a button that lowers the side walls and exposes you to the outside environment. Before pushing that button there is a wild police chase happening alongside us. I implore my Mom to wait before going to the outside world- when I am given the time to explain to them that the cops and military men who happen to be on the scene aren't there for us- I feel more comfortable letting her explore.

My Cat is going stir crazy and wants to be let out too. No longer an affectionate cat she is pacing to and fro at high speeds in the totality of the RV. When Dad finally lowers the walls to the RV we go outside to explore. I remember looking at flowers behind a camera lens. The camera has different filters- one being high contrast which changes the colors of the flowers. Another being swirling stars which adds luminary star like effects to the flowers. The cat almost escaped and Mom had to rescue the cat in the rain.

I can't remember much more than this. I specifically remember having a child though. I just want to make sure I am in that childs life and that I don't agree to something so stupid like the initial part of the dream suggest.

Human animal hybrid, playing in the ocean, female reciprocation, personal message

i am playing with a girl, we are both human and underwater creature hybrids. we are having so much fun swimming and propelling ourselves in the water, and our bodies rub against each other and it becomes a game. i get the feeling this is the persian girl i tried dating.

later my friend rob ask me to get this girls number(rob and i are sitting down somewhere). i go for it, and she tries to humiliate me in front of people. though i get red i shrug it off and tell her its okay. she is kind of annoyed with me wondering why im handling her rejection so well. she says something like, you must have dated lots of women to be so confident. i tell her that i am actually quite naive and was shy growing up. that i haven't dated many women but that i found her attractive and figured it was better to say something in person than not. this surprises her... i walk away and tell rob what happened- so no number for us. then, she comes up to the table and apologizes. she pulls out an old nokia phone and suddenly i am seeing photos of her life go by. she became extremely interested and gives me her number in front of rob. i see rob asking to himself, "what about me?" and before she walks away she notices and tells rob- you should have asked me yourself. this was your chance! still, she obliges and gives rob her number.

i keep thinking this is somehow related to the girl i tried dating recently. i think my confidence in liking her and displaying my affections scared her off- but in my dream we had so much fun together. i keep thinking it was about allowing ourselves to enjoy the experience rather than have so many reservations. i know this might just be a message for me. to be continued ...

category 2 hurricane, mud, christmas, continued life underwater

Last thing before I wake up is thinking of a category 2 hurricane.

I also remember hiding from someone in the mud. They would walk over me not realizing I was just beneath them.

I also remember dreaming about this girl who, instead of graduating with everybody else, was performing in an underwater show.

She was in a tank, half naked- and there were these really large and zombified dolphins on the other side of this metal barrier.

People are watching from the outside. She positions herself in the corner and gives the nod. They release the fleshy and angry looking dolphins. They are kind of lifeless as they creep towards her. She twirls and then swims to another chamber that would remove her from their presence. It's a two step barrier. Each door doesn't close all the way and one of the dolphins recognizes an opportunity to attack. Someone helps the girl by pulling her towards them and shutting the door just before the dolphin uses his nose to break through the opening gate.

I am zoomed in on this breathing apparatus that has allowed her to be underwater for so long. She is a guest in this underwater living area.

I am also remembering changing from male to female, and female to male based on the required energy dynamic. It is around christmas time and there is a feeling of needing to accomplish something. I am with a small group-

I just remembered dreaming about explaining to someone the mark of the beast. Basically, the amazon shopping experience where you can grab items and walk out the store "without paying". It's the mark that allows them to buy and interact in society. 

8.5%APR, psychometry, buttered insect, tainted food, rigged court system, welfare like program

i had a dream that i was transferring money out of a chase bank account into my credit unions because they had a promotion for a savings account of 8.5%APR. i did this but was told i'd have to undergo a review by some organization, it was a three day process. i didn't realize. i am just coming out of debt in this dream and have less than $1,000 put into the new account. i am talking to chase(my friend, not the bank) about what happened. i am explaining that i don't qualify for the 8.5% he looks at it and agrees i should most likely pull out.

there is also a scene where this little guy has a really long knife and tries fighting me with it. someone throws me a weapon and we try to engage each other. i take a few ground swings with the weapon i was given and this scares the little guy off. he transforms into a giant ant and runs away. what's left is this exaggeratively large stick bug which i kill by hacking into pieces with the weapon. the weapon is like a whip and i cut the bug into sections and suddenly there are people there ready to feast on the cross sectioned insect. somehow after slicing him up slabs of hot butter are placed over the now dead stick bug. i have no interest in eating an insect but the people there are looking at this thing like a delicacy.

now i am back looking at this agreement with chase(the friend, not the bank) while there is a movie showing in the background. the people watching the movie all belong to the same group-entity.
as i study the details of the 8.5%APR i learn it belongs to an affiliate related to the biden administration. in order to qualify you allow someone to your home and they are basically erecting their own business dynamic in your home. it kind of feels like welfare or something that is given and takes advantage of lower income folks. in this instance you have to allow experimental marijuana to go in and out of your house. i end up on in front of a woman at a help desk belonging to the credit union explaining that i'd like to take my money back and the only reason i dumped it there was because of the 8.5% advertisement.

she ends up having to make a phone call to someone i can't see. she explains to me while off the phone that she was once a part of this program and didn't much like it. i notice her crazy hair colour and gauges in her ears and think of her excessive liberal personality as a bit discomforting. she tells me if i transfer it all out that i'd suffer an overdraft penalty. i look at my chase bank and realize i suffered one with them and acknowledge her being right in this situation. she told me there's a $25 minimum to keep in the account, and suggest i keep another $25 alongside it because they can't transfer the money all at once and have to do these small transactions that are also somehow taxed. the extra $25, in her mind, would cover the tax and differences.
she tells me she believes it would and that she is going to need time with the guy on the phone- that it's a bit complicated but that she doesn't mind doing the work for me.

i take an interest in this woman not because of her loud liberal personality(which sends caution into my entire being) but because her eyes are gorgeous. dark brown and very big. after she is finished helping me i ask her if she wants to give me her phone number. she is also scared at first and makes me promise her im not a different person from the person she decided to help. i was confused by this and told her i cant promise that- but that i could promise my intentions are good and that i find her attractive. she smiled and thought this acceptable and had me walk her to her car. we end up navigating through a spiraling two or three leveled garage which is far compared to where i parked. i am leaned against her side and intuiting some strange events by touching her arm. i tell her i'm lost in this garage and can't remember where i parked.

she fades out of the scene and next thing i know i am in a court. it's clearly a one sided court system. it opens up with arguments being made against me. there's a ton of people in this court and they belong to this group of black, red and white colors. the opening statement by this judge is that i am the leader of this group- and they play something on the television reminscent of what loos like sieg heils. then the group in the audience stands up and does something similar. i interrupt the judge and ask if im allowed to ask a question. surprisingly the judge allows it. i tell him i don't know what this group is, never heard of them before but that it seems like a cult. i ask in a most naive manner. "is this a cult i belong to?" implying i know nothing about the group or their behavior. what's strange as well is that after opening remarks are made this same group is serving everyone food before the trial starts. i am once again hesitant by the food being administered to the public. i feel like this is the same group associated with the biden administration and that there is something in the food we should not eat. the food is being passed down from my left and to the right- the people are so hungry and they are eating this meat and bread in a ravenous fashion. i give the person the bread- i am wondering about what i will eat but look at this food and realize something is not right at all. i feel like i'm being set up and it is obvious to people outside this show that there are some staged things happening against me.

Really? One of your dreams was; Feasting on a stick bug? That’s quite humorous! I am happy to say I have more time to read this section now, since we have a site of mostly psychic and spiritual experiences subjects for the time being.

blink like travelling, bombs, korea

the first series of dreams i am potentially time travelling or blinking around vast distances and disarming bombs in various countries. i run into myself at one point while in russia? and at the end of it i ask my friend min who is here helping his thoughts on korea. he is confident we are fine but there is a noticeable pressure and he has bombs attached to himself.

i later dream that i see javier teaching two girls about a book i'm supposed to read- but am reading another book instead. there is something like giant mech piloting with a 360 degree view and a possible repeated theme as i am training in this thing to neutralize incoming missile attacks.

Javier, Sean, video game suggesting to be bad guy

I remember dreaming about Javier again. I'm being invited to partake in a hallucinogenic experience. MDA or something? ADA? It looks like this fermented thing suspended in water and he's excited to try "the pink one." I say no thank you.

There is also a memory of splitting an expensive dinner bill with my friend Sean B. Sean is upset that we didn't get the $10 off and thinks I'm stupid for not noticing or caring. The waitress reminds me that both Sean and I are smart in different ways. So the bill ended up being a little over $200 for each person. Looking back. I'm not sure the tip was high enough.

I also remember being the new guy in a work environment and wearing my pineapple hat on day one. I was helping people laugh, I was happy everyone enjoyed the pineapple hat although they seemed to take my shenanigan as a type of character flaw. They were laughing at me not realizing I was intentionally giving them the opportunity to lighten up. They assumed I was wearing this hat as some kind of shameful punishment.

Lastly, before waking up... We're at a table discussing a video game. This man is inviting us to be the bad guys in the game. He is quite convincing. I get a sneaking suspicion that what he's asking us to do is more than taking a chaos role in a video game. There are weird parallels to real life. He shows everyone that "they're burning our crops." He ask at the table- why do you think they're burning your crops? I blurt out like a kid in class, "to control resources!" No one says anything. He looks at me like I'm right but can only make reference to this "video game." To the simulation. He says, "in the game, they burn the field to decrease your chances with the built in RNG." He goes on to say by systematically breaking the "rules" and controlling the environment they are hoping that you play the game while still maintaining the "noble" character and following the rules. An example he gave us had to do with stealing a vehicle. If we played this "game" by the "rules" our chances of having extremely tough statistics are significantly less. The more misdeeds we commit the higher our chances of being "tough zombies." (I almost became lucid when he said zombies having had recent dreams around zombies). I saw a giant spider when he said this.

I randomly see one of my customers with a woman in the bleachers, it's nighttime and they're watching a baseball game. They are somehow representing the last few noble characters in the video game. The man from earlier pulls me aside and ask what my hesitation is. I tell him I'm worried it's not just a game. I am proven right by his behavior and his response. Ultimately he ends up proving himself as a flesh eating angry person. He tried serving me a human leg he severed earlier in the form of ham-like deli slices. I refused and he was visibly angry at me, eating human flesh. After realizing this confirmation of sorts I woke up.

I’m wondering Eric. Do you feel you’re ever deprived of proper rest with all these dramas going on nightly? Who would need movies with so much questionable 🤨 nightly entertainment ??

I love dreams Steve. I record them daily. I believe the practice a precursor to lucid dreaming and out of body experiences. Not only that, I am in a community where we log our dreams and have had surprising synchronicities. That being said. Sometimes I wake up more rested than others. Not sure my dream recall has anything to do with it.

When I took psychology years ago I was taught that the average person dreams anywhere from 6-8 dreams a night. Most people have trouble remembering just one.

True, some dreams are a recollection of past events and unspoken feelings. Also true some dreams are more than that. Dreams are a powerful window into the subconscious, which I believe is not limited to what takes place underneath ones skull. 

In this community, we have observed accurate premonitions.

Some dreams I am observing as formless awareness, other dreams I am roaming from one set of eyes to another. Some dreams I have multiple selves and in other dreams I am someone else. Some dreams I am travelling time.

All of this to say dreaming is both unique and universal. Symbology is one thing and then there are also direct meaningful experiences. You don't know what's what until you start recording and navigating this realm.

Lastly...

Row, row, row your boat...
Gently down the stream....
Merrily, merrily
Merrily, merrily...

Life is but....

 :)

 I feel that if other people have  a meaningful spiritual life on their spiritual path, that it is not for me to comment but rather to appreciate. I do have much more time to read about the personal life of others since there aren’t so many political posts.

I have put Eric’s and my last dream together under a post for members since they have some similarities at;

To those interested,

I want you to check out "Eric’s dream and Steve’s and psychics" on Spiritual Portal.  To view it, please click this link:

http://spiritualportal.net/index.php?topic=8144.0

A comment has also been added regarding this topic:
Psychic thoughts and dreams

Thanks,
Steve Hydonus

Unwelcomed Eroticism, Casey, and Forceful Removal of Strangers

I had a dream I was on a video call with Casey. Someone was offering her a server. There was a man from Germany hosting the conference call who kept his camera on his exposed erection. I felt really strange but Casey seemed mostly unphased and slightly interested. I woke up wondering, what the heck. When I fell back asleep it's like I was shown a constellation that starts with a C and realized something about where Casey's from and a strong affinity towards working with subconscious. I suppose the "exposure of intimate parts" has some direct correlation.

Later I dream I am married to this girl whom I barely recognize. It's almost like a forced partnership. There is a strange scene where I am pushing the sides of my thumbnail to empty out this insane amount of debris which had been kept under the nail. It gets all over the blanket. The "wife" has some kind of partial moustache growth on her face. I am not feeling attracted to her but I am not trying to be mean to her either... We are having a party and the guest have stayed way past the desired time. I ask her what time we started getting guest out- 12:30 and asked what time is it now- 1:20AM. This caused me to become extremely forceful with people- literally carrying them by their necks out of this house. Apparently I have a playful dog that belongs to us and keeps jumping on me as I try to get people to leave. My Dads friends are the last ones in the house, which leaves me somewhat contented. Rick Powers ask me if I've offered the drunk people a place to stay- and I regrettably tell him no I just kicked them out. There is one man who took my forceful removal of others as a cue to try fighting me. He is super strong but I am using my entire bodyweight to keep him pinned on the ground. He continues to try and break free from being weighed down and I tell him, I don't want to fight him. I comment on his strength, despite being a short guy he would be the first one to knock me out. I remind him, the taller they are the harder they fall- referencing myself. Finally he agrees to leave without further confrontation.

Hospital, Airport, Brian and his Wife

I am roaming the halls of what feels like a cross between a hospital, hotel, and airport all in one. I am helping a version of Brian who is worried about a woman. She needs help... I am roaming the halls for her. At the end of the dream, a different version of Brian appears. One who is callous, modern, and has no regard for the woman he asked me to help. I meet this version of Brian at the airport, it's like he's checking in on what's going on. He doesn't realize there's another version of him already here- and doesn't know who this woman is. When it is explained to him, he is texting his boss/friend saying in Farsi that this woman is gross and he doesn't have any time for this dumb shit. I am disgusted by his behavior. I spin around and hit his ear with the backside of my hand. This causes him to smile as we both draw a martial arts pose before I wake up.

I think that we are both attempting to find meaning in our lives, whether in dreams in the symbology of life or in the various people animals and events that enter in the drama around us. Some of us are unaware that we have chosen to work out karma in this life before we came into it. So we also see the results of karma  in all the events of our life. We may have much more compassion after encounters with difficult people who show us how we have treated others in the remote past. When someone kind enters our life and dreams we are grateful and blessed.

Thanks for your interest Steve.

A merging of love interest?

Before bed I asked God to shed some light on a new love interest. I will learn about her tonight!

Well... I barely remember my dreams, quite chaotic! I DO* remember, a bunch of cars parked horrendously in my driveway. A man with a large company truck hauling a motorcycle trailer ends up hitting one of my vehicles. I come out to tell him something like... I understand it was difficult for you to pull into my driveway- but you hit my jeep.

Really strange but the man kind of reminds me of that young politician in PA- Fetterman. I don't know anything about him- just that he has this bald-headed hard knocks look about him and acts a bit ignorant/callous. Also, I don't even own a jeep. I specifically remember the dent on the side of my door- and the dent on the front side of his truck.

My Dad and his buddies, and the many people that hitched a ride in this mans company truck all decide to poke around and look at my jeep. They are impressed by the brown interior. For some reason, this pleases everyone and it also reminds them of President Trump. They realize it's nicer than they thought- except the older gentlemen ask me if it's a 6-cylinder or 4, claiming the 6-cylinder is far superior.

Instead of making it about my jeep I tell him I am more interested in the new model, the wagoneer. 

Later, and this is where it gets kind of blurry. Jessica, my very first long-term girlfriend is riding with me on the back of my motorcycle. We are on our way to pick up a friend- Nancy. Nancy is a woman I had an intense unreciprocated crush on- believing I had known her in a past life. We get lost in this run-down neighborhood where the streets are more like grass and gravel pavement. There's a busy school which is our landmark- and there are parking lots- the temperatures in the dream start to turn cold, there's ice all over and there are rising water levels on the streets. I call Nancy and tell her we can't find her.

Somehow she agrees to meet us at this landmark, the school. There she tells Jessica I'm the guy that ended up liking her, while she ended up dating my friend. She laughs at it like it's no big deal but Jessica, in the back, is crying. I don't understand why Jessica is crying. And Nancy realizes she should probably keep her mouth shut. Jessica is tired that it took us so long, that we don't have a clear road to travel on and that the conditions are not in our favor. Nancy is telling us that she outgrew the neighborhood and she is ready to take on bigger and bolder things.

-----
That's all I really remember.

What's interesting to me is this girl I am attracted to has a cross between Jessica and Nancy. What I mean is, her physical appearance looks like a blend of the two. Now... This girl is undoubtedly unrelated and her own person, entirely. So I am not making the mistake of assuming and creating definitions based on past experiences... It seems whenever I open up my heart in complete sincerity or a type of submission towards love-themed desires... There's a lesson. Perhaps this is Spirit acknowledging my interest and speaking to me through my last love interest.

Right now I'm not able to make much sense of it all. But am very excited to meet such a lovely new person. = )
Maybe this is my way of saying that I've carried around a desire for real love- and am also feeling more confident with exploring new things. There are some outdated structures that are no longer efficient.
Crazy though, that literally, someone can share such strong physiology with our past. And yet have entirely new meanings.

Spending time with Carolina, Killer Bee & Spinning Rope Dart

I just remember spending time with Carolina, she was wearing black and red lingerie and teasing me sexually. She had something coated on her finger and swirled it around my mouth. I remember sucking on her finger and seeing her bottom in tight leggings black and red spandex and my minds eye blurrily focused on this. Very hazy vision and sensual sensations. After, I remember spinning a rope dart like a weapon that controlled the movements of this killer bee like a drone. Someone asked me to show off how well I could control it by hitting a piece of paper with the rope dart at exactly the right points in front of him. I smiled manically at the challenge and was precise enough but as I was hitting the points of the paper a large black killer bee appeared off in my peripherals. It seemed to move with the spinning fan- If I lost control the bee would go off in a wild direction. These movements are somehow connected.

shapeshifting animal, captured and freed

I was a bear turning itself in to be killed. I didn't completely realize I was doing this until the three women there made it clear they intended on killing and eating me. My Sister and her friends came to my rescue, by the time she realized what was happening- I had enough time and was transformed into a wolf escaping its environment. My Sister saw me as a wolf before disappearing and understood the situation had been resolved.

I thought I heard someone crying wolf late into the weeee hours of dawn and disturbing camp. Next time I’ll bring barbecue sauce when my sisters and I go hunting in Da’Coons Forest.

AoOOoOoOOOOOOOO!!! Be careful. I may have found my pack.

Soon the hunter becomes the hunted.  :)

grandpas treasures, brian and weed, sleep and spiderman

I remember talking to my Grandpa. In the dream he is able to speak(he had a stroke IRL and is unable to talk). He is talking to me and helping me unlock some of his personal treasures. He shows me different compartments and tells me, why don't you unlock this one? Pointing to a more complicated lock system. I tell him I don't know how to unlock that and he does it for me, revealing all of his medals earned while a marine. They are his accomplishments and he explains to me each one.



Later I visit Brian at his Moms house. He wants me to smoke weed and I don't smoke. I act excited at the prospect of, "black cherry kush" or dark cherry dank. Something like that. He only gives me a pinch because I tell him I can't handle it. After inhaling a pinch all I remember is falling asleep and waking up an hour later. I ask him what happened, we got very little sleep. We fell asleep around 6AM and woke up at 7ish. He woke up to guest coming to his house, I told him I did not get enough sleep and was going home.



On the way home I remember being confronted by people who meant to harm me. We were in an underground tunnel system. Here I am learning how to escape like the experience is a simulation. I have spidermans capabilities, shooting a web and avoiding my would-be attackers. It's a learning process and someone is guiding this simulation like it's a video game with different difficulties. I tell him to up the difficulty even though I clearly can not control my new abilities- really having a hard time steering my avatar. He ups the difficulty and I run into a more capable version of myself who has really taken to his new abilities. I crash into my self and before falling asleep in the dream just remember the people chasing me.



I lose awareness here and am sleeping before my alarm goes off. 

Yea how do I detect wolves 🐺 in sheep’s clothing?

Waterworld, Airplane, Tower, Dominion, Whataburger. 7 and 13

I'm exploring something like a spiral tower which seems to be a type of school with permanent residence. It's not the easiest thing to navigate. There's really only one way to get to where you need and it isn't the most reliable. I am trying to get to the 13th floor. I take elevators which continually get me to the 7th floor.



During this I have the most vague recollection of a warring tribe on a waterworld. I am somehow mastering an ability, in a war for authority. This theme merges into the dream with the tower, which is where attention seems to anchor itself.



Back on the 7th floor I am asking students how to get to the 13th. Fortunately for me, a student told me there's a more direct route because the President happens to be here and is visiting. Yes, it's Joe Biden. In the dream he doesn't seem at all that competent or put-together. He is just there smiling, and it's like there's a greater force behind the scenes as I try to recall Bidens character. All I see with him is a constant smile as he believes himself charismatic. 



The way to the 13th floor is to hitch a ride on a type of ground vehicle outside the tower that extends up and out- like a bucket truck. I manage to hitch a ride and am told to be careful as it's a dangerous method.



Once at the 13th floor the scene shifts to the pilot of an airplane. There's something wrong with the plane and he is being told to ground it. He does not trust the environment and says if he lands the plane he will crash. The people over the radio are aggressive with him. He asks the President if he knows these people and the President says no. The pilot makes an executive decision and decides not to land, despite something being wrong with the plane.



Back at the tower I am told I need to continue to rise up and be intimate with the women at the top of the tower in order to have dominion over all floors. I am remembering another male with me. He is having sex with the women there but has his eyes on the queen as well. There are scenes of the waterworld in the back of my mind playing out at the same time.



On my quest to the top of the tower I take a detour with an old high school acquaintance. He's hungry. We go to whataburger. I am somehow the person taking the order on the other side. I remember taking a womans order... She wants 4 large chicken sandwiches, french fries and a drink.



Before waking up I am feeling the sensual nature of the woman at the top of the tower.

11/2/22

isolated memory/recall

I remember little tidbits. I didn't record right away.

I remember taking a motorcycle full throttle on a turn and having to drag my knee as I leaned into it. Still, I didn't handle it the best as I was pulled wide and out to the side.

Someone commented and I tried again, so I cut the turn more aggressively and handled it much better- and took the bike to a speed of 110mph.

I also remember being on someone's boat and we pulled into harbor. There were so many fancy, nice boats. It felt like I was in the Netherlands.

































--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
11/3/22

javier and jen, carpet installation, observing a car crash, dr. brown, creature trying to put a spell on me

i  watched javier and jen get a new carpet installed. i offered to help watch their dog. there were many workers, and they got it done all in the same day. i remember seeing them remove the old one and hammering nails in with the new one.

in another scene i am traveling with a group in a van. i see off in the distance a man and a friend going sideways down a hill in their ford mustang. i wonder if he's trying to drift. as we turn the corner(and we're at a higher elevation) the mustang flips and spins in the water. "whoa! whoa!" i shout and get everyone's attention. i explain the man crashed and feel like we should get out to help. fortunately the passenger is carrying the driver out from the water and despite the car being totaled and missing a wheel they are completely unharmed.

at the end of the recall i am waiting to speak to dr. brown the endocrinologist i visited. there's a line and i am called. i believe i am seeing him because i need clearance for, something. he says my energy levels are good and ask what i'm doing(since i've rejected his thyroid medication). i don't tell him everything i'm doing but i tell him i'm taking 1 brazil nut every day for the selenium content, i tell him i'm wearing compression socks and taking magnesium for the syncope diagnoses. (i don't tell him about the iodine every other day). he says he has no problem with the brazil nut and says i am doing better than before. that my, "levels" have returned within normal range.

after this i am visited by some tree spirit. the first one tried to put a spell on me and it didn't work. this memory is a little blurry. it's like i'm surrounded by whimsical creatures in a courtyard. there's a giant oak. the tree spirits brother threatens to put me to sleep with these powerful herbs different from the first one- i'm supposed to help him with... something.
i wake up. 

again isolated recall, fragmented memory- almost forgot then suddenly remembered bits and pieces... and a very interesting/odd conversation with my self during dream state:


I remember being chosen to represent a people as their champion. There was a project of enhancing abilities and cloaking and it literally involved wearing anothers skin. The skin comes from people that are already dead, previous champions who have gone through an embalming process. It's some kind of secret project. I have a weapon, I once again am remembering a rope dart as my weapon.

Also as a separate memory randomly within the recall is a proposed free savings account of $50,000. But after reading the fine print you have to maintain a certain amount in the account every year and a certain % is used against you and you end up with something like +$25. That or +$2,500. It's a big difference but it is still being mulled over in the dream because it is free money and it is an account I would never use.

Also very strange and hard to recall is that I am actually in conversation with some unknown entity- presumably my self. I am telling my self that I chose to learn alongside Ego and Spirit- that this means going through motions with Ego that may be more or less considered embarrassing. I am told I am doing fine, but the reason for some of my depression might have to do with this inability to recognize that I am again, going through the motions, with ego-based desires. It isn't necessarily about achieving the lesser desires, which were mistaken at one point as the only desires, but it is more about remembering this entire ordeal is a project for growth and learning alongside material/nature/ and even shallow desires.

It's as if there is something... Someone, on the other side. An aspect of my self, watching, and there may even be a spiritual family here on this journey with me- experiencing with me through my lone incarnation, not always aware that there is more than the mundane existence and more than the idea of an isolated personality. Not sure how much sense that makes, it's fuzzy- just a feeling that I have a "group" and though you can't see them... and though I hardly recognize them... they are here with me. It was like a pep talk with my self which I wasn't in full control of- I was more asking the questions and the answers seemed to me without my conscious awareness.

Kids Draw Negativity, Fish with Demonic Influence?

I forgot the first part of my dreams, just a vague recollection of alien technology- some kind of plasma cannon. I remember seeing unique light and energy floating across the terrain in what felt like one of my typical off-world adventures.

I woke up to use the restroom and fell back asleep.
There are these two kids with powers, they are like psychokinesis. They don't realize their attitude is going to get them killed, they produce negative effects- I remember a scene where they summoned a bunch of crows and scared these people. The idea here is they are using their powers in a negative and self sabotaging manner. One kid in particular is creating and heavily drenched in evil, omen after omen.

I remember rescuing this unique fish. It is the size of my pinky, slender black with flaps opening up on its bottom-side exposing a red line and a splash of white. It needs water to breathe and it's been put on land, its face is swelling and it is dying. I find a good tupperware style bowl. I remember filling it with water- I even remember choosing spring water over tap water. I put this fish in and on my drive with the fish in the bowl I am praying that it comes back to life. There is a uncertainty in this dream, whether the fish is demonic or not. It is quite a fearful sight. It comes back to life, the prayer brought a type of bond between us. I am going to petsmart to identify the kind of fish. When I get there, they are closed and really strange having a wedding inside the facility. An employee sees me with the fish though and is extremely disturbed by its appearance. The thing has grown in size- now encompassing the totality of the tupperware. It has a really scary looking mouth. The employee opens the fishes mouth and pulls out something that was stuck in its throat. This relieves the fish and allows him to move about in a more relaxed manner. Again there is this question whether the fish is of demonic influence- or making me numb to demonic forces. Or is it protecting me? Something, like the observing mind, is questioning this- as the black fish continues to grow in size- its mouth has ant like pincers, and it becomes more dominant and ominous in the minds eye.

acid, topless woman and bull

I don't recall as much this time around- I feel like there's a good chunk of data missing.
I remember something being so acidic that the side of my cheek corroded away. It ate my gums, it ate my flesh. You could see the side of my jaw/rows for teeth when I smiled. I was dealing with a partial deformity. Flesh and gum were eaten away.

After I woke up and used the restroom... I went back to sleep to dream about a young couple- there was a guy with a child and wife back home... But he was out neglecting his duties dating a young girl in a type of get-away scenery. I was somehow accompanying this young man while my Mother was helping the wife and child with the groceries back at their house. I told Mom, what are you doing? Get out of their house! Lol... It was like she invited herself at their doorstep to help. Everyone seemed appreciative though.

I found both the wife he left at home and the girl from the get away vacation extremely attractive. The scenery was something like shallow and gentle running water, beautiful weather, shade with vibrant green shrubbery, random marble slabs and steps implanted within nature at unique heights- it felt like we were at the edge of a cliff. The girl was spinning around on the marble, she was topless and wearing short shorts. The guy was smoking weed off in the distance. I was mesmerized by his girl. Suddenly a young bull came out from the shrubs and behind her. I had to warn her and get the man who was smoking attention. It's like I was indirectly in this scene- but using what ghostly presence I had to help lure the girl away from the bull. She hadn't turned around and noticed, but I was successful getting the young man to see- who called her over. By the time she hop and skipped over some marble she turned around and realized there was this majestic brown bull.

He looked kind of like this except he was a little larger, a little older, wiser and his presence was awe-inspiring
(https://st.depositphotos.com/1782532/4044/i/950/depositphotos_40444737-stock-photo-young-bull.jpg)

subterranean prison; the number 8

my sleep has not been the best lately. i still haven't adjusted to daylight savings. i wake up every so often through out the night, but when i am asleep it is deep and i can barely remember my dreams. i do remember, finally, being able to hold on to something.

i'm in some kind of life or death challenge- it's a subterranean prison. not everyone is human. specific obstacles are designed to kill you. no one is on your side. i remember however, befriending a creature that knew what he was doing. i followed his lead through out the course. i remember us trying to break free from this place. one obstacle required us to roll across this sticky tarp with all our force. the environment for this challenge is likened to a moonwalk pit. and once we roll past this extremely sticky ground we are in the opposite corners looking up because something is dropping from above designed to crush whoever is stuck. expected to die, we draw a lot of attention to ourselves for managing to get past this challenge. this creature is cloaked, he has many green glowing eyes coming from out of his hood. the recall is a bit blurry here. i am also remembering a beach underground?. even though the feeling is subterranean, there are large empty spaces and even flying ships. this creature and i have become so coordinated we use each others bodies to trick our pursuers. i remember him rescuing me with his ship, a zipline of some sort being shot out as i am jumping off a cliff and colliding with the creature as we are suspended midair, he then shoots some kind of rope back to the ship, and another rope back onto a shielded piece... it's kind of like a spider casting a web and we are suspending ourselves appropriately. the shield is like plasma energy.
the last piece i remember here is somehow making it out of this hellish prison, but not fully escaped from the land. we are in hiding. dragging ourselves through mud, off on the countryside. we don't want passerby's to see us. i remember being so low to the ground and trying to take the shape of the brush and mud as cars and children pass by to my left. i remember sliding and writhing across this mans backyard, which was like an oasis for wildlife. he was like the warden and land owner of this entire place and his home was like a resort compared to the subterranean prison i had just escaped. he was on his phone distracted and did not see me escaping into the wooded area his backyard leads up to. we are actually going up a narrow hill with trees and shrubs on either side. i see these wild birds and know my escape is finally upon me. i am now resting in the mud- and another black creature with many green glowing eyes comes up to me and presses its body against mine and we disappear into nothing.

when i fall back asleep i remember being in some kind of marathon. there is only one other person who races across this line with me. i don't mind him, he is slightly ahead of me. we both have our arms out, which is indicating our ability to fly. i only remember saying to myself how important the number 8 is. somehow this number means freedom and these challenges will be overcome.

killing a jaguar?

i was with a group of people... a jaguar invaded our space, he was hunting us/stalking us. at first we were scared and tried moving to a different room. but this one guy in our group was completely fed up and took an old dirty mattress and asked me or someone else to use it to capture the jaguar. the jaguar was entangled in parts of the mattress that were missing. the guy pushed the mattress down and effectively killed or smothered the jaguar. the threat was no longer there. i did not feel good about any of this.

the rest was very deep, and though there were multiple dreams- this is all i can recall.

martial arts, crossing muddy terrain, wolves, alien insects

i'm in a group with my friends sammy, scott and sammy's brother andrew.

we're practicing martial arts together and traveling across wide open lands. some areas are muddy and we're driving our motorcycles through the mud. other times we're on foot.

i remember a scene where two wolves come running up to us a little aggressively at first- but rather than run away i find myself barking at the dogs and chasing them. i howled like a wolf letting sammy and scott know(they were off in the distance) there were other wolves near and basically took control of the territory- shooing them away, establishing our "territory." it was like we were wolves ourselves and running as a separate pack.

i also dreamt of surreal creatures and insects. i was taking photos of them. i remember being zoomed in. the lady bug is a special symbol for me- this ladybug had alien eyes- everything was normal about this ladybug except its eyes, which were kind of detached bulbs from the rest of the creature. it was hovering in a stand still and radiating gold light.
afterwards i noticed a type of spider crawling up a car and i was taking photos of it eating a flower, it extended its mandibles and was also not an insect like i had seen before. it ate the flower in the fashion a venus fly trap would eat a fly. this was like a shapeshifting spider. these were alien insects and i was captivated.

falling asleep, salsa competition

i remember my friend david being around as i fell asleep in a recliner.



later i am put in a salsa competition and dancing with one of my high school crushes kathy b. it was nice holding her hands and feeling her body against mine, she liked me twirling her. when it came time to compete there was that adventure feel like id traveled and been through quite an experience.



i remember looking at an 80 year old man dance with two women. people were so surprised by his age, because he looked to be in his 40's.

cobra, prisoner, climbing, bunnies, travel(tennessee?)

lots of activity...

i remember the first dream, i saw a picture of myself. i was in much better shape than i am now. i was in a meditative pose, and there was a large cobra encompassing the entirety of my minds eye.

i was holding on to this detail so much that the subsequent dream is barley remembered- just that i am once again talking to carolina, her brother scott- and sammy. i am a guest somewhere... and i remember training outside, climbing up something using rings... the dream kind of descends and i have bits and pieces of information that i can recall.

there's naked people kept prisoner in cages. it's maddening to a degree, one man is being electrocuted as torture to break him and teach him compliance. they continually bring his heart, "back online" after severely shocking him. i see other naked men in cages and one guy is acting like an animal but they have a mirror in the cage and when he sees himself he recognizes his humanity. i felt him, his maddening isolation- his going crazy. somehow we are connected.

shortly after i remember being freed from this prison like setting and following a giant bunny. i am trying to capture his attention because he is so unphased by my being there. i end up following him down hill and a type of burrow to my left. i see another bunny covered in feces or mud. the burrow is home to many bunnies. there are plastic bags in the burrow. i begin tasking myself with cleaning it out. it slowly becomes more habitable. i am even rearranging the dirt trying to give it a fresh feel. while i'm doing this one of the rabbits wants to bite me. he doesn't, after realizing i've just cleaned his home. but somehow i start seeing a bunch of bunnies appear- all different shapes and sizes, and next thing i know i am being chased uphill by a ton of rabbits.

i then descend into another dream where i am being linked back to the prisoners. there's a bunch of children and i am watching the two older girls talk to one another wondering how they can break free from this absurd captivation. there are plenty of cats in this scene... that's all i really remember here.

lastly i am traveling alone. it is a really beautiful sensation- it feels like perhaps i've landed in tennesee. i end up in a womans yard and she is in her driveway, its a really long driveway with lots of shade. she's in her chair on her cellphone talking to someone. she notices me by her tree crossing her path. she just looks at me and we have a silent acknowledgement- asking her if i may cross. she carries on the conversation with her friend and mentions the city Houston(my hometown). i feel like i'm in the right place. i begin to notice all these beautiful insects climbing on her tree. i become so captivated by all the life on her tree. the health of her tree. the cool ambient light provided by the sun. the gentle shade. i almost recall the the aroma of fresh dirt... i can feel such a peaceful energy. i wake up to a very comforting and lovely sensation.

I haven't been maintaining my journal here but will provide an update. The last two weeks have been very eventful.

In one day alone I witnessed the following...

My coworkers friend lost her daughter. This girl was also like my coworkers daughter(as close as they all were). Her funeral is this Friday(same as Dads birthday). It was surreal to see my coworker break down, and to see her daughters come to her place of work to mourn together in the back. There was a high energy in their loss, they were together after all and that really stood out to me. May God Bless those who were lost and those still here suffering from this loss.

Two hours later I had to leave work to attend my friends wedding. I went from one high energy to another, this time I was witnessing the uniting of two families as a gain. When the priest was talking I was getting goosebumps over certain words(specifically, "permanence") which was an indication to me of a type of communication from Spirit. By the time the wedding was over I was invited to go to dinner but was feeling a little emotionally spent from all that I had just witnessed. I decided to go home and make a trip to the store to buy comfort food. Corn bread and lentil soup. On my drive there, I realized I witnessed a loving sense of togetherness in both the gain and the loss...

I was feeling this sense of connecting with my higher self and a strong desire to be a better family member, a better son and to embrace the role of a fatherly figure in my community. I called my Aunt to chat and during our phone call she said the words, "God" and "Life" when in that exact moment I noticed a car in front of me with a bumper sticker displaying two very large words, "God" and "Life." How God and our Larger Self are able to orchestrate reality in this manner is a most perplexing and satisfying mystery. I shared this with my Aunt then had to go because I arrived to the grocery store.

While at the store my Mother tried calling me. She was distraught. She had spent the day with a family friend and was calling me from her driveway(the friends driveway). Our friend was needing medical attention right away. Mom asked me to get Dad and come help her. She had tried calling Dad but he was passed out on the recliner with his phone on low volume. I woke him up to learn he was passed out from heavy drinking. By the grace of God we were able to navigate to the persons house, despite my Dad not remembering how to get there and despite my Mother not giving us the address. By the time we arrived the EMS was there. When it was all said and done, I left some banana bread I just happened to buy while at the store for Caroline, our family friend- hoping she'd see it the next day. My Dad estimates she has 6 months to a year left in this life. It's a crude assessment and I hope he is wrong, but it isn't too far from the truth. 

That happened in one day and I was really left ruminating on the wild chain of events. The amazing language from God as an unseen guiding system- had I gone to dinner after the wedding ceremony I might not have been able to help in the moment when Mom needed it. The sense of community and togetherness. The losses and the gains, the suffering and the joy. There's really still so much to take in from it all.   

As we were nearing the Thanksgiving holiday we had a different family friend over the course of a few nights- she is going through quite a bit too and may soon lose her Father. I tried to be accommodating to her and to my family. It's a good practice.

The Friday after Thanksgiving a child walked up to me and brandished a weapon. It was a pistol. He was trying to act tough in front of his friends. He looked half my body weight and scrawny as can be. There was a slight drizzle outside and it was two in the afternoon. He and his friend were asking me for two dollars and I said no. That's when the one kid moved in closer(he was so close I could have leaned forward and hit him with my head) and pulled a gun out from his persons and said, "are you sure about that?" I didn't know how to act- I just said I was sure. I could see the thoughts in his mind creating further instability- his behavior irrational, his anger multiplying. There was a moment where I really looked deeply into his eyes. That's when he decided to let it go. He told me, "I'm just playin' hahaha" and started walking away. I told him it wasn't funny. He said, "Yeah it is- don't you see me laughin' bitch? Hahaha, I will shoot you!" I proceeded to tell him, "Love over hate... You need to grow up." He shouted some nonsense and stormed off.

It wasn't until about half an hour later my nerves finally caught up to me and I realized what happened. At first I was angry with my self thinking I had an opportunity to drop the kid and remove the weapon- to call the police and teach him a lesson. I suppose it all happened as it should have... And more I am trying to think, "WWJD" What would Jesus do? A Master of divine realization, would he have acted violently? I don't think so. I prefer nonviolence... The child only brandished the weapon discretely, he didn't point it at me. Had he pointed it at me I think I would engage physically. It's a different scenario... I pray God grants me the strength to handle future encounters wisely, quickly and with Loving Spirit. With firmness and ferocity if it is Gods Will, but always with a cool head if I can help it.

So why am I sharing all this here in the dream journal? Well one to catch you up with everything... And two, not to long ago I dreamt I made contact with a "greater being" and I think the connection has something to do with all that has been happening. A greater being doesn't necessarily mean good or bad... I do think it represents a "larger self" or a part of "God." I am still recording and journaling my dreams elsewhere so here is a portion from that entry... The experience happened sometime Saturday night/Sunday morning. The dream journal shows a timestamp of 5:55
 
blinding light being
5:55 AM - 2 days ago#2144
in the first part of my dream i met a being who had a sun inside of him. the light was so bright it was blinding and flooded my entire vision, i could barley keep my eyes open and look.
i woke up and it imparted a message.


------------

Unfortunately I was too tired to record the message. I experienced a hesitation before falling back asleep like a part of my self was demanding I record the dream right away so as not to forget. It's interesting to note the message came immediately after I woke up. Instead I fell back asleep. Also interesting is that, though I did not see the being again- I did dream about him the rest of the night/into early morning. I was on a spacecraft in the next dream cycle trying to tell people about the being- and from that dream I descended into regular dreaming while telling people at a grocery store about the being. In both dreams no one really believed me. I'm okay with that.

While I don't remember exactly what was said, I have Faith that what needed to be communicated was indeed received(like downloading data). God sent me a wink later in the evening to confirm this had been the case, using a personal totem to deliver this message.

Considering the chain of events, and the deep desire to embrace my God-given gender and learn how to be a better man... I think these instances are all connected and serving a higher purpose. Well... the journey goes on, and I just hope I am practicing those deeper desires- which in turn are creating harmony in my circles.

Cheers for now.  :)

pilot license, drugged and operated on

in the first dream, i am driving a highway to an abandoned lot. i am looking for a facility that is going to teach me how to become a pilot. the skies are dark and the lot looks empty, its like an abandoned junkyard- just a lot of brown dirt and mud hills. i park my car and know im at the right spot. i walk over a mound and see on the other side a facility. it's the right place. inside the facility i see my aunt tammy(my uncles wife) and she and the few others are completely naked. there's absolutely no sexual energy here, it's like a shared male and female locker room. they're going to teach me to pilot a small craft in order to get my license. the facility has everything i need- food, a bunk for sleeping... even iced coffee. the machine for the ice coffee is really strange and my friend david is there rushing me telling me how to use it. i punch him and tell him i'll figure it out. when it comes time to pilot the craft i choose an old fighter jet the f15.

before waking up i remember being in the cockpit and going down the runway with it. i remember my instructor, he seemed like a famous actor of some sort... and we were communicating back with the tower. this was his operation and i noticed people were very casual over the radio. this part of the dream is blending with my hitting david trying to get ice coffee out of this very futuristic machine. it is assumed a lot of time has passed with my staying at this facility.

i wake up... it's 4:15AM and i have a busy day of work so i decide not to record and be bothered by bright lights but instead go back to sleep. as i try to fall back asleep i am recalling my dream, i am confident i will remember it.

when i fall back asleep, the second dream is harder to remember. there are scenes... and it ends with being operated on- my grandma who has since passed is there watching the operation with concern.
in one scene i remember a woman martial artists advancing through a series of obstacles.

in another, and this is very lude- is a attractive hispanic woman messaging my mom. my mom is put off and hides the phone. i ask her whats going on and take the phone to see this girl is in a movie theatre texting who she thinks is my dad or a man pictures of herself topless. suddenly i'm there like watching a movie, there is a black guy having sex with her in the movie theatre- he is holding up cash and she is exposing herself on camera. the feeling is she is soliciting herself. its a very gross feeling and im following this girl around for some reason- she is being used by others for money. someone's last request is for her to touch a donkey inappropriately. its like i am there witnessing, like i'm a ghost in the scene. i am both grossed out and curious to this girl. she's there emotionless going through the motions. its very upsetting actually. i start thinking this is animal cruelty.

in another scene i remember someone cheating in basketball and being discouraged. i tell whoever is there why should i bother playing if this person is going to cheat regardless.

by the end of this dream i am on an operating table. my cardiologist is there. the hispanic girl that was there doing things for money is my nurse. someone, before my cardiologist came in to operate- had drugged me. in fact, before being operated on i was walking around this building extremely high. this operation took place in my mouth. the nurse injected blood into me. and she was surprised to see blood coming out from a corner of my mouth. there was a technical term used here but i can't remember... but she wrote it down, something about what she was witnessing was strange and not a part of the described operation.  it's 6:45am and even though it's only been just a little over two hours it feels like a lot more has happened in this dream recall.

and i remember the idea of walking around high- like someone implanted this in me. i don't remember getting high, and this drug is way more potent than any kind of marijuana. on the operating table, the doctor tells me to look at this static black and white screen- there is a buzzing and vibrating happening in my mouth. there are numbers on the screen. first its 10 seconds, then its 59 seconds- then its 40 some odd seconds. my grandma is there to tell me that it was actually a 3 hour operation, she is a concerned onlooker. during the operation i feel the doctor and the vibration and im hallucinating that my face is being ripped off. its terrifying- i know i am under drugs and that something about this isn't real- but i still feel the fear. i get these ideas of pain. and the drugs are taking the pain into warped heights. when i come out of the operation the doctor said something implying that i chose to do the drugs or was going to go trip on drugs after the operation... none of which i can say is true. it was another idea being implanted in me...

my grandma was there to comfort me as i was walking around what had to be a hospital building. its strange i felt like i was in DC and before i woke up i saw these buildings facing each other. four buildings- a north, west, east and south. i saw hillary clinton there and she was explaining something to me. as much as i don't like hillary clinton she saw something in my eyes and took a liking to me. i saw something in her eyes that suggested compassion... she had deep vibrant marble blue eyes. in waking life i think this woman is quite evil. she was impressed i noticed the buildings, for whatever reason. and asked me what i thought about them. i said they were nice.

i wake up....


some notes, strange obervations...
before this dream yesterday during work i felt a pin sensation in my left arm. the small prick of pain actually had a red rash around it, exactly in the spot where someone who receives a vaccine would go. not sure if this operation is connected...

i am wondering if i am dreaming in any way of my nights at the hospital and the psychiatrist who tried to prescribe me way too much xanax. i never wanted the xanax, i wonder if this is related?

also interesting to note was instead of drawing blood the nurse was putting blood inside me... and that blood was leaking out of the corner of my mouth- though she put blood in my right arm...i felt a sensation in my left shoulder/veins after she did it.

there are others in our dream community log who are also experiencing being operated on by ET's(it's all being recorded around the same time). 

I wonder Eric have you had dreams that seemed so real that when you were ‘ awake’ you had to recognize that your thought of what happened didn’t correspond with waking life? I had such a dream about thinking I was corresponding with someone who loved the arts and recognized that person didn’t exist so I must have been dreaming it.

Hi Steve.
I'm not sure I understand. Maybe we can chat about it over the phone sometime. Steve I had a 24 hour bug and slept all day yesterday. I vaguely remember having a dream with you in it talking about meditation.

My dream from two nights ago:

captive animals, an upgrade

i had birds and squirrels in captivity and didn't know it. i completely forgot about them and it was very depressing because i wanted them to be healthy and happy.

i remember seeing my friends who also had caged animals- but they seemed happier. i was learning how to take care of these critters and being taught a lesson.

there was the strangest ant who suddenly started extending its neck, up and up and up... it was beyond the capabilities of anything i'd seen from an ordinary ant. until suddenly it was transformed into a small black and bronze tower standing about 4 or 5 feet high.

it was giving an upgrade to all the animals around me.

i saw a chicken and a cat hunting with a lion cub- together. they were learning self reliance.

some of the birds in the cage died... some were starting to fly again.

overall i did not feel good about birds in cages.

there was another scene with a young man learning his independence- and he pulled me out from this group and we started dancing together. he was trying to grab the attention of the ladies in the crowd.

the idea here is others need to advance around me. i think i've been too much about my self, and not ensuring that others are also growing successfully.

before i woke up i saw my boss sharon who had a very large tank with many birds and squirrels in it. they were very happy compared to the dismal state i had found mine. again i believe there's a lesson here on creating a friendly and or suitable environment for other life. maybe it means to create the environment for my coworkers, and friends and family.

This one feels like something is communicating to me. I woke up to the song War Pigs playing in my mind... And I randomly selected a video on youtube to listen to the song. As it started up I got intense chills in my spine, it is a sign something is communicating... And Really strange my dream, before waking up- involved a girl communicating with unseen beings on the radio and she is walking away with something red in her hand- Just like the girl in the music video. While watching I got really emotional and tears were rolling down my face... I think what's being communicated is there is a lot of rage... And desire for freedom. There's a lot of cruelty happening... And seeing the word freedom at the end of the video is what my Soul longs for.

I would also like to add... that I've visited Hawaii a few times where OBE's are concerned. One AP experience I remember is actually being in and sensing the environment through the eyes of another male body living in Hawaii- I wonder if this person really exist and he is like a type of portal or anchor for spiritual experiences/point consciousness.

With the dream below. I don't think it's a nefarious communication- but it feels like they are upset by our world affairs... I don't know... Well, I don't share here regularly anymore- but do maintain my journal elsewhere and have been active on other forums regarding astral experience. That being said another forum member at astralpulse just had a dream where he or she was visited by "Deer" humanoid type beings and they imparted a message to him or her. It also involved rage and transformation. There are greater "themes" connecting us all.

Here are the dream details...

Rapid fire dream successions. Theme of communication happening over Radio.

First I remember my Sister acting so incredibly rude, hateful and manipulative. To the point we are fighting. I think she is begging for attention. She keeps trying to hurt me and frame me. I throw a foldable chair in her face and I think it breaks her nose. She is working heavily with Mom through something. I feel bad once I see the chair make contact with her.

Later I dream I am Miley Cyrus's assistant. I won some contest, or something. And she puts a song of ours on the radio. I don't know she does this and I don't like the song. If she allowed more singing... Instead she is focused on a kind of rage/punk screaming. It's a mixture of rap, singing and screaming with a male and female energy(I am the male and Miley the female). Britney my childhood friend hears this song with her girlfriends. My Sister hears it too. I think they are surprised I am even at this level of recognition. They just think it's cool I am on the radio. The radio... This feels important.

Shift to a room, possibly somewhere in Hawaii. I am loading a pile of gift cards with value of $20 for her fans.

Randomly  ... I can't tell if this is before or after the helicopter scene. I believe I'm still Miley Cyrus' assistant. Does she have a daughter? We're still in Hawaii, like we're on vacation. There's a little girl walking up to these speakers on the floor. They are emitting a strange sound. It's similar to the noise you used to hear when turning the knob sifting through radio stations... A low static noise. The girl is now speaking to someone in the speakers. They are on the other side and they are listening. I can't see anyone. It's a little freaky watching her communicate with unknown beings, except the static on the radio is actually responding to the child. Low distortions replying back.

Before my parents come up to the room the girl is forced to cut a rabbit, it's magic in that it doesn't bleed- and she cuts it to hide whatever has been going on in secret communication. The white rabbit fur transforms into a smooth piece of sofa furniture. A very odd detail of me zooming in on her manically cutting this talking rabbit, until there's nothing left except a red organ(something, 'inside out') which she walks off with in her hand before disappearing.

Another shift and I am again being observed by my peers. My Sister and her friends. I am jumping out of a helicopter into the water towards my friends Rob and Chase. They are already in the water. The helicopter gets a little lower and I dive in and off to the side. I motion them I want to race to the other side of the water where there are people cheering. The ocean becomes a pool with roped lanes and we are racing to the end. It's a close race, my friends had the advantage having started off straight- whereas I had to jump out of a helicopter and correct my positioning. But I use this momentum to catch up. Chase starts to drop off and it's between Rob and I. I just beat him by placing my hand on the end seconds before him.

Wake up to pee.

As I recall everything and try to go back to sleep,
War Pigs by Black Sabbath starts playing in my mind...

https://youtu.be/LQUXuQ6Zd9w

steve i had a dream with you in it. for entertainment purposes i will share here,

friend Steve, aunt hosting a party
the first thing i remember is being somewhere where a kid threatens a group of people with a gun. i'm not afraid, just tired of the bs. i wonder why i don't do anything about it. this time i decide to stand my ground, the kid shoots me and i lay down pretend to be dead. he then stands over my body and shoots it a couple more times to make a point. once he's done, i stand up- as if unphased by the bullets, grab the gun and shoot him.

after i remember meeting my friend steve out of state. he is in a large RV and we're driving it back to PA where my aunt is staying. i talk to him about the kid with the gun, he tells me the same thing happened to him. i remember this really large RV being parked in the driveway. the party has already started. i think steve and my aunt might make an interesting couple at one point. but steve is older than i remember. i walk in the kitchen and everyone is there, aunt is serving up food. i introduce steve to my aunt and my aunt seems unimpressed. steve takes a seat next to pappy my grandpa, and i tell everyone i have been friends with steve at the spiritual portal for some time. steve reveals he is in his 70's and says he looks younger than his actual age.
its a pool party and my high school crush lauren is there asking to speak to april. i still find laurens petite figure and red hair desirable. i get aprils attention because lauren didn't make her self known well enough- and later my shirt is off as i'm about to swim and mom says i got a lot of sun specifically that my back is very tan.
i believe steve is in this dream scene as we contemplate a potential roommate situation.

That was really sweet of you to add the above.

“Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
And the dreams that you dreamed of
Once in a lullaby ii ii iii
Somewhere over the rainbow
Blue birds fly
And the dreams that you dreamed of
Dreams really do come true”

Interesting you would say this;

“some of the birds in the cage died... some were starting to fly again.

overall i did not feel good about birds in cages.”

I was listening to Amma talk once and she said that “birds should not be caged.” It is meant for birds to fly.

Hi Steve. I tend to agree, and feel equally strange when I see fish confined to such small tanks.

Thanks for taking an interest. I think I will share last nights dreams, which might provide more of an understanding with why I am focused on the alligator and discussing unspoken energies shared between two people.

tapping into unresolved emotions?
i come home to find the back door has been left partially opened by dad. i try to take a photo and show him because i was worried the dogs could have escaped and roamed the streets. the sun was setting and coming out from the door. it was beautiful.
after i am transported to somewhere...
i am being told to avoid the meningitis shot. it's being brought into discussion somehow... perhaps two females are impressing this idea on me. avoid the meningitis shot. there's a great emphasis on this, updated information coming out?
i run into my ex brenda. she is drunk and being very expressive with her emotions. she is telling me how happy she was to have learned something while dating this middle eastern man. shes wondering who i've been with since we've been apart. it seems she is solely focused on her self. she tells me she decided she changed her mind about me, and throws her self on me. i am not so receptive, my reluctance is detected by her. she has two roommates. one is there witnessing her advances on me. the idea is there is sexual energy happening all around me. the roommate is touching themselves and brenda is wanting to engage sexually in front of others. instead i am crying internally as we are hugging. really surreal i see white light as tears in my minds eye(blackness or nothingness). she can feel these emotions. i don't wish to engage her drunken behavior, realizing i have very little say in this relationship. realizing i am actually quite slow to open up. the roomate leaves. i am staying the night, and brenda is trying to get something out of me. instead she ends up passing out. i tuck her in bed. there is some feeling here, somewhere in between all this about her work and law. i suppose she is still a lawyer.
the third roommate enters and wonders who i am. she is at first a little aggressive. i find out she works at the highschool i used to go to. it turns out she is a year younger than me and also went to the same HS. she's in her 30's now. there is only a little time spent here...
again there is something about the sunlight i start to find captivating, like it is transporting me to the next dream sequence...
before this happens the roommate in her 30's tells me...
she says sri lanka is flooding. all this flooding is good news because its bringing questionable characters together. she was implying that we are all very strange characters and being forced together by our environment.
when she says that i am in a partially flooded house. there is an asian woman and husband here. the woman comes out and realizes everything around me is flooding. i quickly swim to her because there is a giant and menacing alligator headed towards us. it even lets out a slow creaking growl. i pull my self out of the water and alert her to the alligators presence. we are trying to find highground, it seems the house is crumbling and sinking in the water. we take refuge on a dilapidated chimney. its churning out smoke and vibrating underneath us. for some reason its like we're on a ride because the chimney is not stationary... and it actually brings us at one point to the alligator. this alligator is huge. not larger than life, but very big and intimidating. it has yellow slits for eyes and you can feel its anger.
i wake up, its 4 am...

i think this dream has a lot to do with facing some unresolved emotions. theres been a theme of talking to different females from my past- someone whispering in my ear over the last couple of nights... a lot of sexual energy too.

i think the house further represents emotions and the sad state of affairs being something faced with another person, with outside forces creating the momentum to confront whatever it is needing confronted.

really interesting emphasis on meningitis and the flooding of sri lanka- flooding happening everywhere... and somehow it being a good thing. she mentioned that entire landmasses are being covered in water.

back to sleep

continued dreaming,
disturbing visions.

i went back to sleep and dreamt of my friend javier being forced to babysit and teach this child required curriculum with the woman demanding her unrealistic expectations be met. she basically wanted the child to do 4, 5 or 6 different things in a confined amount of time. it isn't enough time to learn anything.
i am helping javier by watching what is happening and suggesting we focus on the drawing aspect of the curriculum. we ask the child to draw, he is trying to draw the complete image on two separate pieces of paper, and we have to ask him to redraw it to fit on one. he draws a very good bat(the animal).

later i see my friends mom, tracy. except, her eyes are opened wide and lifeless. i am trying to stare into her eyes to see further. one of her eyes starts moving and looks at mine, only to start moving around on its own again. i am becoming confused and keep staring into the one somewhat life filled eye to understand why i cant see or feel her. finally i ask whats happening and i am being shown three people. one woman is holding her down while another man is raping her. there is a man off to the side slapping her with his penis saying, "keel! keel! keel!" over and over- until the other man climaxes inside her. i see her crying and distraught. the woman explains to me she has been poisoned and is dying a slow and agonizing death.
i wake up very groggy and concerned for my friends mom...

You seem so fortunate to me... to be aware of so many of your nightly sojourns …and in detail. This life makes us recognize how little we know about the future and how little we remember of the past before we came here. But for most of us, even the night is a mystery we have barely uncovered. There is so much more to understand it is a bit overwhelming. Yet i also know there are many things in life that i have experienced that you have not. Isn't it fascinating in that sense? That we can share experiences with our friends that may have never had, nor perhaps even have this life. In that sense we can expand our own consciousness through the experiences of others, we trust and call our friends.

Steve, it's lovely insight you have there. And I see a hidden 14 in the deliverance.

I have been feeling a lot of this wonder lately, with many things in life.

And at the same time, I am in need of humbling my ego.

Crystal Skull

well there were a lot of details that i once again am having a really hard time recalling. it's like a, "tip of the tongue" effect.
i do remember in one scene seeing my grandpa, who is trying to help bag people at a grocery store of some sort. he had a stroke and he isn't doing the best with bagging. taking three items already bagged and double bagging. people don't understand his health problems. i am told everything was fine until they put him in a higher position. even though he is just bagging, there are too many people- too many demands, and he is unhappy doing this.

i remember also being on a train and even spending the night on it. i'm with a group heading to some destination. there's a scene where we are cooking food for these higher ups. we're more like in the lower caste system. a young man is preparing dinner and knocks my stuff off the table. i get mad and knock his stuff off. he gets the idea to tattle on me to these thug like characters. some kind of irish bully sheep herders. but what ends up happening is he gets himself in more trouble for tattling and making them come down to investigate, they both realize there's no issue and the food the kid thought he lost had actually been placed back on the table.

there's a scene about using the restroom and trying to keep things private.

before things start coming together there's one more scene where i am with people locked in a room and having to use electric wire, which we bunch together and heat to melt off some portion of metal on the door keeping us locked in.

later i am back on the train and i believe we have arrived to the destination. the time setting is very old timey cowboy western. i have been given a gift. three trinkets. two earrings, two different kind of bone/marrow and the last gift is a authenticated crystal skull. i am holding and investigating all three at a table with my peers. i tried piercing my ears to wear the gift, but i did not pierce my lobes and people tell me i made the piercing in the wrong spot. and so i decide not to sport the bone jewelry and say i'll wait for my ears to heal before piercing my lobes and wearing them.

the last gift is a small crystal skull. i am so impressed by the quality and the feel. and the skull itself is elongated at the top.  it was missing the bottom jaw, and the skull itself had a smooth feel, it wasn't that the entire thing was crystal- the skull was still yellow/white bone like but everything was smoother than the other bones i was gifted. it also came in some kind of container with a piece of paper explaining its authentication. the "crystal" was actually underneath the skull or embedded in it near the bottom- there was a miniature black pyramid like crystal and behind that was a beautiful jade(?) deep green crystal. it was mesmerizing. i passed it around the table to show everyone. people were very impressed. i am given the gift back at the end.

later i am getting high on the same train with people. i haven't smoked weed in ages and i didn't realize one of the cigars they were passing around was a blunt. i am inhaling quite liberally only to feel pretty handicapped by the end of it all, and i am finding things very funny. by the end of it i accidentally burn myself on my left shoulder and end up laughing about it.

Koan

I had an in-between dreams moment where I overheard two people having a conversation. The dream was about Koan. And one man told the other that there is energy centrally located on the back. Green pockets of energy. Most people are unaware of it.

Later I dream of an old friend eating roasted brown chicken with garlic bulbs. He has a bird disguise, in order to retrieve secrets from some mysterious sect. Like a scroll. Koan is a constant theme through out the night. His bird is red, and his machine isn't working correctly. Although he was disguised as a bird, he was beaten senseless by his own "robotics." I had to save him, as a blue bird, and remind him of the mission. I informed him the machine knocked him out.

There is a dream scene on the beach with my Dad and Sister. I believe the setting sun and the beautiful blues and varying amount of light were representative of a type of healing. There was a mound with little grass. My Dads Mom, Nanny- was there in Spirit. The mound with grass had shaded parts. Some spots were brighter than others. Some parts I could slide down to the edge and behold dark blue ocean.

As I was waking up I noticed the sounds of the rain outside were blending with my dreams. I still hadn't much control of my thoughts. The last thought I remember was a woman being unfaithful to a man, and she had the option to prolong his suffering and in her pleasure she took it at the last minute. This was a very gross thought and I decided enough is enough and it's time to wake up. Instantly I shake this thought off, but figured I'd include even the undesirable moments in my journal.

I believe I will shake all these dreams off now and start my day.

Just want to provide an update to this last dream detail and show you how there are direct synchronicities in our, "waking" life. As we move back towards the source, I believe we start seeing Him in others in unique ways. This being just one example.

I had to take an Uber today to pick up a company van. The driver was very friendly, and we started opening up. He told me he is still holding on to the fact that his wife of 19 years cheated on him. He told me he'd never forgive her. I took it as an opportunity to talk about meditation and finding peace within. This, after he told me he doesn't want to die alone. It also seemed beneficial to pick his brain regarding age differences because there is a young girl in her early 20's who finds me attractive. I have already made my mind up on how best to handle that situation. The direct parallel with my dream hit me when he was asking aloud, why did she wait so long to cheat? This sounded my inner alarms because that is what happened in the dream: "She had the option to prolong his suffering and in her pleasure she took it at the last minute."

I pray for his well being- overall he is in good spirits and despite his words I believe he will find forgiveness. He is 57 and has three daughters, all who make his life extra special and meaningful. He was very kind to me and regardless of what I'm sharing his demeanor was very upbeat. This seemed like one of those divine exchanges.

Well.. What's also interesting is that I dreamt of an exchange and asked what it meant... and the word I was given was Koan.

I think I saw that somewhere before, and so I did a search in the portal and sure enough- Steve has created a thread on it. I've never really read it but I suppose now is the time to pay attention.
http://spiritualportal.net/index.php/topic,7374.0.html

William and his Father, Big Toe- Dandelion/Weed

In the first recall, I am remembering William having his own place and finally feeling a type of reunion into the immediate family unit. His Father, who has always loved him, has allowed himself to see his son again. William is no longer as heavily dependent on alcohol as he was, and there is room for growth and resounding victory.

Later I dream I am somewhere with my Sister April and friend Rob. I am showing them that if I push the sides of my skin on my big toe- I expose the red meat underneath. I didn't want to disturb them, but Rob seemed interested. Like children we were showing off weird body parts. There was a horizontal slit on my big toe which opened up the outer skin to the inner meat/muscles. The jagged edges of skin looked like miniature teeth and I was even able to part the muscles of the inner of my toe further illustrating a cartoon like mouth.

There was a scene here I don't recall well... It's been over an hour since coming back to recall and record. I vaguely remember a woman present, and the energy is like we are in a house among a class of students. I am playing a word game with... I think, Lauren B(the red head form highschool) who is blending now with Brittany D(elementary classmate). She is referencing a type of fish "maschel" some kind of... Creamy sauce... "baucheme" These are not the words I saw in my dream... But trying to recall... Something like, "creme fraiche" the word itself starting with an S... But I remember telling her that her answer was too generic for our little game/puzzle... And while this is happening, there are different layers/levels to this classroom dynamic where I am both separated and independently teaching while simultaneously integrated and learning with a group like entity.

What I do remember are these scenes shifting from here being back home with Dad. I am growing a plant indoors and notice it's finally starting to, "bloom" and is in good health except it is producing a very dank odor. My Dad ask what it is, and suggest it is marijuana. I tell him it is a hybrid of marijuana and dandelion. I wake up with this flower in my mind. I instantly wonder, is this an answer to my bedtime prayer? Before bed I went into meditation and asked God for some kind of clarity around these all day and night heart murmurs/palpitations and dizzying postural changes/syncope. When I woke up from the dream, I said... "Well I'm not smoking weed." But I started doing research on dandelion which seems a better substitute than the milk thistle I've recently introduced to my system. Apparently milk thistle has estrogenic effects which might explain some of the weird energy I was feeling between that and maca. 😬 Either way, I will begin to experiment with dandelion and ashwagandha.

black balloons, ghost, daughter
i don't remember the details too well.

only that it feels like i'm on another timeline. i'm visiting my friend javier and my cousin zach.
we are along a beach somewhere. i am traveling with black balloons. i am given additional black balloons by an onlooker who wants to see how high in the sky i can go.

there is also a vague scene of three people standing in a group with others. the person in the middle is a ghost and doesn't realize it until someone says something. the two standing to his side are the only people that can see him. at first they ask the others in the group why they can't see this person- and someone jokingly suggest it's because that person is probably a ghost. somehow the distinction is made by this ghostly person that he died- and realizes he can phase his arm through the person standing next to him.

the theme of the dream revolves around javier telling me something about a, "different level" and that both javi and zach are being prepared for children.
i keep thinking of a daughter.

what's strange is as i tried to recall the details from this mornings dream, as if to provide me with something which acknowledges the idea of having a daughter
my mind instead begins to play this song, the lyrics playing in my head over and over
https://youtu.be/WECKJ1VzCVA

At 3:33AM today I woke up due to someone knocking on my door 6 times.
They were gentle knocks...

"knock, knock, knock"
"knock, knock, knock"

No one was there that I could perceive with my immediate senses. Maybe I needed to shift my awareness...

Though I was still slightly intimidated(a reactionary habit) I do believe the presence was non-violent and kind.
Unfortunately I did not dig deeper and instead tried to brush off the guest...

Going back to sleep I had violent dreams even though I believe Gurunath was there.
The themes of the dream involved choking and fire.

Specifically witnessing others consumed by fire... and choking out my friend who was physically attacking me.   

Two nights ago I dreamt of Gurunath. Last night, Yogananda.

The dream details,

crowded living space, anger towards dad, yogananda

i dream i am back in an apartment with roommates...
there are 12 mattresses in the living room. 12 people sleeping on the floor, my self included.
my friends javi and jen are in this dream. when i wake up there is a black kitten that comes running towards me. he is very playful.
im living somewhere near the ocean. i woke up early, everyone else is still asleep. except jen comes out from the master bed.
for some reason im trying to sneak out the window instead of opening the door. im having to move jens belongings resting along the windowsill in order to get out.
by the time jen comes out we realize there was no need for me to sneak the way i am.
in this dream, it seems javi and jen are arguing over matters of opinion. they are married, but it seems like they are at a point where they can't stand the others opinions.
i vaguely remember a scene here with a man and a lab coat, he was in the middle of the dream hosting an experiment.

later i am leading people down my street to be entered into a race. they are following me except we take a wrong turn, the race is supposed to be held in front of my house. my dad wrote the wrong address on peoples entry cards. i am trying to redirect the group to my house, they are confused. i have to explain to dad who is in an argumentative mood that he messed up. next thing i know im in a van with dad and we're driving the streets. we aren't in the race but we're looking at wildlife from the van with my grandpa. dad is driving recklessly. he puts the van up on two wheels for turning it too hard. i get upset at him, and there are no animals to look at despite that being our objective. he finds the ocean and drives the van straight into it. he thinks the van is a boat and will carry us afloat. my cousin is there to signal that we're sinking. i am pulling what i can back out of the water... i swim to the nearest actual boat and am greeted by three beautiful and sexy women in their bikinis. i tell them the situation and try handing them pieces of our vehicle, diving down and coming up with parts here and there. the vehicle had transformed from a van into a simple sailboat that had sunk in the ocean. the ocean is green. they accept what i bring from out the water and bring us on board.

somehow i am now in a room with the women and my dad has transformed. i don't notice it until one of the girls says, "aren't you paramahansa yogananda?" and i realize indeed i am looking at yogananda. we are all sitting on the floor in a circle experiencing a type of satsang....

wake up.

biden, ukraine, russia, final moments

There's a gathering. We're all headed in one general direction. Along the way I encounter friends I haven't seen in a while. A few of us barley recognize the other. I see David and he looks so different. I'm told I look so different as well. We head up a ramp and into a room. The room is like a white briefing room with empty tables and empty seats. Everyone is standing.

Once I'm there I encounter a Russian General. We are standing across from one another. He has two men, one at each side, with him. We are saying our goodbyes. It is a deeply heartfelt moment. This is our final moment. He says something, mentioning what many of us are thinking. We don't want to do this. We don't want it to come to this. I remember feeling great concern as we discuss a plan, say our goodbyes, and he steps back to "his side."

I am in the briefing room with my friend William standing at attention. Biden is there, and a woman similar to Nancy Pelosi but perhaps younger. It looks like everyone is staring up at a screen with their mouths agape but I don't actually see a screen. Biden is just staring into space- I ask William, "don't they see this is all an illusion?" I don't know what everyone is looking at.
William tells me out of the side of his mouth, "run." I look at him, wondering why people can't recognize this separation is but a show. He tells me again in a strained, whispered tone- "behind me and run"

I walk- not run, behind him. The younger woman says my name, "Eric" and ask everyone in the room- "where is he going?" I just look at them, say nothing- but feel the awkward energy as I look for the exit- having to step around and come back up to the side of the room. I quietly leave, and go down a hall to a door- there is a great force keeping the door closed. Initially I thought it was locked but I was able to push it open a little- I realize there are people quietly on the other side keeping the door forced shut. I gently knock, my friend David is on the other side- so is my friend Chase and Min. David recognizes me but they are still pushing the door, so I use all my strength and I force it open- "no" one of them says. But it's too late. I've opened the door just enough to slide in on their side.

Once in this space I help them by assuming a position- using all of my strength and body weight, to keep the same door closed. to keep others from exiting the briefing room. I twist the lock and take my position on the floor, looking underneath for any feet approaching.

Wake up to use the restroom. It's 2:44AM.


Later I finally fall back asleep and am dreaming I am again with William. I am in some kind of arcade/mall like setting and it's raining. There's a beautiful girl in one scene and I am attempting to play electric guitar with broken or bent strings. I manage to get out a blues rift and entrance some people to a basic beat. Eventually I lose the ability and am noticing the sound starts to change, so I quit playing. William and I are ready to leave the place. He was in some basketball competition and wasn't doing well. We wait on a curb in the rain, and a young black/brown couple comes up in an opened tram like vehicle. William and I stand up, and the guy points and says, "only him." to which I say, "what? where William goes- I go." So they begin to drive away... "Wait," I tell them- I look at Will and figure it's okay, I don't mind. So he goes and the woman says, "Good. No white people in this car" Really? I tell her, "Lady thats racist" to which she furrows her face and yells as they are driving away- "You're the racist!"

I can only laugh from the awkward confrontation and go, "surrreee"

A group of kids inquire why I was left alone and I tell them what happened before waking up.

yogananda, sri ma, a stroll through the market

i am with a group of people at a table, it is a large group setting stretching horizontally down the table on both sides. in the middle is yogananda and i am sitting across form him.

i stand up and i ask yogananda to explain the concept of, "sri ma" before sitting back down. he defines the meaning, unaware of my plan to grant his sister this honorary title. his sister in the dream is an old woman. i stand back up and explain to yogananda that we will call his sister sri ma. he is a bit shocked. he tells his sister, "do not worry. i will dispel such notions." to which his sister in her ripened age replies, "no. i will accept the title. it's too late for me. you grew enough hair for the both of us." she is somehow joking with yogananda, and everyone at the table, including yogananda is taking the lighthearted nature of their exchange in joy and smiling or laughing.



later, i am observing as formless awareness. we, a lone man sitting in a type of carriage meant to be pulled by another person- and yogananda, are together in a open market type setting. yogananda approaches this man with a bowl which has egg in it and ask if he can pull his cart. the young man is somewhat taken by surprise and agrees to this notion. as he positions himself grabbing the wooden beams on each side he tells the man to grab a whisk and whisk the eggs in the bowl. we stroll through the market and yogananda begins his assessment of the young man. he is asking him questions as he slowly wheels him up and down through various aisles of this outdoor market. he ask the man why no one would want to pull him when the design of his carriage makes him so light. he tells him it is quite an easy job. the man, whisking the eggs at yoganandas request, does not know. the curious thing is they don't eat the eggs being whisked... the first thing yogananda decides to eat is an orange, and he offers a slice to the man before continuing to pull him around and ask him more questions. time passes and the young man is hungry, and yogananda finds another orange- except this orange is already cut in slices and where the fruit would go are a tiny dense bunch of seeds. i believe the young man is no longer sitting in his carriage but following yogananda around as they eat this microseeded orange. the rind of the orange is also dried and edible. the young man realizes whatever they are eating has been pickled and chases down yogananda explaining to him, "these oranges are pickled!"



we are walking some more before i wake up at 2:50AM to use the restroom. i should also include that my friend michael is somewhere in the beginning of this dream, but that i can't remember much more. i believe he(my friend michael) was analyzing a black object, and i was sitting next to him helping him understand something.

I think your dream tonight is simply wonderful and spiritual in nature. Paramahansa Yogananda was often humorous in his relationships with devotees and strangers alike. He also was self effacing in his assessment of situations hie devotees encountered with regards to him. So this dream only verifies this notion. Yogananda gave the man he was helping some ‘ pickled oranges’ . That was very much his sense of humor Eric. Your dream is very spiritual in nature and one to remember for the rest of your life’s days.

Thank you Steve for your reply.

I believe the reason I am having trouble lately is because I am having multiple dreams at once. This to me has something more to do with the nature of reality. Yesterday a man in my dream asked me the purpose of life, and I felt very careful in my reply to him- using choice words and much consideration.

Then tonight I felt I was in another realm of SELF, and met a woman who explained to me some of the nature of reality- all while experiencing multiple dreams at once. Some of my amnesia was explained to me... And this SELF transformation also has a lot to do with the spring season upon us. We are all part of the greater picture.


Last nights dream...

interesting observation, "shedding" energetically

again filled with many dreams and i caught something interesting as i recalled the tail-end of one.
i realized whoever i was initially talking to as i was waking up/dreaming, changed. now i've dreamt of people changing in dreams before- but this felt kind of unique, like i was in a realm of higher vibration- could not sustain it coming back into full awareness... and the girl(whoever she was) she was kind of like a fellow angel/warrior transformed into a familiar character, and the context started to shift.

in the last dream i remember confronting a, "demon." my self and a fellow were allowed to take our angelic form- it was such a relief. like stretching a muscle, we shed our disguise and we started sprinting full speed down a field. it was incredible speed, faster than normal.

this demonic energy was very convincing in that it took aspects of my past and mixed them together, and i thought what i was dreaming was really happening. but i remembered these two separate memories could not exist together, and i did not feel anger towards the energy trying to confuse me. instead i recognized the dream as a type of shedding of the old.

the dream descended into ideas of this demon thing having multiple identities/characters, this building had suffered a major explosion. before its collapse we, my fellow and i- were negotiating with the presence. it wanted power and we'd agreed to give it some.

while all this is happening- there are really weird dreams happening simultaneously with characters from my past- who i no longer talk to. mostly acquaintances from high school mixed with some other friends of old. for example.. while i'm scaling the building, going up multiple floors i am also dreaming of these folks from the past and we are all sitting at a round table sharing answers to some kind of test.

in another dream an acquaintance named max is mailing me letters that belong to him and carrying out illegal activities. i confront him and tell him i'm not interested in him using my address.
while this happens the demonic presence is also confronted by the angelic beings.

it ask for power and they give it to him. my mind starts changing events into rather child displays but the being is filled with gold light to the point where it becomes possessed.
the child translation is that it became possessed with the desire to sing christmas carols and it left the building to go and fulfill its new obsessions.

at the same time this is happening i am dreaming of scientist inside the building recreating a poisonous psychedelic substance out of nothing by spraying something on- and extracting something from a miniature human. gold/bronze misty spray.

after claiming victory from the negative breach the separate entities that represent the one being are rounded up and being escorted out bound together. their mouths open and it's like an incoming call from another world is taking place- imagine being on the phone but there's no phone, and whatever someone is saying is coming out of the mouths of these separate beings, one at a time until the sentence is complete. basically this "phone call" was asking about what happened and whether certain actions would be allowed and what test they could explore next. the beings looked lifeless, staring up into their third eye area/oblivion, mouths agape and the phone voice coming through had this sound to it that felt other worldly.

so this is a kind of test...?
at some point after the building collapse i am sitting on some rafters next to a woman who is the same person described in the beginning of my dream recall but she changes into a familiar face as i start to wake up. she used a particular word that i can't remember, describing something i was doing- because in the dream i am trying to recall what is happening. but as i try to hold on to the word and who she is instead the familiar energy and familiar face takes hold and morphs my environment. suddenly its like im in a different world within dream land residing in a different vibration. but that time of sitting and discussing with the woman was to help me understand that all of this was a transformative process. it's also helping me understand that multiple 'realities' exist simultaneously where 'who' or 'what' we are is operating within these different, 'layers.'

i understand i was being prodded at by this, 'demonic' entity an aspect of my self- just like the 'angelic' entities. and there was nothing 'evil' this was more a hope to get a rise out of me to see if i was still bound to particular emotions from the past.

well anyways... terrible recall the details are so scattered, i've omitted some, both intentionally and unintentionally. but i realize i was having multiple dreams at once, that characters were intentionally disguised, that a type of amnesia is taking place as i wake up and that perhaps the vibrations are just too high for me to retain correctly. (if that's even a thing)...

Sometimes remembering one detail of your dream, triggers recall for the moments prior.

I also remember feeling so much love in this dream, and the girl who talked about Lord Siva... She was very special, had so much joy inside her- and her eyes were more vibrant and alive than anything I've seen or felt in this world.

Lord Siva, reuniting with an old friend

i have a rendezvous with an old friend, who i meet by running into his kid for the first time. i explain to the kid that i went to high school with his father, and the kid is blown away when i show him what his father looked like back in high school.

something just came back to me
before this happened ....

i am remembering a little girl excited- her eyes were so vibrant. so colorful! was she the child i ran into? i am remembering, suddenly, so much love for the entire dreaming sequence. her eyes felt more alive than anything i've seen. she was smiling loudly from the inside! she told me of her joy knowing and carrying lord siva(inside her?). she was ecstatic to know i've seen and met this lord... 

Time travelling with Hillary Clinton

At least I woke up knowing I had multiple dreams. It seems the last few days I've had direct conversations with people.


But I only remember the last portion of my dream before getting out of bed.

I am time traveling, and am delivering food to this guys house which has a really large boat in the water. I am on a smaller raft looking up at this huge boat talking to the man about his fishing adventures. The name of the boat is "something sisters" I don't remember the first word. But it was a double S.

Later I am inside this bar like setting. Hillary Clinton is there and she ordered a beer. It was a giant liter beer and it was frozen, and split down the middle. Then the liquid started slowly spilling out. I'm watching three girls, who are witnessing this- Hillary comes up and starts talking to the girls. She looks younger, but her husband Bill is there too but he is in his present age- older. He looks more relaxed and is joking.

I am very cautious to talk to them, but it gets to the point where Hillary acknowledges and we are forced to talk about a future moment. She knows I'm from the future and she too is time traveling.

Hillary and Bill are overly confident and I don't like interacting. I believe I talk to Hillary with something about the moon.
I wonder if she is in any part responsible for some propaganda... I ask her why she seems so different here and I kind of realize there's a lot of fighting she does in secret that would never make the light of day.

That's all I can remember for now. I think I end up helping her and Bill, or that we are in the past for similar interest, there to accomplish a specific mission...

infiltrating a play, pursued by a spotter, orchestra music and cathedral settings. green door.

i'm talking to a girl of interest and we're talking about whataburger of all things. i'm joking with her that as great as her love for whataburger sounds, that you can't get these long, thick cut french fries like the one i am holding. i then persuade her to perform in this miniature speed play with me.

i remember walking down a cathedral like setting, sneaking the girl around with me- trying to find ways to put ourselves in this play. we are rehearsing and i am tapping my foot, laughing and playing guitar.

the play is about to begin and we have to insert ourselves into it. a nun is walking across the hall and i tell the girl to pretend she belongs to the school and to introduce me to the teacher. she does this and it works. and this allows us the opportunity to jump upon the stage.

i slide across the stage and am again tapping my foot, which cues the rest of the actors and actresses to come out and begin their very specific dancing. i am playing a tiny guitar very fast, like someone clicked the fast forward button. and the tiny audience really likes it. the girl is there dancing, expecting us to end our shenanigan but i am very happy the audience is enjoying and we continue with the show.

an orchestra is playing in the background of my dreams as i am spotted by someone who recognizes me and knows i do not belong. it turns into a chase scene and i am hopping around, the boy chasing me looks like a blend between draco malfoy from harry potter and joffery baratheon from game of thrones. he has two scimitars with thick gold sheaths, they are a part of his hands. one in place of each middle finger. he is now confronting me with his weapons. i tell him from a distance that those are pretty fancy and heavy sheaths he has. he tells me wait until he removes the sheaths and braces himself by holding his elbows up in front of him. i pick up whatever is around me, a rapier in my right and another thick, curved dagger in my left which was used to deflect an incoming, nearly invisible blow, where a blade sliced through the wind and came at me like a boomerang. this knocked the dagger out of my hand.

the chase and music intensifies and suddenly my pursuer is being assisted by the other actors on stage, the girl has kind of disappeared. instead of a sword. i am now carrying a bow. i don't want to harm anyone else but i shoot in rapid succession arrows at the people on stage, locking them in position and use them to climb up and over them. i hear the music as i come across a constant flow of cascading packing peanuts. i see my friend min walking across and i know i am to jump down and pull myself through the waterfall of white foam. i do this and lose my pursuer, pulling myself through a narrow tunnel and come up to a green door.

the music begins to fade and the only thing i remember seeing now is this green door before waking up.

It's now 2:30AM... and I finish recording this dream by 3AM. Time for bed again.

strange metamorphosis... self assembling kitchenware with a personality turned into boy married to a goat named wendy

a woman enters what appears to be my house, she looks similar to my childhood friend hannah. she has taken it upon herself to help make life easier for mom and i. i recognize her acts, she is sitting next to me on the couch kind of shy. at first i ask mom if she notices all these kind deeds our new house guest has performed for us. in our solitude i recognize her effort with a sign of affection and intimacy. at one point i hurt her, because i tell her that there'd been another girl. when i say this it's as if she's on the other side of the door, telling me she would have never tried being so close if there was ever a sign of another woman. but she comes back in full force. i explain to her that it's not what she thinks with the other girl. at first she was taken aback... but now she's topless and asking me to embrace her. my sister and mom are peering in from the hallway, being a snoopy lot. but once they see me embrace her naked body they look away, and the girl wants me on her breast. she is fully exposed with her arms wide open. she is more dominant than the shy act she was giving and i feel a lot of loving sensations as i bring my head to her breast. somewhere in this dream dad is trying to drunkenly recall a scene from jurassic park to his friend. the kind gestures the girl performed involve hanging up cards over the fireplace the way mom likes, or helping clean after dinner.

things get really strange here once the girl and i embrace. suddenly i'm a bunch of kitchen condiments and silverware having magically assembled in the guise of a human. i have a very colonel/reginald cartoon styled voice. my wife(the girl from above) has been transformed into a black baby goat named wendy. as the self assembled kitchen condiments i step outside our country house and instruct what would be my hands to move about as i talk in a funny voice and tell this guy to, "get out of my shoes." apparently i am with a small crew and we're about to go to work- and this new crew is suspect of me. they should be i am poorly assembled and overly clothed to hide that i am actually a bunch of kitchenware. once we get in the truck we're sent off to work. the man driving us greets us good morning and says he didn't want to tell us about our job spot because he didn't want to rob us of a good nights rest. he laughs. once he says that it seems everyone knows where we're going. my baby goat wife wendy is in the truck with us.

on the way to the job site the truck is pulled over and someone writes free goat on the highway. an asian woman in an old school white mitsubishi eclipse pulls over and takes my wife. i am left chasing her like an old man, where a 5 pound dumbell appears and i hurl it at her car. i am exclaiming she can not take my goat- and she is insistent she did not steal it. wendy comes running out of her car towards me and knocks me over, i'm no longer a bunch of condiments and silverware but i seem to be a boy hugging his goat. people realize the goat did not belong to the asian woman.

wake up.

I've been having very strange dreams lately. I gazed at one of Caseys crystal captures just before bed, she is now receiving names with the beings she is able to take photos of. This one is Antae Ibix:
(https://consciousnessexplorationblog.files.wordpress.com/2023/04/screenshot-2023-03-13-at-4.44.51-pm.jpeg)

And so I had a dream about an alien encounter. I am realizing a couple things.

One... Whataburger has appeared again in my dream... And two... Consciousness IS. Where we reside(within consciousness) in our dreams is not always the most accurate reflection of reality but our minds interpretation using familiar symbols. For example... In this dream I saw orange monkeys, foxes and pumas. All orange. But I think I might have been in a foreign land and witnessing creatures I can't possibly describe and instead am interpreting these creatures with what's familiar.

I also wonder why Whataburger appears routinely when I don't even eat fast food. I believe perhaps this the help of a higher self or spirit guide, using recurring symbols to help me try and become lucid in the dream. Since dreaming is usually an automated process, but I think something is trying to help me wake up during the experience.

This dream had a lot of shock factors that tried to wake me up in the dream- like witnessing an alien, flying or floating when needed, and environments shifting with no logical order to it. When things don't make sense in dreams we do strange things- like I recently had to cross a jaggy rock formation in my car. Realizing this was impossible I got out of my car and folded it up like a suitcase and walked over the rocks before proceeding to drive again.

Yesterdays dream I was magically assembled kitchenware disguised as a human personality.

Just this mornings dream I was somehow in an 18 wheeler viewing out of the window like I was in an airplane. I think again this has a lot to do with how our mind interprets roadblocks in an unfamiliar landscape, using symbols and logic we have derived from our waking life in 3D. Or even, it could be an attempt to help us become lucid during the dream...

Anyways, here's the dream detail and my alien encounter:

whataburger... again. reptillian? angel/alien species


two girls are interested in pursuing me. they are all friends and belong to the same group. the first girl i politely decline. the second girl is very insistent, and her friends are encouraging her to continually ask for my number. her friend pushes her along and tells her to hand me a yellow flower. i am very hesitant, but the girl musters up her courage and ask me. i decide that i will. but somehow just before getting my number i explain to her i'm financially dependent and live with mom and dad. instantly, the girl who encouraged her to get my number says, "nope. no way nevermind." i tell her friend, "well i guess you know everything you need to know about me." and she writes, yes - no on a paper and checks off no. i tell her i hope her ego feels better, that next time i'll stick with my gut and say no as well.

moving along, i am looking at this guys truck. its huge, i ask him how he could ever afford it. it's very stylish, and it's almost a monster truck. he says his insurance actually helped secure it, and he won it for following whataburger on social media.
(say... there's whataburger again... what's this all about? i don't even eat fastfood). he shows me the back seat has a custom design on the side door, a basketball hoop and a place to put your shoes which you can zip in and keep secure. i am impressed.

now we're in the back of huge 18 wheeler and its time to go. i'm with my dad and his friends. we notice the gas is leaking from the inside. greg is distraught and we do what we can to correct the issue, one of the guys notices all we have to do is push something in place. greg turns into randy here... and before we leave randy checks the bottom of everyones shoes- he's so mad about the gas leaking in the 18 wheeler, and he goes line by line. my feet are kicked up and he comes by and notices something on my shoe, he taste it, grosses himself out but realizes i'm not the culprit. we ask him what this is all about, he says someone intentionally sabotaged our transportation and he had it in mind to shoot the culprit. the guy sitting next to me gulps, "he almost shot you. and your dad is his best friend."

we're in a hurry now and we get a move-on. randy knows a way to save us almost 2 hours entirely and takes this huge 18 wheeler off road and on a custom path, it is a dirt road and we are definitely on our own out here. it's really strange because we drive by what looks like orange monkeys and foxes. what an interesting farm. on the other side we cross some pumas. there's a lot of wildlife out here, and they're all mixed together. william is sitting next to me as we are driving by the unique scenery, which i am entranced by. i get an email from kamala harris talking about lone star beer. all it says is, "this is lone star beer" and a picture of a case of beer. i wonder what the heck that's all about... and i get the courage to tell william, who is dozing off during our long truck ride-
"william... do you like kamala harris?" william is black and i tell him kamala harris is kind of an embarrassment for first black female VP. william couldn't agree more.

we turn the bend and come across a descending hill with giant black ancient trees on each side. i take note of randys driving skills, and am surprised an 18 wheeler is even able to drive off road like this. we begin our descent, and the scene/environment kind of changes... it's as if i'm back where the first portion of this dream recall took place... and randy has switched back to greg and his friends are still investigating some source of sabotage.

two guys are walking along and notice what looks like a secret room, it's a white room and we're wondering how to get to it. gregs friend task me with the job of finding this room. somehow i float up and am looking down trying to get inside. i see a place for me to land and its surprisingly filled with dogs of all kinds, on the upper level of some platform. one dog comes to sniff me but i keep moving. i am getting closer to this hidden room. i push my self through and i can feel a gaze watching my every move increasingly uncomfortable with my pursuit for this layer of reality. i think i find the room i am told to look for. it's hard for me to describe the environment. but i stumble down a tunnel and end up in a very creepy hall- it's wide open and you can hear a pin drop, i am looking around and walking backwards and notice a dinosaur egg in the hatching process. "WHAT?" that's unusual! suddenly i bump into a reptile/human dinosaur hybrid. he is startled. i am startled. i don't even wait one second. i jump off a ledge and have wings to glide back to safety. he is pursuing me...
i punch through some wall and end up back on, "the other side" of reality with greg and his friend.
the creature is no longer the same dinosaur i bumped into but he comes out from the wall as a giant angel with long black thin horns. he has something black and glowing in the center of his chest and everybody in the dream is shocked by this alien appearance.

wake up.

saturday i was sent home early for being sick. i had intense covid like headaches but did not have covid. i think i had a 24 hour bug. anyways, that saturday i practiced the gateway experience for an OBE. after watching the Why Files- i remember the narrator describing "clicking out" and i think that followed me into my dreams. saturday night i can not recall any dreams because of intense body aches and constantly waking up and readjusting my body. last nights dream feels like i encountered some kind of alien technology. it felt so real, and like a life on the other side of the veil. as if its all actually happening... the details are lost in translation. when i woke up everything started fading... so this will read more childlike than the actual experience...

pale skinned, icey blue eyed red phantom. wolverine. metal and telepathic communication
i wake up and the sickness is gone.
interesting dreams.... the details are beginning to slip fast. i will try to recall, this is more a summarized version and missing what i think are crucial details in-between scenes.

it starts with a female who has been following me. we are trying a romantic relationship but it doesn't really work. i don't really belong to her. she is trying to process this. there is a scene like she is at my house, looking from the outside. in total there are three women- two were distractions. but the one who is trying to process sees a pale skinned piercing blue eyed girl like a phantom. she has a bright red cloak. that is my woman. and she is there more like an apparition. the girl see's this, realizes this, and tries to explain to me she knows there's someone else.

later i am on a mission to capture someone. i believe i am dreaming as the phantom girl. we are a small group infiltrating my neighbors house. we are successful getting in. we are undoing whats been done, like a brainwashing by some cult leader. someone in the group demands we watch this video which will help explain things. we neutralize the scene and are waiting things out and watching whatever it is on tv. an intruder ends up coming in the house... we capture him. he tries stabbing us with a knife. i pin him down. there is a lot of violent, strong arming.

we take our captor outside. i am trying to teach him something about the clicks(i think this has to do with my recent 'gateway hemi-sync' videos). i train his brain to click out. the guy has successfully learned whatever it is i am trying to teach him. he starts by hitting his head with a stone, and nothing happens to his head. he then places an electrical charge by his feet and some coin and goes to pick it up. he does and nothing happens to him from the electrical charge. he and another male are smirking now, because they both have learned this same ability through me(the phantom). he explains, "its like something inside me knew i wouldn't get shocked."

that evil smirk though, this capture was a ploy. the boy who helped me infiltrate the neighbors house, it was all a rouse. he had people with snipers outside- except they weren't bullets and the entire group was actually there for me. the one guy on the adjacent roof had someone in his scope and shot a concussive blast right at their forehead. there is a male leader in this group, standing up now that the shots been fired. he looks kind of like logan from wolverine. the boy tells me to go with him, that we've been caught. the scene i remember is the wolverine leader in front of my house pulling the girl up to his waist. it's like they're communicating telepathically.

next thing i recall... i(or this phantom girl) are in a hospital bed in a daze. there's a paper next to us with all these names, and these tattoos of names on my forearm are just disappearing before me. who are all these people, how are they just disappearing like that? the wolverine like guy comes up to me and rolls his sleeve up. he places his forearm parallel to my forearm. i can't move my arm. and suddenly i'm hearing a metal whirring noise. i can't tell if he's taking something from me, or giving me something. there's like a metal piece underneath both our forearms connecting- and becoming more and more visible under the skin. it's squared and identical in shape. whatever is happening, all communication/data.... all relevant information is stored in this transference/synergy/connection. i feel a powerful surge, hear a loud metal noise just before he pulls his forearm away from mine and i wake up.

Thanks Steve. I still intend to watch the videos you posted. Presently I am in the living room and we have a movie blaring in the background. I just wanted to share that I think sometimes dreams can be warnings too.

Here's the dream as I recall,

amazing drum skills, cocaine

i don't play the drums...

but in last nights dream i was playing the drums in a very appealing way. it was an extremely creative rhythm.

by the end of the dream my first gf's "friend" art was there complimenting on my drumming and i smuggled a sock with cocaine the old fashion way... which excited everybody and we did cocaine before i woke up. the color of the sock and everyones clothes were black.

i went to bed really late(for me) just past midnight, and woke up just before 6. very little sleep.



---------------------------------------------------------



And here's my interpretation later on...

This morning, I did a little research on my dream. Curious to potential meaning. https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/omtalks/group-log-document-your-daily-dreams-log-only-t1618-s2445.html#p28582

It started coming together later on. One, I almost had an episode at work and had to run and grab my black compression socks. The black socks have been a thing today, I thought about the dream again when I was holding my regular black socks after working out.

Two... Basically, I have to be carful with what I'm pulling out of my ass(Smuggling the drug out for others the old fashioned way. Not seeing reality as is but creating desire webs/wants).

It seems I am enjoying a different rhythm, or learning how to get used to one.

And the cocaine symbol is a dangerous element, suggesting to be cautious with my desires. I am energetically pushing my lesser desires(mostly sexual) out in my circles, including where I work and perhaps it is becoming noticeable by others. And even though it may seem exciting(humans being drawn to drama), it is not a healthy thing(a drug)... and considering the reality of the different situations it might even be a potential breach of moral conduct.

I don't pretend I am a saint, and I don't admit to having the answers.

But trying to form some meaning I think it might be wise to transmute the sexual desires in a more agreeable or creative manner. I hope I can create harmony and not chaos. Sometimes I struggle with wanting to appease the little self. Life is short... and all too often, the what ifs excite me.

However... I think this dream is a forewarning.

I've read a lot of wisdom from HIK(hazrat inayat khan) and I can hear his lessons on the spirituality of renunciation. There is a greater self we aren't always aware of, and the joy from that realization is often described by PY(paramahansa yogananda) as ever-new bliss. I don't think that realization is preoccupied with lesser, carnal desires. But I also remember reading that true renunciation comes when the soul is ready... If you renounce something not because you actually want to but think it will shortcut you to selfless awareness/Self Realization, it just won't happen.

Indeed I have strong carnal desires at times and even seek a little promiscuous activity from feeling bored or lonely with day to day routine. But... I actually enjoy structure and have since learned that often ideas are greater than the reality of a situation. Maybe I have to undo what I've already done... Or can change course while I'm at this fork in the road. Choice...

I tried the, "I am not my body, I am not my thoughts" suggestion before bed and ended up having an OBE.

I think there was a female presence observing everything and it was kind of eerie. Not threatening- but overpowering and highly intelligent.

little boy, OBE... unknown presence

the first dream i have is of an intelligent little boy who appears 1 or 2 years of age, but is much smarter than that. he has sandy blonde hair and he is telling me he wants to go in my backyard to pee. my girl dog is there with us, and he(the little boy standing by my side) feels scared. i feel the eerie sensation he is picking up on, like someone is watching us. it's about 1AM in the dream, and so i open the door to the backyard and turn on the lights. the girl dog is running along the fence-line investigating the area. i see a giant bush that does not belong in my backyard, and the feeling like someone is watching us is overpowering. i see an orb of light fly across my peripherals just before waking up. i wake up with the urge to pee, noting the similarities in the dream.

as i go back to sleep i have an OBE. it comes with ease. i am actually enjoying the tired in between sensation of pulling myself out from my body and getting out of bed. i stand there a little noting to myself, yup this is an OBE. i then glide across the floor, stick my hands up and push myself through my closed door. i go down the stairs and the girl dog is again here, anticipating me. she sees me. i make note that she does. i feel the joy coming from her. it's nice. then my dad comes in the scene, and he talks to me. this confuses me, how can he talk to me if i am out of body? i ask him if he sees me, he says of course. suddenly i am sitting on the couch going through a sequence of dream details that i can't recall. instead, everything feels as if it is actually happening. i am almost convinced i am actually awake and going through the motions with my family in the living room. it isn't until mom and dad are doing something strange and so early in the morning, and the presence of a female unknown when all of a sudden i remind myself, this isn't happening. i say aloud, i am actually laying in bed right now. with that realization i wake up in bed.

it's 5:33AM when i come to log.

In the above dream it was suggested to me that I was the little boy and the woman presence is one spirit that has been with me since my youth. Yes as a little boy I did have sandy blonde hair and I was afraid of my connection to the unseen. I felt phantom touches, smelled phantom scents, heard whispers from people that weren't there. I think I turned it off as a child and had to rediscover things through out life. I believe this woman has been with me since childhood and is letting me know there's nothing to fear.


Last nights dream is interesting because there were so many parallels to my sister in this waking life- and I think of the "movie projector" that is this life and found it kind of amusing that I enjoyed disturbing peoples attitudes and views towards the movie they were watching, bringing their attention to the projector rather than the content of the film...


the dream:

chased with my friend chase. parallels to my sisters real life and dream life. enjoying disturbing peoples movie experience

my sister invites me somewhere(i'm actually meeting her later this morning having been invited to yoga)
in the dream she has invited me to a school, it's an alternate timeline

her voice is hoarse(in real life she was recently sick too)
my friend chase is with me

we're in line at a school in colorado(she went to college in golden colorado and says she wishes she lived there).

it's like a lunch time feeling and we're waiting in line to be checked in at the school. every student there is required to check in using this little machine that scans their fingerprints before allowing them safe passage.

i'm watching the young man infront of me confused by the instructions from the machine, and then i'm next. i'm tempted to just break the machine... i don't remember if i actually let it scan my fingerprints, but next thing i know chase and i are running.

a david harbour look a-like is chasing us down a hall. he has tendrils for hair and reaches up towards the tendril and throws a dagger towards chases feet. we're yelling at each other about trading prisoners of war. he(d.h) yells he'd rather trade a celebrity, i yell to him that he really sucks in this timeline before chase and i proceed to the next scene.

we're being chased now from multiple characters in the dream- it's nighttime setting and we're running across a parking garage and into a movie theatre.
i remember chase taking the lead and going straight into the theatre and across the top towards a back exit.

its kind of strange but it feels like i am beginning to enjoy being chased by so many people in the dream. when i get into the theatre i pause and think to myself i will float across the projector. i blink up into the air with my hands by my side and slowly float across the empty space- and my shadow is cast on the movie for having float across the projector. i hear people complaining that i am blocking the movie screen and i seem to really enjoy this.

wake up. i find it rather amusing i enjoyed disturbing peoples viewing experience- directing their attention to the projector rather than whatever is being displayed on the screen. i wonder if this is because i shared how i understand the 1111 communication takes place- even sharing caseys illustration of conscious/subconscious/superconscious.


EDIT: I fell back asleep and people were coming into my home. People I knew. Except there were two or three kids being mischievous trying to force their way in my house and I had to ward them off. I got aggressive and they weren't certain if they should come in. They were pretending like they needed help and I told them firmly I'm not interested- I could see the one guy in the back eyeing the situation as his buddy was trying to convince me to let him in my house. I knew they were up to no good, and their story was bs. 

Very unique animals in my dreams last night...

There were three I had to choose.

And the details of these animals was astounding.

I chose a white wooly mammoth with icy blue eyes.

I chose a white elephant with a pale blue head.

And I chose a purple jaguar.

The overall message was that these animals are no longer in their infancy- the two elephant animals are full spectrum but the jaguar is in his transitory phase not quite fully matured- but not a child either.

I see these aspects makeup a part of my personality. In the dream I was faced up against a challenger, on more than one occasion and was shown this challenger wanted to cheat- but that each time the cheating meant exposure and failure. I understand that patience and persistence is the only way to succeed with transformative powers. A lot of what I hope to achieve requires changing energy dynamics- understanding reward seeking behavior, impulse, and having the ability to let go of thoughts as they float across the Ego.

teaching others how to pick up 3D imagery on a flat surface.

i'm being taught how to view a 3D image on a 2D surface. there is an experiment in a classroom setting. there is a tiled square and we're supposed to create a cross section in the middle of the square with which we run our big toe across and in so doing we realize that portion of the image has become magnified. i then proceed to lean forward and lean back and realize there's hidden text and the images are changing. no one else has really picked up on it yet. one girl puts her hand in my back jean pocket and leads me back to the paper and ask me to explain again. i can tell she enjoys touching my butt in front of everybody. i try to explain to her and everyone it's like a 3D ruler, where you tilt the ruler forward and back to see a 3D image- people still don't see it, but i start to pick up an entire different world on the paper.

wake up..

Over the last two nights I have had my dreams interacting directly with my "waking" life.

For example... I seem to have developed (potentially) toenail fungus on my big toenail. There's a off-white spot on my right toe. I did some research and found tea-tree oil is a suitable way to combat the fungus. So I took a cotton swab and applied liberally on the spot.

Later that night, characters in my dream were curious what I was doing from earlier in the day. "What are you doing to your toe?" they asked. I didn't realize how unique it was until after I woke up. In the dream I just answered, "applying tea tree oil to help fight toenail fungus."

But when I woke up I thought, how curious... Characters from my dreams are asking me about details from my waking life. It made me question whether or not this life we call "wake" is also a dream.

...As a side note- I have a stress fracture on my right foot. My 60 lbs dog stepped on it in a way that his claws dug into my foot between my big toe and second toe and cracking something near the ball of the foot. It has been over a month and the pain has subsided, but it is still there- making certain exercises a little difficult.

Well in last nights dream, aside from being the subject of a strange experiment- I received medical attention on my foot.

Interestingly enough, the pain feels less as of this morning. Still there, a little bit.

But usually when I wake it up there is a screaming pain for the first few seconds. Not this morning.

So for two nights in a row the "awake world" and "dream world" have become more clearly connected to each other where actions and inquiries made in the place we call reality carry over in the dream world. Maybe meditation is keeping my ability to be present in both worlds alive or is strengthening the abilities of the "observer." It seems like maybe I'm awake in both worlds.

dream with steve, jennifer aniston, beautiful alien birds, the moon contacting earth

i remember being on different websites, all of which had ads featuring jennifer aniston drinking a smoothie. it felt very intrusive and became annoying. there's some kind of chatbot collecting peoples information and compiling stories. i go to my friends website and find the same annoying ad. i find my friend steve from the spiritual portal, pull him aside and tell him that this ad is circulating on every website i've been to. he tells me he'll keep it because he gets paid for every person that clicks on it. it's understandable. the setting in this recall is "dusk"

later i am witnessing a unique operation where a crew of people come together to put on, "20 inch blades on the impala." it starts off like a music video, i see my hs friend jason there in charge of the operation. different characters are rapping and other characters are collecting rims and swapping out the old ones, people move like a racecar team changing the wheel. i am joking when they finish that its time to do it all over again- but the amount of effort it took just to do one was too much and no one finds the joke all that funny except me. there's some kid with blonde hair and we try to joke around with him calling something gay but it turns out the kid actually changed his sexual orientation and we had to put a halt to the jokes.

after this i am walking in a line with a bunch of people. i have an incredible amount of weight on my back. i don't know what i'm carrying but it's heavy. my family is here with me, we're all moving in the same direction. suddenly i hear beautiful bird calls. these gorgeous burnt orange and deep blue birds swoop into the scene. so many fly by me and everyone walking is entranced. i feel happy to have one almost land on me. there are so many birds, and some land on some branches and open their wings- i see black swirling patterns on them. it's a beautiful sight. the blue kind of shifts from deep blue to electric blue. i am walking at a struggled pace due to the weight on my back, but i manage to haul it all with me to our final destination. even though it was heavy, i was able to keep up with the others. the setting at our final destination is again "dusk" and ambient and i am relieved from having to carry whatever the heck was in my backpack.

wake up to pee. finish recording at 2:14am =P happy june 14th.


I fall back asleep and dream I am on a train and notice the moon is extremely close to the Earth. I am told by a few people in the know that the moon is going to crash into the Earth or, "make contact" that night.

Gommorah, Dragons, Terraforming, Invisible World, Mahumaudi

once again, intense dreams- little recall.

the first dream before waking up to use the restroom i am learning about the genealogy of Gomorrah.

wake up to pee.

go back to sleep and i am between worlds, there is an unseen world being radically terraformed. i am ale to walk between the seen and unseen with a few others. i am the one responsible for terraforming the landscape. i manically find these purple expanding octopuses that grow and grow and grow, until they are larger than the towers of a castle. to walk between worlds i go through a gate with others, some people walk through the gate and they are in the other world- some people walk through the gate and they are in the same world, having gone nowhere, except on the other side of the gate. there's some crucial data that i am missing. can't recall it... just know there's a huge chunk around here not being properly retained.

there's a grimey man guarding this gate. when i approach he tries to shake me down for my visa. i am with someone- we are dragons. humans, but dragons. my dragon is gold. i don't know if the other dragon with me is black. there are i think four human-dragons in total. the first dragon walks through the gate no problem. because i am held up i grab the man by his jaw. i put so much pressure his teeth crack. he is still acting like a punk but i've found my visa, which is also gold. as i go through the gate and to the other world the terrforming process has already begun.

there's a young woman who is a red dragon that is trying to transform, but there's an older brother red dragon that is trying to prohibit her transformation process. i see her laying against the castle wall as she is struggling to transform, its like she is being born. the frantic brother is crawling along the wall coming to her. he is attempting to eat her.

as we teleport i also remember a beautiful woman wearing black and green, she was a green dragon. i only see her now with my limited recall in a tunnel of sorts. just the colors black and green. she has jet black hair. she is the green dragon.

i can't remember this well, it definitely feels like i was in two worlds. i think perhaps i've changed something in my self which is the reason for the radical transformation dream. the feeling of the other world is somewhere in London.

as i move closer to a wakeful state i receive a lecture and hear a name. it's the only word i remember.

sounds like this:
"Mahumaudi"

(Just tried Google Translate and it picked up a language called, 'Cebuano' and Mahumaudi translates to- "come back")

But the name sounds more middle eastern- with a harshness in the accent that rolls everything together.
"Mahum" means "Moons Light" ...
And "Adi" - "The One Who Charges" or "Jewel" or "First Born"
and apparently, "Mahamari" means "Killer"

I wonder how many dreams you feel you are getting spiritual training in as opposed to dreams that are experiences? I just ask this because last nite I had this dream in which I was given some insight into how others have seen me, which was helpful. Most likely I’ll share it.

Some people have referenced the place we call sleep and dreaming as being awake. There are messages from dreams, ultimately understood as Self communicating with self.
We don't always remember what we dream, and even our ability to recall accurately can be misconstrued. But there are moments of clarity that often inspire.

It's a practice to develop your concentration, and an ability to be awake in these other realms.

Now is all we have. Namaste Brother.  :)

I suppose that awareness is important in all aspects of our life. Especially since we practice it in meditation. Yet I wonder, is there a time we really need rest from all the minds activities? I have found that constant concentration can also be exhausting.

Of course. Rest is a crucial aspect to strength. What I have discovered is that we have the freedom to choose our battles and to what depths we wish to explore an opportunity. God is eternally patient, and, we may not always understand a message as it comes. We may also decide trying to do so is counter-productive to the loftier goals we hope to accomplish in our day to day. God, in all of His Splendor, is able to relay the same message through different faces and different stages of our personal development. 100 years is nothing to our Eternal Beloved. And there is no one better capable of understanding why you're here and what you hope to learn than you and God.

July 9th 2023

A moment of lucidity, dreaming of going to sleep while in the astral... Descends into powerful dream symbols...

i dream that as i am attempting to fall asleep in my bedroom there is a phone next to me picking up interference like a radio. i listen in and it's policemen talking to each other. the room is filled with dusk, ambient amber light is oozing everywhere.

later i am climbing a ladder of sorts. its more like a symbolic image in the minds eye. at one stage in the upward ascension i am with a young boy and his family who are sitting at the edge of some ledge staring out into water. the water is filled with giant sea lions and walruses and they are an arms length away.

near the top of my journey i am greeted by a woman. she says i am not ready to witness the transformation she brought me through- but she shows me something... it's as if she took me from the stage of a beast and transformed me physically.

somehow, as this is happening, i am standing on top of a mountain in feathery attire. i hold a disc above my head when suddenly 12 very large red dragons swoop down from behind me and rush through my sides. they're extremely powerful, i am filled with awe-
defined as,
noun
A feeling of respect or reverence mixed with dread and wonder, often inspired by something majestic or powerful.

multi-dimensional travel, highway, concert, 777

highway, traveling, concert, parking along the highway. can no longer see the concert. listen for a little while from a distance on the highway. decide to leave.
multidimensional.

place my head against my dads arm and fall asleep(a rare display of innocence and vulnerability shared with my dad).

shapeshifting elements.

the last thing i remember is speaking to a girl. she see's 777. i happen to see or exist as 77077.

i explain to her it isn't so much what we're projecting as much as it is her ability to perceive. in this, in-between, people define what they're witnessing based on familiar concepts- not that they're seeing something for what it is, but creating the image with limited data. so we have a similarity in our projection, 777 and 77077
neither is wrong. and people are defining movement in a similar fashion.

wake up, details begin to fade. i'm trying to remember what i just dreamt but this song keeps playing over and over in its place...
https://youtu.be/Q9G0-4TWwew

classroom setting... healing water, spaceship, beautiful woman

i had a lovely dream i was headed to a class like setting, it was on the 4th floor. i had a feeling i was headed in the right direction. there were 5 minutes left until the bell would ring. though i've never been here, it turns out i was indeed going the right way. so i picked up my pace and made it just in time. this was a confidence booster in it self. the class was atop a building outside.

once i got there  the scene changed, we entered some kind of ship- in order to proceed we had to go underwater and swim through some long narrow way. the water felt immaculate, there was debris floating atop the water and things suspended in the water too. i didn't pay mind, i just moved through them focusing on the sensations of swimming frog style. i pulled through and it was like i entered into a different world. once i get there, there is a woman who seemed familiar, like she was from class- she is placing herself on me. i take comfort in her expression.

suddenly i am remembering a friend who in the dream is suffering from nerve damage in his spine. he can't move around so much. i pull him into me and am hugging him. he is crying and i am placing my hand on his head. i think i am feeling his tears, crying with him- asking him, what can i do for you?

there is not much memory here unfortunately- just that a lot of people were here. some kind of sweets are again present in the dream... and when it's time to go- because i say it will take me 30 minutes to get home from this space, i have to swim back through the water. on the way back i see a black tarp suspended above me and as i exit the water i am floating in the air, there is a woman here showing me how to move my arms and holding some kind of wand that is keeping me suspended in the air while simultaneously drying me off. i look back and there is another absolutely gorgeous woman staring at me. i ask her if i can take her photo. she says sure. she is wearing a sun hat and has long, tan legs. she has a dark green dress with nothing underneath. there's a slit in the dress and her cleavage is tasteful. her hair is auburn. i manage to snap a couple photos and i am definitely entranced by her beauty. she is smiling about it, laughing in her shoulder in a shy but purposeful manner. i am proud i captured her on camera...

wake up. feel great.

>>>just two days ago i went to visit a friend for his birthday. the funny part about this dream is i said i had to leave because it takes me 30 minutes to get home which is what i said at my friends get together. the classroom setting, could have been the get together. the reason i may have felt confident despite not having been there is the age difference from my self and the people attending my friends birthday. this was a fellow co-worker who was considered the baby in the group.

July 28th 2023

Haunted House, Spider Bite, Rollercoaster, Golden Dog Boy, Trombone

It was nighttime in a suburban neighborhood. I was with two other people, we were laughing and having a good time. I don't recall who they were. There was a haunted house while most other houses looked ordinary. We had to pay tokens to participate. There were different levels of haunt. I say I don't want to do the scariest so we enter three tokens which is a medium level haunt. We're enjoying ourselves like we're at a carnival.

The nighttime theme plays through out the dream. There is a wooden rollercoaster I used to ride in my youth called the Wild Cat. It's not so popular now days and so there's no line. I take this as an opportunity to enjoy it and get the front row.

In between dream scenes here I am having to do some errand for my Mom. I believe I am sent to buy a specific produce item. I realize the entire time there is some tiny squared spider, like a crab spider, biting my face. He is stuck to my cheek. I have to pry him off and he takes off a bit of my skin.

Now I am atop the rollercoaster, the scenes blend as I still feel the spider bite on the side of my face. While up there I am approached by a beautiful golden blonde dog. He is so happy. I wonder what he is doing up here. My friend Javier is in the background and kind of moves away from the scene like a ghostly apparition. I ask the dog if he wants to join me on the rollercoaster. He obliges.

As we try to figure out how to make the thing go, being the only ones, I am shown glimpses of the dog when he was a human boy. He was a human boy. A little boy who played with toys, and was made fun of in his community because he wanted to be a toy maker when he, "grows up." I saw the overseer of this community, and the people involved who had shunned this boy. I had no feelings or thoughts towards the matter. I only remember looking for the red button that releases the rollercoaster from the hold and gets us moving.

Oh yeah, how could I forget... An important detail.. I was playing trombone to some festive and live music in the background. I was making a rhythm and dancing side to side. It was a whole lot of fun. I'm not sure how but I was somehow paired with a beautiful female in this dream sequence. I think we are going to be mates.

Wake up.


July 29th 2023

Nicolas Cage and CIA recruitment, Crows

At first I dream Brian is showing me all these cars. Of course he has his Supra, but he has many other Supras too. His friend Moe and others are returning from lunch break and are happy to see me. I suggest to Brian he rents the cars out to people. He has all the cars to do it, and he has the lot. So why not? Easy money.

Later I am somewhere along the beach and see all these people with chickens and dinosaurs. They are like petting zoos for kids, one kid is walking around holding a baby T-Rex.
Nicolas Cage is here with his own property and is approached by a young man who works for the CIA.

We go to some underground facility and the young man instructs Nicolas to kill three black snakes as they are brought out from what appears to be an automated laundry shoot. Nic ask why and the young kid says because I said so. He disguises his hand as a snake and pecks their backs repeatedly until they are dead. "Death by pecking order" Whatever that means...
There is a really cool visual that happens here but before I go onto describe it I will say the young man confers to a redheaded woman in the audience that the old ways really messed Nic up. He says he can't believe he actually killed the snakes just because he was told to. It is implied there was some trauma from old training methods.

As Nicolas Cage finishes pecking(with his puppet hand) these black vipers to their death I see his shadow and a BUNCH of crows are emerging from his being- they aren't physically there, they are just there as shadows. His flurry of movement caused the crows to come out from his being, and once he settles back down- the crows rest back on his shoulders and his head. He is surrounded by black crows.

Wake up.

Sex dream: Titan, Red ambient liquid, Driven by Desire

So... I can try to make the details as PG as possible, what's strange about this dream is- I am at one of my two local coffee shops that I frequent. There's a new girl here and we just stopped and starred at each other for a longer than normal moment in time- and she looks very similar to the girl I dreamt of having sex with last night.

In this dream, this girl has multiple love interest. I am not a love interest, and I am not sure I love the girl- I am driven more so by carnal desires. The thing is- she approaches me. She enters herself into my dreams and leaves me with what looks like a valentines day card. I like the fact that I have a brazen admirer.

The card has all sorts of love notes written inside of it- one thing that clearly stands out to me is how she addresses me:

"Dear Titan,"
This stands out to me as extremely important. It's all I remember from the letter.

I see her and I feel this need, like I *must* have her. And she is ok with this, and she is ok with me pursuing her. She performs fellatio on me in public. She does this to show everyone her intentions. I am okay with this, even though there is a young man next to me asking if he can pursue her. I don't know how I feel about this young man, but he is there standing by the side observing and professing his love for this girl. He reminds me of someone by the name of Tim who I knew in HS.

I don't care at this point how Tim feels anymore, I am driven by extreme carnal desire to put myself inside her. Once I do, there is an energetic exchange between us that feels pretty good and wholesome. Yet there is some questionable energy too. I am not sure how I feel about any of it- except one word would be... Correct. Another... Good. Still, there is some uncertainty lingering in this flowing energy that I see as ambient red liquid with tiny particles floating in a type of suspended animation.

414, Hazrat Inayat Khan, A group starting with S

The time shows 4:14AM when I decide to get up and record.

In the first dream I am shooting a gun with a couple friends on moving targets. It's nighttime and we are practicing leading our shots. I don't want to shoot anything that's alive, we are practicing on inanimate objects. There is a young child hiding in the shadows as authority figures move in and begin hunting us.

After this I dream that I wake up in my bedroom and I am looking at a tall old book which is dedicated to Hazrat Inayat Khan. I'm sitting up in my bed admiring this book. There's a clear plastic film on the outside of the book which is holding all kinds of pictures and a personal note inside. I empty the contents out and am looking at these old timey photos of Inayat Khan. They are *very surreal.* The author has circled with faint, white chalk the different shaped eyes. It reminds me of looking at Casey's crystal photos- there are atleast two Beings imposed in these photos. The nonhuman eye is what is circled in chalk. I look at the next picture and there is something else circled, another odd shaped alien eye blended onto HIKs face. Each photo or painting of Inayat Khan is different, I am looking at different ET's superimposed.


I should also note I feel a fondness for these pictures like I am to keep them by my bedside to be reminded of him.

I hold the last photo of him up and the author of the book had circled something off to the right- but I look and I see in the depths of the black portions of the photo a ET somehow belonging to Hazrat Inayat Khan- but as a completely separate entity whereas in the other photos they are blended together- the author did not circle this one.

I notice at the bottom of the book on its cover there is a note written for me. This takes me by complete surprise because the book is dated something like 1936-1945.

It says something like... There are four winds but only one compass. There are different sects. I am called, or to be included in a group that starts with an S. I think the word or name is Sanjaya. Sanjiit?  S... Something. I can't remember. I'm not familiar with this word.  It was a great honor for the author to bestow this title on me. Even stranger, in this myriad of pictures and notes and other items found under the plastic film are cutouts of a family. The author somehow cutout a Mother, Father, my self and my Sister- and two older dogs. The author hand drew spots on the dogs and wrote, "Sorry I made them dalmatians." (I am a family of 4 with two dalmatians).

This really excited me- to the point I had to show someone. I did not realize I was dreaming- I was just getting up to show someone in the house when Aprils boyfriend started coming inside. I heard them chatting outside my bedroom door. I am eager to tell someone about this book, excited by all these details.

Wake up....


Did some quick research... I see the dream was trying to wake me up. Also. The four winds and one compass thing really stands out to me... Found this:
(https://i0.wp.com/sulukpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/05/10.png?fit=625%2C1000&ssl=1)

This biography recounts the life of Hazrat Inayat Khan in his own words, from his early years in India mastering classical Indian music and studying under Sufi teachers of the Chishti, Naqshbandi, Qadiri, and Suhrawardi orders, to his travels to America, England, Russia and France in the 1920s. During his time in the West he created a school of spiritual training based on his vision of the unity of all religions and the awakening of humanity to the divine within. In his unique form of Sufism, there are no barriers of race, creed, or religion. He did not see Sufism as a religion, but rather a way of life that enhances and fulfills every religion. Additional material and anecdotes from the archives of the Nekbakht Foundation. Published by the Nekbakht Foundation.

Healthy Physicality? Sexual energy, brawl, tank like vehicle

Heading back home! I'm on day 2 of driving, 7.5 hours left until I arrive in Houston.
I was up at 4AM but could not record my dream because I was first up to drive. So here it is, 5 hours later.

Carolina... Brian/Sean... Tank like controls.

What I remember.

I am piloting something like a 6 wheeler, it's an opened vehicle with two joysticks that run between your legs for controls. Forward, back and sharp pivot turns.
Carolina is sitting up front in a shirt and lacey underwear(I don't remember her wearing pants. Maybe a short skirt?). My friend is sitting at my side, just behind me. I can't see who my friend is at this point in time, and in the dream, who that person is keeps changing. Separately(and possibly simultaneously), there is another dream happening where I feel my friend Sammy interjecting his personality and concerns.

The dream I mostly remember is this:
Carolina is stretching, intentionally showing us her underwear. Enticing us with sexual energy. I stop the vehicle, walk over to her and forcibly pick her up and hang her over the ledge of the vehicle. I yank her panties down to her knees leaving her bare bottom exposed. I keep her position bent over and spank her, and spank and rub her 'flower' with my hand. I am being extremely aggressive and find myself even questioning what's going on as an unseen observer narrating to himself. But the mechanical part of me is enjoying this. I am certain she is enjoying it too. It feels good.

Suddenly we're back in the 6 wheeler like nothing happened. I am asking my friend if he'd like to pilot it, but as I ask I see Carolina look at my friend and my friend decides he doesn't want to drive the vehicle. They are giving each other a not-so-secret exchange of sexual energy in their eyes. Anytime I look down or away, or have to use the joysticks to make a pivot turn- Carolina is flashing her panties by stretching her leg out and rolling over on her side. She is doing this when I'm not paying attention, advertising solely for my friend behind my back.

This time I stop the vehicle again and walk over to Carolina and firmly plant my hand on the top of her shoulder. I squeeze it really, really hard and keep her sitting down. I tell her to "STOP behaving like that". I've completely put a stop to this energetic exchange. Then, I turn around and face my friend. Now I can see he is either Sean or Brian, the energy keeps changing. I tell him to "QUIT eyeing my girlfriend!" I tell him to square off. I tell him I'm going to hit him. He stands up and looks nervous. I explain that I don't want to hurt him or break anything but that I AM going to hit him. He takes a wide swing, I step back and realize he is at a disadvantage. He sends a kick with his leg to keep me back, I mirror his action and send a kick to keep him away. And then, I see an opening and I pop him in his nose. He falls to the ground.

The continued narration with my unseen self and maybe an unseen authority figure chimes in- "there, you hit him. it's finished." Agreeing that it's over, I feel this odd sensation of pleasure you can only feel from two boys duking out their differences. Also strange but I think the girl in the dream seemed to enjoy me confronting her and my friend, she enjoyed me calling her my girlfriend and the physicality of everything. Wake up.

Presently I am single and I do not talk to any of the people from this dream.

Before packing up the car this was the first thing I saw/read immediately after waking up from my dream:
Pantsless Florida man, 71, caught spying on neighbor through her bathroom window
(https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2023/08/Florida-man-1.jpg?w=817)
"When detectives interviewed Henning, he admitted to regularly entering the victim’s yard and watching her through the window because he was curious and sexually motivated to see her naked,” Sergeant Amanda Sinni said.
Arresting officers tackled the peeping Tom to the pavement after catching him in the act, seemingly causing injuries to Henning’s face.
His forehead and browline appeared bloodied in both the bodycam footage and his mug shot."
https://nypost.com/2023/08/26/florida-man-david-lee-henning-caught-spying-on-neighbor-through-her-bathroom-window/

I thought that was a pretty unique alignment. And strangely enough, as I was driving the car- this song started playing and reminded me of the dream... And again the energy, "felt good."
https://youtu.be/TXGbhniTBrU?si=XM6FG22AirS3yRFP

Members at the Portal convene

I dream that the members at the portal all meet each other in person. There will be another person who joins us who finds content highly disagreeable but...

It turns out everyone who experiences these stark differences ends up learning something about themselves and eventually all the differences experienced at the board become no big deal.

First there were 4 to 5 members that meet... Then a older woman with strawberry blonde hair introduces herself to me and pulls me into a auditorium. Suddenly the "community" went from 4 to 5 members to about 20 members.

The people in the auditorium were sparse and spaced out, so I think maybe in the future we will have more onlookers at the portal but not active participants.
 

Three dreams. One individual, two simultaneous. William, Steve, Casey- three dreams- junk food, wounded soldier escape, child in class learning about multiple dimension

The one is this weird memory of waiting in a line to order/eat horrible junk food. I think we're at an ice rink/concessions stand. I feel gross in my stomach thinking about it. William is there. I make a comment about how odd it is all these poor choices, though if I am forced to pick I suppose I am most excited about ice cream. Unfortunately there are no normal flavors, not even vanilla. Everything seems overly synthetic and fake. The man behiend the concession has to help me decide and I end up landing on peanut butter. I ask him to combine peanut butter and raspberry, and this causes peoples head to turn like it is some strange and unheard of request. I am eating ice cream for dinner... Until I recognize an employee who has a makeshift HOT dinner with pears in it and a mason jar with chia seeds and honey- I wish I tried that instead. I am traveling with my friend Steve from spiritual portal, and we throw a mattress up against a mound and that is to be where we're supposed to sleep. We're traveling in some kind of old van and this mattress seems to be moving around with us from place to place.

In another dream I am needing assistance, escaping a heavily guarded facility. I've been injured and am drugged. There's no way to escape except for this person assisting me. It's like I was fighting in a war, and he puts a ski mask over my injured face and tells me in front of everyone to keep moving, make it down to such and such place. I barley hear him, I am bloodied and dizzy- but I realize he is disguising me as the enemy- one of these soldiers is serving like a type of security. I have to walk by him so he can scan my arm before I am allowed to pass. The gloves and mask the unknown help gave me belong to someone else and I slide through. I run to the end of... somewhere- like he said, and I see him there and we are climbing over a fence and slipping through a small passage at the top- 

At the same time, I dream I am a child in a classroom hollering out answers as the teacher ask them. We are learning about dimensions... A tesseract... A toroidal field? I keep raising my hand as the teacher ask questions, and I keep shouting out answers. It's like I am an overly excited kid. Sometimes the answers are wrong, but I know the answers- just, the way the teacher presents it means we have to add certain numbers each time. While this is happening, there is a group of people like an armed drill team pivoting in each direction recreating the answers as they attempt to move in unison on something like a basketball court. I have made two drawings. One is with Casey from the GTC forum in a spaceship. The child in me has drawn red energy all around her and the ship and in the space above her. It's a simple drawing but this red energy is swirling and it looks like she is being vacuumed up into nothing. As for a separate answer, a different dimension- I draw doors within doors so that empty space becomes these rooms. Like a sliding kitchen door- but all separate rooms neatly fit into this space.

It may interest you Eric I never sleep on a mattress when roughing it or camping. I’m use to the ground with just a sleeping bag. Although most my friends put down at least a mat …. The ground suits me fine or a floor.

In the dream world, symbols can be identified as having a deeper meaning.

It takes a conscious effort on the recorder of the dreams to understand their waking life and the context of their dream to form a possible interpretation. Sometimes no meaning is formed, and that's okay. Sometimes meaning is given as if from a higher source, meant to lead the individual down a path of discovery and understanding. I've experienced both.

Last night was group meditation at 8PM central. It didn't last long(for me), I guess I was feeling discouraged with my practice. But I tried... And when I was falling asleep(later in the night) I had a unique experience experience.

I began hearing a beautiful violin. It was phantom music, a 6th sense experience. And then I heard a man having a private discussion as if he were sitting in a dim lit booth, a fancy entertainment venue.

He said something about bringing on a European nation and protecting them in the war. I can't remember exactly. It was something like that, and it was implied we are in the middle of a world war.

I had a dream with Steve in it.

First I dreamt that he was weighing his views on the subject of COVID, government interference- and mask vs no mask. He was leaning in favor of mask and separately I think he showed favorability for Government interference with regards to controlling others and to help control spending. I can't remember exactly. Afterwards I saw the word Dragon on the back of a license plate. I've had a dream with Steve and Dragons before. And I think the license plate said something like dueling dragons. What I can remember though is that Steve was giving serious thought to the other side of his views.

I later dreamt he was in my neighborhood and I visited him at night, prior to a road trip. It feels like I am in the astral, and having a discussion about Sufi wisdom. The scene is both at night in a driveway- but there is a separate scene of a mess hall and lots of noise. In particular there is a twinkling star in the night sky implying distance. It's as if we're in two different locations. I mention something about knocking no more than 10 times total in ones life to reset, something. I told him I knocked 7 times intentionally and purposefully pushed my boundaries.

Later I phone him and tell him I've left my car in front of the house he was staying at. He thought my car was this big hummer but I told him it was the small blue sedan. This took him by surprise. Later we went on a road trip with some of my family crammed in the vehicle alongside us. My family and I felt Steve to be an odd fellow. Steve was driving and I told him to pull over because I had to pee. We were pulled over in Alabama and I suggested we would switch drivers every so often- and pull over for whoever needed to use the restroom as often as we needed. Steve says that's a kind gesture.

Wake up.

Mountain top, snowboarding, Castle, Preparations for War, Interesting Woman


A beautiful feeling of being a lone man on a snowy mountain top and I am snowboarding. I saw someone else do it, and tried to recreate the sensation.

Later, I am tending to my castle. There is to be a war soon- and I am making sure everyone in their positions understands their roles. Oddly enough I have cashiers and I am trying to get money for their cash registers.

Later, a woman- she is green skinned and at the same time, extremely beautiful- raven black hair... Orange eyes... She comes forward- I am thinking I must impale her with my Spear. But her Mothers energy appears behind her like a protector- I am thinking her Mother sent her to infiltrate my operation. Is she a spy? I spare her life...

Wake up.

Belonging to Misfits, Carrying out anothers Mission

I dream that I am with a few others and we burn down someone's food stand. We then meet Swami Vidyadhishananda, who is somehow connected to this person, and I feel bad for what has been done. It was somehow a part of the mission given to us, like it needed to be done but in my shame I try to tell him what is still salvageable. I am the only one of the three who takes the time to count the individual garlic bulbs and green pea shoots and explain to Swami there are 120+ garlic bulbs and over 100 green peas still good for sale. This pleases Swami and he blesses us misfits.

"witch of the world" ghostly tap on my right arm to wake me up

prior to this dream i am awoken by police sirens and a car with a deep exhaust. there's a car chase happening in my neighborhood, and you can hear the car with the deep exhaust screech his tires, hit his brakes, and make multiple turns and accelerations. there's about 3 police cars based on the noise i am hearing. eventually they all fade off into the distance and i fall back asleep.

i'm viewing through the eyes of a young man exploring a hotel. in the upper floors he finds a piano and starts playing it, there's an older woman who seems rather annoyed by the young man. he catches on to her presence and decides to leave, descending levels in this hotel exploring different realities on each level. the whole time this old woman is pursuing the man. i remember one level being outside, and a torrent of water gushing down a thin chasm. in this level of reality i remember my friends david l and william. i'm throwing a baseball and in another scene we're in my house- i ask if they want to get high before we walk out the door and pursue our journey.

the young man continues to explore the hotel and is confronted by the woman. there is a violent emotional(non physical) exchange between the two. but the young man tells her to appear as she is, because she is masking her age. she scrubs off the make up, and he says that's better. the woman introduces herself as a witch. and i hear very clearly,
"the witch of the world" and i am made awake by a couple taps on my right arm in real life. no one's here, fall back asleep...

dreaming in symbols
see through lobsters- closed door with overflowing water
i just remember hostile, regular sized, translucent lobsters

gushing water near the bottom of a closed door

a dream from the eyes of a palestinian child

A dream after a dream.

(Just a PSA, if it is necessary. This is just a dream, I am not taking sides with regards to war.)

I woke up and fell back asleep. As I was drifting I started to see a palestinian child sitting alone on the curb of a street. There were two groups of passerbys- and the energy was interpreted from the point of view of the lone child. We felt isolated and unwelcomed. The last group of passerbys were teenage israelites wearing suits. The feeling was they came here and now own the streets and were attempting to bully the native child.

chaotic energy, multiple dreams, cool dream of being a hawk, a daughter is in my future?

lots of dreams... very scattered- busy bodied environments.

in one dream i am meeting ingrid online but i have a computer virus, there's a program that installed itself on my computer- whenever i turn the computer on a little pop up box with a monkey keeps opening- when you try to close it, two or three more open in its place. if you just leave it, more appear on their own. i learn i am going to be without a computer for a while until i can fix it. i don't feel too worried about it, and know there's a way to turn the computer on and go into some kind of safe mode and possibly a way to restore the software to its default settings which might correct the issue.

in another dream i'm sleeping in the hallway floor by the front door to our house with a few people. there's two people standing on the other side of the door, they ring the doorbell but i am still sleepy and pretend i am asleep. they're standing there for a good 15-20 minutes before i, "wake up" and act surprised to see people standing there.

in another dream, probably the coolest of them all- i am a golden hawk soaring in a snowy storm. the feeling is majestic. i am this hawk and i am flying through a blizzard- until i get out of it and am now just soaring in a snowy mountainous region. i descend with my wings and flap some life into these beetles on the floor- i decide to leave them be, a couple of my feathers land on them and create motion. the beetles, if i remember, are brown and black and blend in with the dirt.

in yet another dream i am in a busy car dealership trying to sell two people a car. one person has no credit and their dad is military police. when i ask for contact info he just tells me to put, "MP" and the other person is jeff my old finance manager. the kid with no credit thinks he'll just keep giving the lenders large sums of money every other day and it'll be ok. i know it doesn't work like that but i try to humor him anyway. i go into the sales office and find my old HS crush lauren is the sales manager. she's being really nasty and has these women catering to her every whim- she's playing a video game while she has a line of sales people waiting for her to pencil their deals. before i go to see her i remember walking the lot and looking at a few of the cars- one is a new, white audi and it has these really magnificent screens all through out the dashboard. i needed to get their stock number so red head lauren can pencil my deals. as i'm waiting in the crammed office, jeff the finance manager appears. i jokingly pick on him to pick a stock number and tell him we're going to get him a car. lauren looks at me and looks at the papers ive set down on her desk. i explain to her the situation between the two potential buyers but as i'm doing so i begin to question why i'm even here. i don't want to be doing any of this. so, in the middle of the chaotic energy and crammed office space- i get up and leave. no explanation. i'm done here.

in the last dream that i can recall... i am again in a crowded environment, at something like a mall. i'm hungry and my friend is supposed to meet me. i'm inside a mcdonalds and the workers are extremely busy. one woman employee picks up some food that was promptly returned to the front, and throws it at another employee. she was showing him that this guy burnt some food(again) and was losing her patience. a young male comes up to me and ask what i want, i'm a bit in a daze wondering about my dream from prior and how i got here. i look at him and tell him i want some breakfast, but he says they no longer serve breakfast. so i leave this place remembering there's an i-hop next door. it isn't a typical sit down restaurant styled i-hop but more like a food court in a mall. there's two elderly black women. they are really sweet. and there's no lines. i am really enjoying the pause in the chaotic energy. the one woman gives me a small plate and says, "this is for eggs." so i tell her i'll take some eggs. she rings me in thinking thats all- but then i tell her i want some blackberry jam and blueberry pancakes. she thinks thats all but then looks at me and we all laugh because i ask her if i can get some bacon to go with it. she ask me, "is that all" in a joking manner. i tell them i was really hungry and the other black lady who wasn't ringing me up tells me- "you're alright, and you're going to have a daughter really soon."

my friend calls me asking where i'm at- i'm in my car ready to eat my food... i'm talking loudly into the phone because i'm back in a chaotic environment. he thinks he is being funny by talking loudly back mimicking me. i don't have the patience, i tell him "cool" and hang up on him. he eventually finds me and sees im eating all this breakfast. i tell him i was "hangry"- he apologizes realizing he was being a bit of an antagonist and not understanding just how busy bodied the environment was until he arrived. 

i woke up multiple times through out the night but decided to record after the 4th dream. there was more but that's all i can seem to remember.

nine tailed beast, arabic man named lilith

hard to recall. the spot in my back still hurts, it was difficult to sleep- im like a old man covered in aches and sores lol. i kept waking up through out the night. i do remember one portion of the dream, in the beginning- going up and down an elevator chute, and having tremendous power. by the end of it i was roaming freely and fiercely, able to transform into a nine tailed beast.

later i had a hypnagogic experience. what is strange about this is that it feels like its the second night to have been visited by this person, except i did not record it yesterday. so either i did not remember, or this familiar feeling is a part of the experience- where i think its the second time but its the first.

i am visited by an arabic man named lilith. he is writing to me, arabic script- but it is translated as it is narrated to me. i cant remember everything- just that i was called sweet eric and some reference to my job.

american ninja warrior, heart portals, other side?

dog duty.
as soon as i woke up, i threw myself out of bed to take care of the dogs.

trying to recall now...

i remember, an american ninja warrior style competition. it feels like everything i'm recalling is from the eyes of observational awareness... like i am somehow associated to the characters, but i am not viewing through the eyes of the characters. the more i think about it, the more i think this is how i dreamt last night.

there are two competitors, one is a younger asian man- and one is an overly swol tom cruise look alike. who, "i am" might be more related to the older competitor. although the obstacle is difficult for both challengers, the younger man is able to finish faster. but he doesn't win, he moved so fast- and in his over-eagerness fell into a trap near the last segment of the obstacle. whereas the older man, struggling, but able to complete the course- wins.

i am now at the top of this platform, holding a tv styled interview as the contestant winner with spokespeople down below. i can't really hear them, but i understand one of the commentators feels i won unfairly, or to say, that the younger competitor was clearly the more able-bodied winner. there are a few others with me in this, "collective awareness" like we're sitting together as energy who clearly disagree with the commentator. it's so obvious who won and who didn't that this guys remarks are seen as ludicrous.

suddenly... a different scene.

again i am viewing everything through an observational lens... but i feel an association with a few of the characters. the main character and the side characters. here, there is a group of young men being chased through out something like a museum. they are looking for an ancient relic. but this piece is not so easily found and the pressure from the chase is building up. there's a voice of an elder male coming through the aether, instructing the young man(the main character) that he does not need to find anything- that he can create what he's looking for. to feel it.

i feel it. in my chest, i am producing something from my heart- and the time/space field around me begins to distort... i place my hand out and a golden white wavering circle begins to form, no bigger than the size of my palm. there are occasional black specks flickering within this portal.

the young man, and his peers, are shocked and amazed. even though this is a very small circle, the energy is suggesting that he and his fellows dive into the portal to safety. not sure how they do this, or how they fit... but they go through the portal.

on the other side,

the feeling is celebratory. the young man created a, "heart piece" and there is an elder woman recommending different factions and what benefits they come with for him to choose. the young man does not pick any of the recommendations, but chooses one that involves more physicality and struggle.
on this side, the feeling is hazy... losing recall...

only that there are groups of people, the colours are shades of dark blue, light grays- these are shadows of people thronged about. a clamoring ambience...

i can't remember much more at this time.

scattered dreams and then... a rainbow serpent light around yogananda


the dream actually seems to be about my sister... we're sharing a space, and i notice she's put a few pieces of artwork up on the bathroom walls.

in another scene i am downstairs in the livingroom and she has a girlfriend over. they are making some kind of lasagna. this is to be her future roommate. she invites her friend into the livingroom and i'm asked to sit up. i offer her a spot on the couch, she is interested in what i'm doing. i'm just playing a puzzle game on the TV. i look at this girl and think she is really young. i ask her how old she is, she tells me she is 16. she is super young. but she is trying really hard to be older. she is wearing a short skirt and talking like she's an adult. she is also showing an interest in me.


another dream in the house and we're having to pick the male dog up because his hind legs aren't the best. it concerns people and there is a little commotion trying to move him and keep him still, trying to keep him calm as we lift him(70 lbs dalmatian) off the ground.
----

a random dream... i am remembering my old HS friend and crush Shelby. I'm in a car and it's drizzling outside... She pokes her head towards me from outside the car and we start kissing on the lips. They are soft, succulent kisses. I remember feeling a lot of emotion behind her kisses.  I don't want to stop.

......
And the coolest thing I dreamt of all night!
I am in the car, my Aunt is there- my Pappy(Grandpa) is in the back seat with me. My Dad and Sister are in the car too. My Aunt is telling a story, and surprisingly- my Pappy(who can't talk IRL) is talking perfectly fine. He tells us he had a rare experience with photos, my Aunt doesn't believe him- my Pappy says he brought the proof because he knew she'd doubt him. My Aunt says, "more photos! here we go"

And he pulls out these pictures that none of us have seen before. They are colorful. More colorful than the dreams themselves. I see a man in robes atop something like a mountain doing some kind of movement similar to tai chi. It isn't tai chi, but he's got his arms spread wide apart. But the FIRST thing I notice is the brilliant rainbow serpent aura moving around his body in a crescent shape. At first I thought the robes were white and I asked aloud, "Is that Gurunath?" But my Pappy shows me the picture and it's Yogananda. Once I realize it's Yogananda I see him in his typical orange robes and I shout, "That's Yogananda" in excitement!

We look at the picture behind it, and it's Anandamayi Ma! My Sister however, is more excited by the woman saint next to Anandamayi Ma. April calls her Sri Ma but I explain Sri Ma is Anandamayi Ma. She is trying to explain to me that the woman next to her is different and the one she is really drawn to. I look at the photo and Anandamayi Ma is standing next to another woman saint who looks young and more rebellious. My Sister is attracted to the, "strong and independent woman" attitude.

I am feeling so much intrigue and joy from these photos when suddenly, my Sisters alarm goes off right at 7AM and she runs down the stairs with her laptop in her hands of people screaming. She is watching one of her drama shows.

That's as deep as I get to go. Wake up...

i am out in the country, somewhere northwest.  the setting is winter. some scenes involve snow/rain.

first i am practicing my tackling, a relative is instructing me over the phone. i am usually an offensive player, but am learning how to be a better defensive tackler. he helps me by telling me to go lower when tackling another. this slight adjustment makes for a great success.

there is also a dream with a woman, but i can't remember it at all. i think we were dating... strange that i can kind of see the dream, but cant relay it here. it feels more like a type of business exchange in our being together. but there is a level of romance that is hard to explain.

later i am given back the motorcycle i was forced to sell. it is a happy reunion. i am worried i forgot how to operate it because it's been so long. but once i hop on it i remember everything. this is a really good feeling. the motorcycle is becoming a classic, or vintage.

now the bulk of dreaming that i can remember...

we shoot and kill a brown buffalo. it's snowy outside. we lay the carcass in the snow until we can get it processed. a passerby notices and asked if we just killed the buffalo? we say yes. i can't see who i'm with but the feeling is family. the man picks up the head of the buffalo and tries to imitate the noise it would make. he thinks its funny but i distinctly remember kind of chuckling and then realizing there were two more brown buffalo nearby mourning the loss of their friend. i told him, "oh shit- there's more buffalo behind you" and imply that he needs to stop and show some respect.

between this scene and the pickup truck that comes to take the carcass of the buffalo we had killed, i am walking to a farm where there is a pen full of black with a small patch of white on the top buffalo. i open the pen, they are all crammed resting and i gently instruct one of the girls to come out. these buffalo are domesticated compared to the one shot and killed. she is so lovely, no resistance from her whatsoever. i am walking her with me towards a home... on our walk she is showing me so much love and affection. i really start to develop a deep sympathy for her. i call her sally. sally is my new friend.

more on the pickup truck... the buffalo that was killed was loaded onto the back of the truck and taken to a processing center. they were going to make jerky. i remember taking a bite of this meat and it being really gamy. i was offended by the flavor but did not want to waste any of it.

now sally has arrived to the house with me and the family at the table is eating the buffalo we had killed. sally offers two pieces of her ribs to us. i am appalled. i tell her not to offer anything. but she insist. she gives us two strips of her flesh to eat. i took a bite and the flavor is so much better than the wild one. but, i feel completely awful in having eaten the flesh. i am really sad and am crying internally and hugging sally. i tell her and say aloud in the dream, "never again."

wake up.

There was a time we may have lived like this. But so much has changed between now and then. Although it has a bittersweet feeling we hopefully will never live through this again. ( above dream ).

Hi Steve.

Doing some digging... And I think this dream is showing me a level of sacrifice that I'm not quite familiar with.

I'm talking about the dreaming of the buffalo.

I read that dreaming of buffalo has to do with a visit from ones ancestors. And in the dream I felt a certain respect was owed to the slaid corpse. It was to be our sustenance after all. I also saw regret in my actions, and I think the buffalo- as a spirit guide, was blessing me with forgiveness.

i'm scoping out a future living space. i am forced to apply to this community building built within what seems to be a mall or some kind of high trafficked inner-city. the reason has to do with my income. i can only afford to pay $385 a month towards rent. when i tell the woman this, and that i am not financially independent, she says i qualify and am allowed to apply. she gets up to show me an example room. it's very small, and the toilet is next to the kitchen, and the bed is next to the toilet. everything is lined up next to each other. it is highly discouraging. i will likely not live somewhere where the toilet is in between the kitchen and bedroom. suddenly it starts flooding inside the model room. i ask her about that and apparently everything with this place is in need of repair. not only that but the designers were super lazy.

even though i'm deciding not to live here i seem to be hanging out, energetically speaking, around this area. i am viewing multiple rooms, the leasing agents interaction with one another, and the area outside the building. i am kind of sifting around as formless awareness. sometimes a body, sometimes not. at one point i'm back in another room where someone seems to be living. i occupy their body to get a feel for everything. i recognize the bed is entirely too small for me. and there seems to be no backyard. i instruct the body i'm occupying to show me the outside. he opens up a small window and there's a flooded pool outside. it's raining and there are palm tree's. at least there are some tree's. the pool is not manmade it's just the consequence of all the flooding. i look up and realize these units are all stacked on each other. vertical housing. at the very top there seems to be a community rest area that allows you to peer outside. again, none of it is appealing. it feels like a modern prison.

i am back with the leasing agents who are about to host a party. they need someone else to be there and to pretend to be this indian man. i decide to play along, and they have me wear these robes. there's all kinds of food being offered and i'm reminded the man i'm pretending to be is vegetarian. i ask them why they would present meat if we are vegetarian. either way, i stick to the non-meat options as myself and a small group of people are circling around a main table and discussing who knows what. the color of the robes are beige and black.

somewhere in between dream scenes i see arizona and feel like i really want to live there. i hear the mayor of some major city talk and she seems to be a proud conservative boasting about her gun laws. i get this feeling that i don't want to live in the city but i see these mountains among a beautiful orange, setting sun. i feel this completely safe feeling and have a desire to live here. this desire tells me everything will make sense and allow me to come into my own.

suddenly i am moving along a countryside where me and another fellow watch this beautiful horse trot by. it's a majestic young horse with some kind of custom leather helmet on his head. the color of the horse is black with creamy greys and whites. the fellow i'm with comments on its helmet(it because we weren't sure at first if guy or girl. i believe young male but the other man thinks at first it might be a female) and i explain to him the horse belongs to this lady who also has hippos and she uses the hides from her hippos to craft custom protective gear for the horses heads. we go to her barn to learn more.

there is a scene where i am inside the barn in a cramped space with others, all on our backs- one of the hippos comes up and turns into a giant black pig. i ask the woman if its ok that he's coming right up to me like this- and she assures me that he will not use his massive weight to crush me. i pet him like a dog and he is extremely happy and rest a bit of his weight against me, but he doesn't pin me down and he makes a conscious effort not to apply all his body weight on me.

i'm transitioning into a wakeful state and there are two scenes happening at once. in one i am a young man, not my self at all, instructed to shoot my father in the head. he is not my actual father. i have no clue who this man is. my personality is the same, but i am none of these characters. i take no qualm holding up this rifle and looking down the scope and shooting at this bald man in the distance. i lead my shot, its perfect. the gun goes off, it makes the noise, there's a kickback- only, nothing happens. the man in the distance keeps walking, doesn't even look up. never noticed. did i miss? i take aim and look at the bald headed man once more. now i'm just watching. wondering about him. i take another shot when he's sitting still. again, nothing happens. no one notices. i wonder if i missed again? now i'm just completely observing this man through a scope, the crosshairs are perfectly on him- but i decide not to shoot. i am just observing...

in another scene i am back in a barn with a bunch of people. the dream focuses on this girl. again we are all on our backs laying side by side in a cramped space against the earth. the girl has a boyfriend next to her. the scene focuses on the fact that her genitals are exposed, and the boyfriend is prodding her near the top of her genitalia. suddenly two or three more penises come into view and are all prodding her vagina. like a slow moving camera the view pans down and i realize i am the only one actually inside her vagina- not even her boyfriend. there isn't much thought or emotion here, that i can tell. like- why are all these penises up against her? none of that crosses my mind. instead the focus is on the girls pleasure, and her breathing. its labored and theres a weird ambience of pink happening in the atmosphere. she is in a form of ecstasy. i am the only one actually inside her, and the scene seems to focus on this with her body motion and her breathing. wake up.

i remember an old co-worker, jason, handing out extremely large steaks. they were like 18-20oz steaks. i was actually disgusted by the size and the quality of the meat. it was all we had to eat, i did not want to eat- i took a few bites then returned the food to jason. he and a few others seemed displeased that i would not eat the food they were offering. i tried, but at least jason seemed cordial about it.

i remember my friend matt, with me in the backyard. we were shooting a bow and arrow at a dummy tied to a post. at first we were messing around, trying to shoot over our heads, backwards. then we decided to take aim and focus. matts shot was arched but it went precisely into the dummies mouth. i tried to recreate matts shot except mine did not arch. it was straight and much faster. it went through the lips and the tip of the arrow came out the back of its neck.

this symbolism with the throat seems relevant to communication.

there was another weird symbol, i discover an android hiding in a shell of a human. once exposed the android is actually a white gooey substance, laying on the floor. he cant move without his host body, the feeling here is like i am looking at the sticky habits of my self. the desire is to remove this crap from my being.

lastly i am visiting brian, or he is visiting me. he sparks rage in me and both of our energy levels are rising to the point of violent outburst. there's a desire to fight, but i remove myself from the dreamscape entirely. i realize though my heart holds some care for him, i don't want to be around him.

wake up.

there's a baby crawling super fast chasing a cat. this baby is rather intelligent, has powers but seems to lack empathy. i try to catch the baby and stop him from chasing the cat by explaining to him that he is better off trying to lure the cat to him instead of constantly chasing something that is outrunning him. i suggest he set a trap, explaining he'll need something enticing to intrigue his prey. he is able to capture a rather large black rat, he mortally wounds the rat so its bleeding thinking that would entice the cat.

some dreams happen in between here like flashes. like i am at a carnival. there are a few people on a ride that would have otherwise made me sick if i joined them. the feeling is like i'm a flying serpent slithering up and down in the sky and going between worlds.

i come back to see this rat is barley breathing and laying there. its life was wasted and i feel awful. the baby is no where to be found. i realize i have to end its suffering, i take an axe and feel responsible chopping its head off.

i am missing some really important data here. at least, that's how it feels. the in between world sensations also feels like i have a God for a father, i am not his only child- there are many of us. i am one in a group near some powerful ocean. the ocean and the skies are dark and there are massive waves. massive tunneling waves. i remember large structures being swept away by the waves.

the energy and the emotions are surreal sky and water. the feeling of flying through the sky and the feeling of controlling massive ocean.

the last thing i seem to remember before waking up is rescuing multiple people in the sky who are needing help descending in the desired location. it is kind of like a hot air balloon- i am able to somehow redirect their craft with my hands and help them land safely to the desired spot, otherwise they'd go off in the wrong direction and spiral down too fast and crash and die.
i am repeating this action with a few people scattered about in the sky until, wake up...
Live each moment in wonder, as if God is standing there. He's always before you, in every thing and every moment. Truly th

here's one i can remember, despite having multiple dreams.

i am speaking to an emperor about inflation and the collapse of the economy. i am asking him questions, like what is still considered valuable when the economy crashes. i ask him about earth minerals. he says of course things like gold and silver. there's a point in this conversation where i'm coming to some realization and kind of imploring/negotiating with the emperor that we have a chance to re-define value in society as the economy crashes. he is in agreement with me, and i am asking him to start doing the work. i think... ?

that or, maybe, i feel he is saying if we do this we will still be rich as the economy crashes.

it's 3:20AM as i decide to write this. i woke up thinking it was more like, after 5. i had a hypnagogic experience at some point. i'm not sure when, because i also had the usual dream experience before and after.

i started to notice the sensation of zeroing in and expanding out blanket my body, synchronizing with my breath. i started singing a most beautiful mantra in my head. i didn't even know i could sing it in this manner. and the voice was so good, i am not sure if it was me. the voice in my mind started taking over everything. it felt as if it were actually being sung aloud.

ommm
lokahhhh samastah sukihno bhavantuuu ommmm
lokah samasta sukihno bhavantuuu
lokah samasta sukihno bavantu

as i was singing my awareness started to deepen and expand. and although i am typing in a linear fashion, from beginning to end- there was an added element to the experience. there was both a linear and nonlinear experience, there was this ability to perceive each thought, sensation and imagery like a stream. maybe, multiple timelines- multiple streams. as if i could dive in to any particular one while simultaneously having the awareness that these ideas, life, thought forms exist in their entirety in the present. typing it out will only serve justice for the linear portion of the experience. but i tried...

each note of the mantra was a striking effect upon my consciousness. this deepening came with an ever blossoming, ever increasing point of light. each note synchronizing with the deepening of my breath. the point of light was blossoming directly form the third eye area. i believe it started off as a kind of pale gold and white light. and as i was singing this mantra and in a most unique but beautiful way, suddenly a firm note ignited the light- the light took over my entire vision and flooded my body. it at that point was more white and pale pink.  then transitioned back to white/gold. it covered everything, even though i can feel it as if it were longer in duration, it all happened in an instant.

i never stop singing this mantra, but now my awareness has shifted from the hypnagogic experience and the singing to become aware of my father in the room next door. my mother as well, and my sister. i don't spend much time here. i just know they are here.

at the same time, i am in conversation with- someone. myself maybe. i am taking all these recent conversations i've had with friends online about ascension and thinking on my friend Steve.
i tell my self i think I would like to know what it means to experience this 5D Geoff is talking about. as if negotiating with my self, and a remembered part of Geoffs words, i say something like I have to move past 4D. I believe I am allowed so, and everything I've written up to this point implies it has happened(within this hypnagogic experience).

now i am experiencing the dream state, but as these streams. when i first tried typing this out, everything was erased. this is my second attempt to re-write and now my memory is fading. i am losing whatever dreams i just had. but, what i've tried typing about the linear and nonlinear reality was captured as best as i could retain. i could feel what i was seeing and it was as if each idea and impression exist in my peripherals yet the feeling was also as if i were going directly down these streams. They were both independent and whole. somewhere here i started to lose awareness of this space i was holding and got lost within a particular dream/stream before waking up. i believe that dream had robin williams in it, and was a continuation of this desire to experience additional dimensions. only, i was no longer at the energetic capacity to retain the information in the same manner. now i am dreaming in distinct linear, and linear only, fashion. still, the dream is quite adventurous and all the characters must be my self trying to communicate this desire to me played out in the dream.

it's a bit frustrating i can not remember anymore but i am happy i was able to capture some information and present it here. the experience was beautiful- even this negotiating/conversation with whomever/self was so real and surreal. the level of clarity in the moment was liberating. the experience was crisp, and everything was experienced in folds yet wholly linear as well.

well, i work today and ought to go back to sleep. it's nearing 4AM. i didn't want to just let this experience go. i am grateful for whoever/whatever would allow me this opportunity...

i didn't share yesterdays dream but i had a visitor. it was an unpleasant one in that there was a lot of fear inside me. yesterday the dream felt so real-
well tonight (it's 2:25am) i woke up to a similar vibration and so i'm going to share both dreams. not all- just the parts that seem connected..

yesterdays:

a visitor, Strong hypnagogia

I wake up from a dream,

In the dream- I am at home with my Mom. It's just her and I in the house(which is true to life on this night). I am downstairs and realize there's a shadowy presence up against the glass door at the front of my house. He's peering in. I feel a strong rush of fear as he's trying to come inside the house. I slam my hand against the glass, "NOOOOOOOOOOOO" is what I yell really loudly, which causes the presence to run off and disappear. My mom asked who was it, I tell her- "some kid!" I wake up.

I think the shadowy presence was a visitor, even if a child, from a different world. (It could be this world, but a world I am not used to).

For the life of me I can't fall back asleep. I believe this might be in part because I had green tea around 4PM. I am both sensitive and addicted to caffeine and am starting to feel a shift in my attitude towards it.

Anyways... I finally am able to sleep but I am too scared to because the PULL in the hypnagogic experience is TOO STRONG. It feels forced, I can tell- immediately- there is a presence waiting for me. There is a surreal noise in my ear, and I keep myself from being taken. I don't want to go with this presence. This could be my own fear- but the feeling of this in between state was not so subtle and more like slamming me down as energy was rising to meet for an OBE.

------------------


And todays:

black site, black crocodile


it's 2:10AM. i woke up in a bit of a panic. that same, "hand on the glass" and shadowy visitor from yesterday has cropped up in my dreams again. except this time, instead of a child it's an extremely massive black crocodile splayed horizontally against my parents bedroom windows.

in the dream.

people are coming up to me and sympathizing with me. i haven't a clue what they're talking about. even my mom says she saw me in this film. i have no recollection of being in a film. so. we watch this film in my parents bedroom. it's a documentary of some kind, and the film isn't about me but about these strange reptile beings. i happen to be in the film as someone effected by the beings.

when my segment comes up it's like an interview style on 60 minutes, mixed in with some mock footage where these documentaries re-create scenes to help paint a picture for the audience- and strangely enough i'm singing a song, playing guitar, and even rapping a little bit about my transformation.

in this documentary- i am recalling my time at a military black site. whatever that means. i notice my head is shaved and i look a little different, but this is me. there is nothing pleasant about my recollection in this documentary, it is actually quite a disturbing tale/harrowing song. i am singing about my genes being transformed. it's about becoming the thing i have previously dreamed of subduing(the crocodile). i'm watching with my parents and am just blown away why i have no memory of being there making this film- even, wondering, how i came to be such a good singer and rapper. i don't remember any of this, and i don't remember any of my time at this alleged black site either.

the song goes into full detail of my transformation- these murky waters, the changes to my DNA, and the pain associated with everything.

as we are finishing the film i look up and out the window and i see a large hand/claws slapped against the windows then quickly retract. i jump back and yell, my heart is racing. my dad looks up and wonders what i'm freaked out about. as if there's nothing there. he opens his blinds to the remainder of his windows and there's a massive black crocodile pressed horizontally against the windows. i am having a full blown heart attack. it's come for me. i wake up in a state of panic.

edit: it was a similar fear, as well, towards the unwanted visitor from yesterday.
last night- before going to bed, i prayed to god that i would like the opportunity again to encounter whatever was happening and work through the fear. i prayed for healing. is this related ... ?

yesterday, with the black crocodile dream- i fell back asleep and was in a surreal land. i am going to share that dream before sharing tonights because i believe they are all connected. i wont share everything- but just the strange land:

and something i also don't think can be easily understood is that- during this dream, i am having additional dreams. i am basically dreaming two things at once, what i call multi-layered dreams. one layer will be, for instance, me at my house noticing a mosquito. while at the same time, i am dreaming of being at an airport and of people moving about.

so i am sharing yesterdays dream as it relates to the course of the last few nights- which i believe i had a visitor. i do think the black crocodile is a scary aspect of myself. i am being confronted with aspects of self, but at the same time, with the assistance of beings we do not ordinarily perceive. that is my belief.


curious to me that the specific words, "hope for tomorrow"
so starting jan 6th i was approached by a visitor. jan 7th i learn of a painful transformation at the genetic level, and am left with the words, "a hope for tomorrow"

and last night i dreamt of an alien experiment which was considered successful in many ways... was this, "the hope for tomorrow?"

it also is curious to me that we can have dreams carry on the next day. my friend casey claar has had survival dreams all month long, sometimes picking up right where she left off from the night before. it does seem that the more we become aware of our dreams, the more we can see how they relate and carry on into the next time we fall asleep.

i am always fascinated by what happens to the mind as we begin to go to sleep- always hoping to catch that slipping point of awareness to non-awareness and noticing things in the body as it happens. this is a hidden joy in my life.

so without further ado- last nights dream:

human alien hybrid experiment


i'm with some secret intelligence force(human). i'm dreaming as group mind. the perspective is from the small group of volunteers. we're willing experiments, attempting something like a transfer of consciousness into alien hybrid avatars. some aliens are offended because our hybrids contain original(ancestral) genetics of the offended. this isn't revealed until later. at first the focus is on the experiment. it's a daunting task. we're a limited crew of 3 or 4 inside a small underground base. we are having to die and be reborn. there is one female in the group- i see through her eyes and the others. we place ourselves in these cryogenic-like tubes. except, a orange liquid begins to fill. the crew of volunteers think the orange liquid is very unique looking. beautiful even. it is not yet revealed to us that this would kill us. the liquid fills everything in the tube essentially- we have to drown in order to proceed. once the realization dawns upon the female, she breaks free from the tube followed by the rest of the volunteers.

it takes multiple attempts before we get it just right. from the perspective of those conducting this experiment- patience is lost by those of higher rank. they start demanding and threatening. one man specifically, tells us of a similar experiment now being conducted on another group of volunteers in another room. he tells us whoever completes this mission first gets to go home. whoever doesn't... well. it's a threat.

i'm back in the eyes of the woman, and another character who reminds me of someone like harrison ford. we are determined to do this- as terrifying as the concept of dying/drowning is. i watch the harrison ford-look-a-like go into the tube and as liquid begins to fill he lets out a bubble and sticks his tongue out. he seems fearless. so we all proceed, and we all allow the liquid to take over everything.

from here, something interesting happens. like a creature jumps out on my back- and another with the other volunteers. the project/experiment is a success. we are now occupying the body and minds of alien forms. we are all different, yet we are able to communicate to each other in the aliens native tongue. we also realize we are able to communicate to each other without talking. there seems to be some emphasis and excitement about our ability to communicate underwater. like we can move about at great depths in the water unrestricted.

the dream begins to kind of slip into a more chaotic, less centrally focused dream. it's a new environment with streams of data. this is where i discover multiple ET beings aware of the project and some who are displeased that hybrids are inhabiting ancestral bodies. it also seems like there's a bunch of, "feet" moving across a mall or an airport. but its more like we're on a ship. it's a different place from where the experiments were originally conducted. this place feels, above ground. more like in the sky . that image of a bunch of feet walking across empty space is really dominating my mind. it's a busy bodied environment. there are many details lost as a consequence. i do think there is a love story of some sort that i am missing, and there is also a mission by a few humans who are not so successful in their transformations- an image of a few people wading in water, those same people attempting to get back home.
 

three bunnies, one is a personal favorite  :)

i have multiple *scenes* that i remember as distinct. but... i woke up and was on dog duty... so i only remember the details of one for the joy it brought me.

i was gifted three bunny rabbits. two were shy, they were gray and white. i placed carrots about to try and get them to feed. there was great tender care for their well being.

there is one(and i usually call pets in my dream Charlie. I think I called this one charlie too, but i have to say- I think this is my default and maybe i am remembering this detail wrong) he was a shaggy, long haired- white and brown baby bunny. he was so cute, so adorable, and always getting into mischief. always wanting to explore his boundaries. i felt a lot of love and joy for Charlie. i felt like he was mine. my friend, my sweet baby too.

(https://imgs.search.brave.com/4lSYZ9xcRvP3d_N1PLF3ueoIbuiRZWJCGluqKxD4Ekg/rs:fit:860:0:0/g:ce/aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cu/dGhlZWR1Y2F0ZWRy/YWJiaXQuY29tL2lt/YWdlcy9Ub25ueV9k/ZV9MYXNzb24uanBn)

Steve, I had a dream with you in it- you were married in the dream world:

i dream my friend steve pays me a visit up in pennsylvania. it's our first time meeting each other in person. he drove up in a sort of RV. my aunt is a bit nervous. i hug steve and he is very quiet observing everything. it's not at all what he thought. we're all in the backyard and i'm playing baseball with some of the cousins and steve's wife appears. she's an indian woman. my one cousin becomes very interested in her. steve becomes more lively now that his wife has arrived and he is excited for the opportunity to teach the children meditation. the reason my aunt is nervous is because there is an image of monks in red robes chanting, the entire dynamic challenges her religious views.

1/22
floating in the sky, mudras, giant orb, seeing friend in 7th grade- time travel?

i'm high in the sky levitating across, my body is in its upright position and i am doing different mudras. i am able to create a massive black orb. i ask someone what im supposed to do with it, that i haven't learned how to "catch" my orb. i hold it up to the sun, from this angel they look to be equal size- but of course, the sun is much larger. i am admiring the creation. i look down at the ground below me and i see these human/rat hybrids giving these people a hard time. i decide to descend the orb towards the agitators, it explodes into a gust of wind on impact- pushing the rat hybrids and the other people into opposite directions.

in another scene i am teaching a class how to drift on a basketball gym floor in their socks and we're advancing along in progression with some kind of game. i am with chase, my old buddy, and we notice a young sean in the crowd among the 7th graders. sean should be with us, our age(mid 30's) but there he is as a young 7th grader. i look at chase in bewilderment. have we traveled back in time? chase tells me to "keep moving along" which is uncharacteristic of him.

1/23
dark/heavy atmosphere, chase scene, baby eric, girl mentions Azazel

in the first portion of my dream everyone is of african american descent,
i am in a dimly lit, heavy atmosphere, lone part of a mall.
i am walking down a hall, and i am forced in the same direction as a woman in front of me. she is wearing a brown fuzzy winter hoody. she has black pants and those boots that seem popular among the girls. uggs? she thinks i'm following her and her energy is tensely scrunched up in her self. she keeps looking back and starts getting angry. she has a plastic straw wrapped in paper and tears off the bits of paper from the top, rolling it into a ball with her finger tips and pelts them back in my direction. she grunts as she does this. i don't know if i should be offended and say something or just leave her alone. i choose the latter.
as we round the corner the place becomes densely populated. the atmosphere is still rather heavy. there's a bunch of police officers off to my left. they are of low rank or entry level. some of these officers look like children. maybe young men in their early 20's. i think i am witnessing a police station, there's a congregation of officers while some are being dispatched to their proper station. i see one higher ranked official working a double as a security guard in this walmart styled facility. he has multiple firearms attached to his persons.
as i'm walking through the mall, a police officer is escorting a man in handcuffs off to my right. they are headed towards me, not away from me. as they get closer, the police officers face scrunches up with pure disdain and suddenly they're working in unison to attack me. the man in handcuffs is extremely swol wearing a muscle tee and the officer takes his hands off of him and they both bum rush me. the feeling is like they want to kill me. next thing i know a chase ensues and i am trying to flee this place. i am running through corridors and it feels like the energy behind the chase scene amplifies. what started as two adult men feels like maybe three or four. maybe even five.
i break through the mall and into more private sectors. there's a man who appears as some professor wearing glasses and thumbing through loose papers. i plead with him that i need to "get out of this place" recognizing the windows behind him leads to a parking garage. when i see this, it's a relief, and without waiting for the mans reply i break through the windows and go out into the parking garage. i rush down another narrow hall, and close this heavy door behind me. i lean up against these guard rails and use my weight to keep this giant lever in the locked position. the men on the other side of the door are trying to bust the door open. i keep it locked with all of my strength. they are giving it everything they have, i can feel the violent shocks of energy through my legs with each ramming attempt. this goes on for a solid few minutes before their efforts begin to wane- once i realize there's less attention on the door i make a run for it. it's night time outside but i am no longer in the parking garage- i managed to hop over some fence and am wondering how to get home. it feels as if i'm in an entirely different state with no clear understanding of where i'm at. all i know is i can't go back the way i came.

wake up.
i use the restroom and as i'm trying to fall back asleep i recognize the potential for an OBE, the creeping sensations one associates with sleep paralysis is present. having this fearful dream i opt in to turn on my side and ignore the pulling/over powering force and instead decide i will sleep more. a part of me questions whether i should have explored this opportunity- and what message is trying to be relayed from the first dream?

the next segment of dreams is more scattered like, with only seemingly random details. there's more information here, less sleeping time, and multiple scenes.

i believe in one scene i am at my house. everything is as it is and i am communicating with my childhood friend and neighbor sammy long distance. sammy and his family are korean. i seem to be communicating with him over the phone into late hours/early morning. i tell sammy that eventually i need to go, as we are nearing 3 or 4AM. as soon as i get off the phone someone rings our doorbell. i don't want to answer. i go to see who it could be at this time of the day without making myself visible and it's sammy's dad. my mom apparently got up to answer the door and we're all outside now. his dad seems drunk with joy. he looks younger too, he has more hair than i remember. he is trying to share some good news about a new job. that's all i seem to remember at this time.

in another scene two distinct things happens- a dream with back to back details(foreground) and a separate dream blended in the (background). the foreground: i am again at my house except this time it is day time.  there's a baby named eric. my dad is playing with the child. i am out there as well, playing and observing. eric is like my baby brother, around 5-6 years of age(i don't actually have a a baby brother and can only assume this is me as a child). he wants to play in this tree. so dad takes him to the tree out front. dad is grabbing eric by his shirt and raising him high up in the sky and low down to the ground, all while hanging from some branch. eric is laughing and enjoying all of it. dad lowers eric into my arms and i throw him back to dad. baby eric is climbing the tree on his own now- dad becomes more of a giant hand than a body. this hand again grabs eric by the shirt- the shirt is all bunched up in this fist and baby eric is thrown about. you would think it rather reckless but the kid is loving it.


in the background: scenes of the mall are again apparent. this time the people here are white or hispanic. i'm in a room where people are being submitted to the police. not before this we're removing these tatoos off these kids in a private room. i am just observing everything. "we" are using "microrazors" to remove gang affiliations from our people. it's a painful process, especially since some of these kids are completely covered in tattoos which are of an incriminating nature. one kid, with a shaved head, is convincing the other it's not so bad. i look where the tattoos used to be and the person removing them has turned the removal process into an art. there's blacked out ink and hallowed skin creating depth and shadow. there's new symbols over the old, things like thin branched out lightning bolts. some skulls are left on one of the kids. all that's left in my memory are these razorblades hanging on string and the idea that they're being used to shave off skin.

in the foreground: somewhere here, after playing with baby eric- there's a transition towards the neighbors house. i remember me, as the adult observer, navigating over some invisible line shifting towards the neighbor. in order to do this i am having to carefully jump across the lawn which is covered in dog poop. i am trying my darndest to avoid the poop but by my own momentum and the sheer amount of it, i end up at the very end sinking the ball of my foot into some. oh yeah, i am barefoot in the yard. so i'm scraping it off a nearby rock and using the grass to rub dry.

the neighbor is a white woman with blonde hair. she works for popeyes chicken. she thinks i'm her nemesis. i'm not, but she has this competitive nature in her and she installs me as some rival figure in her mind.

while this is happening there's a few people, my self included, rushed up to the side of my house. i'm pointing out to dad there's a leak. what should be covered is exposed on the bottom corner- there's really intense water pressure shooting off the side. dad tries to touch it and it stings his hand because of how intense the pressure is from the water coming out. i remember an image of him, or myself, touching a brick and suddenly more cracks start to spread through the house. we're told to be careful, and this is something we need to repair.

back towards the woman who works for popeyes. she is very artistic and creative. she has come up with a new design for storing fried chicken to-go. it's a dark green microwavable, plastic air sealed bag shaped like an entire fried chicken. it has a spot for the breast, the legs- and resting underneath it are mashed potatoes and a flaky biscuit. in my mind i'm thinking the neighbors will love having this- but i also question why so many people love fast food when i have healthier options for them? my sister is with me and i tell my sister, "i don't really like the fried food but i'm tempted to try the gravy with the biscuit."

the focus has shifted towards the woman who produced this new to-go dark green baggy. there's a word given to me here that feels strange and important. now that i'm awake recording, i believe this word was given to me as a clue.
the girl who works for popeyes is now chronicling her dreams and keeping a journal. she is telling a story about a man who moved into her work place- even though they're both popeyes workers she says they are both more artistic in nature and she is falling in love. the word she uses to describe his eyes is what felt important... she calls them, "Azazel Blue" eyes.

so much energy is put on the word azazel that I wake up.
end log... 

Azazels Eyes, continued?

I wanted to hop on and record, even though it's only 3:35AM...

Something really nice happened in meditation last night before going to bed-
I briefly heard and felt the sounds of whales. With closed eyes it felt like I was a whale communicating to other whales. I felt the depths of the ocean and the longing of sound pushed out from my Being. It was brief, but it was quite magical.

I am practicing no electronics 30 minutes before bed, and also increasing my meditation routine.

The dream I just woke up from- again had to do with "Blue Eyes" Is this Azazel Blue?
I dreamt I was at work with my coworker Ramona. We were a little busy- I was helping someone who wanted to offer me a job in private. He never got around to fully explaining the job because Ramona came in. Later I noticed a litter box needed cleaned, it belonged to a cat. Ramona said the cat might be dead- apparently Sharon(the owner) left us in charge of cleaning the litter box. Our responsibilities are considered a shared effort. After she suggest it might be dead, an absolutely beautiful blue and gray cat comes out from her house. She hasn't eaten in a while, is a little skinny.

I am speaking so sweetly to her and encouraging her to come out from around the door. I am knelt down and have my hands by the door. She is obliging me and feels comfort in my voice. Her eyes are ICY BLUE. And her fur is also this majestic blue. Something about this blue...

Suddenly the cat shapeshifts into a beautiful girl with Raven black hair. She has fair/pale skin and she is talking to Ramona and I like a human. She is explaining that she hadn't eaten in a while. I am suddenly feeling encouraged to feed her and to clean her living area.

At the same time, another customer chimes in and pulls me away from my desire to be with this majestic Being.
I am obligated to help the customer, and hope Ramona completes the task of feeding our feline friend.

The customer wants me to try a "mango shot" she made because its "habanero level" is "100" She pulls me to the back. The mango shot is a chunky, pulpy drink. She takes a little in front of me. I follow suit and we share the same container. She is eager for my feedback. We are smiling because neither of us think it too hot. She tells me it's the best drac'un drink she's had in a while.

Wake up...

What's really nice is there is a beautiful thunder storm happening outside... I am really enjoying the sounds. Coinciding with my practice of meditation/no electronics- it has been raining for the last three days. It feels very healing and I got to enjoy sitting in the rain yesterday afternoon. = )

I am recording right away because this is the second night in a row the "Blue eyes" are mentioned. Yesterday was, "Azazel Blue"

I did not want to forget.

I have recently had a dream of a powerful fire god. There was such an in depth story behind him and a woman that I was emotionally drained and woke up a little depressed. Since then I have not had many dreams. Instead, I have been dreaming of sleeping. Last night I was dreaming of laying on bleachers and a man was trying to wake me up. But I was so tired I was choosing to sleep and rest.

Curiously, I woke up near 3AM to physical knocking on the bedroom door. No one was there, that I could see- but the knocking was gentle and nonthreatening.

spider hybrid, OBE, alex jones

i dream that i am a human spider. some sort of hybrid, i have wrapped my self in silk like a cocoon. at the same time, a separate layer of dreaming, i am in the shower. as i'm standing there i'm receiving the visuals of this deeper layer. like i am discovering some aspect of my self. it is connected to the spider. there's something kind of caked on my skin that i'm peeling off in the shower. i want to say it's a blue/purple plaster like material. there is a profound emotion dominating the energetic field.

later i have an OBE. the visuals behind closed eyes were incredible. and suddenly the ringing comes in fast in my left ear. the body is shutting down too fast. but i am still awake. i raise my arms up and realize i've raised my astral hands out of my body. but i'm still laying in bed. it's a struggle to lift my whole self out from my body. but i do manage to roll forward. i'm a little uncertain whether or not i'm actually awake and now sitting up in my bed or if i've pulled my astral form up. i realize it's the latter as i gently come to a standing position in my room. my body feels incredibly light and i'm gently bobbing- near hovering off the ground. i propel myself towards my bedroom door. usually i can phase my body through the door no problem. that seems to be what i always do once i'm in the space. it's kind of like a mental habit. "roll out of body, phase through the door, glide down the stairs." except this time, i push my head up against the door and am stuck. i can't phase through the door. and suddenly there is a heavy sensation as i am standing upright, like i am going back in time. the entire environment is shifting backwards- like i am semi-hovering at a standstill but the entire room is pulling itself behind me. now there's a zeroing in on my body and i begin to see it like a reflection. as the energy is moving i start to see some kind of pointed leather on my shoulders. i realize i am wearing dark brown leather armor. it kind of reminds me of something a roman soldier would wear. end of OBE.

later i dream i am being wrongly accused by others. the lie is too great to convince anyone of any actual innocence. and i say things that at a surface level, or if believing the lie, only strengthen the lie and keep people separate from me. suddenly i'm in a remote wooded area. like a forest, i am being led up a stone gravel path. its a man-made path that kind of blends in with the surrounding nature. we're going uphill to his private estate. as we get there we are climbing through secret areas he is showing me. i stop the tour to realize i am staring at the most beautiful pink parrots. its a mom and its baby. the mama parrot has its body over the little one. they aren't like a bright pink but more like a gray and pale purple and pink. absolutely stunning, and i look at alex and wonder if he see's it. i think in the dream of sharing its significance to him and his family. i also think he must not consider it a big deal because of the altitude we are at, that this might be a normal sighting for him. this estate feels more like a segmented captains ship and he has me popping me head up in various places and looking out. by the end of the dream his wife and little girl come. he attends to them as i am pulling my head out of the last narrow space he showed me. i had asked him to take me all the way to the top and he obliged, though a bit reluctant when we got to the very, very top. now his daughter is here and she is coloring with crayons and the mother is wondering about my presence. i believe its time to go.

wake up...

last night i had another out of body experience.

i went into my backyard and there was something that did not belong. a dalmatian puppy on a bench. i excitedly said hello, and the experience was over.

before this i had downloaded dr. steve greers CE5 app and tried establishing communication with ETs. i believe this was a successful experience.

the presence in my backyard was reminiscent of an OBE i had in 2022. and i believe i have already been given answers to what i'm being shown. i also found this bit on dalmatians tonight and it is in line with where i find my self presently:

Excerpt taken from, https://quornesha.com/2016/04/02/dalmation-canis-lupus-familiaris-symbolic-meaning-9764/
"It is important to be who you are within always in your dealings and actions. Be yourself also, in your mistakes. You are getting ready to make moves in order to build a home life you can literally call your own. This is indicating that you will move into a more independent phase of your life in regards to the home sector. You will be pleased and the pressure you were once feeling will subside. If you have set plans into motion or you are working on your career at present this is assuring that you will make a move in this regard. Know that the changes to come about are for you to ‘build’ or start a home and family life of your own.

You are getting prepared and are ready to begin a generation from your own background.

You are being welcomed to new levels and spiritual atmospheres. It is time. Now is the time.

Black and White Dalmatian: The Yin and Yang energy being harmonized, and harmony expressed in career and home life.
Namaste,

Quornesha S. Lemon "

i am enjoying the connections made in meditation more and more.