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Dharma and Science => Psychology => Topic started by: Steve Hydonus on Nov 24, 2020 07:41 pm

Title: Irritations
Post by: Steve Hydonus on Nov 24, 2020 07:41 pm
How to deal with minor irritations in ourselves and others? I think we have to be gentle with the irritations of others. Otherwise our behavior-most probably-will  be met by heightened irritations and resistance. We often have difficulties just dealing with our own irritations. Thus the need for introspection and meditation while avoiding foods and behaviors            (meat, heavy spice, excessive alcohol usage or indulgence in the senses ) that can cause irritability. Instead of finding possible cooperation we may be met with someone doubling down on us. This is an interesting concept>>> double down; strengthen one's commitment to a particular strategy or course of action, typically one that is potentially risky. It can lead to the breaking down of relationships and possible undesirable decisive outcomes.

I have found, that quite often, if you do not react and are aware of the dynamics playing out.... often people will recognize their own personal defects themselves and will apologize without encouragement or expectation on our part. If things get too challenging it is best to find a way to allow space between us with others. That not always being possible it may also be important to look at ourselves more carefully/critically and find out why we attract such people and situations in our lives.

We also may have good outcomes from minor irritations because it allows us to express challenges in a relationship in a constructive way. However doubling down can often be risky and it may be better to find a mutually agreeable stance if at all possible until understanding develops.