Spiritual Portal

Please let me know what the stars say about this one, and my intense, fleeting relationship with her.

🙏🏻

February 14, 1985 2:11 AM

Need a place for birth if you have it...

Art.... it is very difficult to put together much of an accurate chart without a birth place.. It would determine the placement of the houses and sensitive points on the chart.

Houston, TX

Thanks 😊

Emily’s Birth chart and current transits.

Art this woman has a hard time separating her own ideas and thoughts from her ego... as seen in the Mercury Sun conjunction in the third house. She is currently going through some very challenging times in communication and they are added to her own difficulties in communication she came into this life with.

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Art’s present chart. Want you to know dear friend; it is never wise to get between two people and their relationship. Your dammed if you do dammed if you don’t. It’s a thankless task. Rather look at your chart spiritual brother.

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It was not easy to read Steve.  She said she many, many things... like she was thinking of leaving him for me, she called him "not mr. right, but mr. 'right now'"... Her fiance is much older and gives her financial security, but he does not connect with her like I did on every other level.

Basically, because of her troubled childhood, her fear guides her to choose the basic security he offers, over the profound soul-connection her and I shared.  I did my best, and I wish her the best. 

Thank you Steve! 

We shared so many things in common, and experience love with each other unlike either of us had ever experienced with anyone (she said this as well).

Doesn't everyone have trouble separating their ideas and thoughts from their ego?  Isn't this the basic problem everyone faces?  Attachment to one's thoughts?

You are correct though.

Your comments about communication are interesting.  Like every girl I've ever fallen in love with, she's not the best at communicating (and I tend to communicate excessively)... yin&yang...

Do you see anything more specific, as to why her and I aren't right for each other?

A psychic told me she would cheat on me or leave me for someone with more money if she became my partner... which might be true, since this seems to be one of her patterns...

She has major psychological issues, she's spent years healing... she said she's 90-95% healed... but that last 5-10% seems to control her with fear... which guides her to be with a partner with a lot of money, who can support her therapists and self-healing...

I love her and hope she does fully heal and get all the things she wants... Even though I know what she had with me is much greater... with much more potential...

To understand others in relationships it is essential we first understand ourselves. You may find this information helpful below. This life is a schoolhouse for the spiritually retarded. That’s why you and I are attending this class together. But think of it this way; don’t you often get sentimental about your school days back when you were a kid or teen?

Mercury square or opposition Pluto

You are so perceptive and you dig so deep for answers that you can be your own worst enemy. As a result, you might find ulterior motives or dark intent where there is none, and your suspicious, provocative attitude can cause some problems in your personal life, particularly if it reaches the level of paranoia. Not many people enjoy being second-guessed all the time, yet that is something that you are inclined to do, and a tendency that should be kept in check in your dealings with others. However, your determination to get to the bottom of any matter, to rip away falsehoods and expose true motives, can be used for good if you employ it in your work, for example, which can involve investigation and research, psychology, or revealing and perhaps dark creative arts. You can be insatiably curious about all that is hidden, taboo, repressed, or secret. You have a great love of debate, but should be careful that you don’t overpower others with your strong opinions, attempting to “convert” them to your frame of mind, or treat regular debate or exchanges of opinion as battlegrounds. Many of you do learn to harness your intense mental energy and apply it productively. You are capable of very hard work and effort.

https://cafeastrology.com/natal/mercuryplutoaspects.html

Fisher king; you also have this configuration in your chart;


Sun Square Pluto TransitSun square Pluto natal has an unsettling effect on personal relationships because of your intense nature. Ego conflicts are likely because you like to be in control of situations. When you feel like you are not in control, your level of agitation rises which results in others feeling threatened. Most often you will have these battles for control with other powerful people and authority figures.

To achieve more harmony in relationships requires a major transformation in your behavior. But the incessant battles you experience are just the thing to force you to evolve to a higher level of consciousness. It is very difficult, but you can learn to let some things go, without having to probe and control and dominate.

Until this transformation to a more relaxed attitude, you must experience some crises or journeys into the underworld, the darker side of life. Fascinations or fear of the dark, death, or losing control are just some areas you may touch on. Living out secret taboos with your sex life, the occult or addiction may expose you to danger but will add to your life experience and promote the transformation.

Sacrificing you need to control others and situations can be a rebirth, and resurrection from the depths of pain and suffering is an attribute of hard Sun-Pluto aspects. But you need not sacrifice success in life. You can channel your intensity into determination and hard work. Being ambitious while remaining less concerned with the competition, will actually lead to a position of power and authority, the very thing that causes problems in the beginning.

Both the Sun and Mercury are square your natal Pluto and they both point to the field of relationships where all this has been working out for this life and before. Relationships both at home and in the world. In the last few years this has become much clearer and the awareness as a result has led to tremendous spiritual discipline and recognition through relationships.

 lol

Wow

Excellent reading Steve!

So much in there... I may come back and respond to more of the points you make.


Broadly... yeah, I never expected to be with a woman in an "open relationship", its way against my personal values... but Emily was a soul mate, like none I'd ever experienced, and it didn't feel like there was much choice involved for either of us..  However, I can't be "patient" about being treated unfairly, as some Twin Flame's "side dude" to her sugar daddy...  I broke up with her twice, she broke up with me twice, all in the span of a month or two...  and yet, I feel for both of us, it was the most we'd ever been in love.. the energetic exchange between us, was like nothing I'd ever imagined...  she said "people would kill for what we had", and she's right... But that's all gone now... and I can accept her choice to be with the security over Spiritual growth and ecstatic inspiration and being in love with a soul mate... it's practical, even if it's incredibly unromantic...

I wish you could tell me astrologically, exactly why her and I weren't meant to stay together... despite the insane number of synchronicities, and everything else I mentioned...

I understand your point though... the answers, from my perspective, may be in my own chart... 

Do you see anything else in her chart to explain her behavior?  her fear based choices (if that's a fair way to put it... it's certainly only partially true)?

Yea recently I obtained my diploma,that is on my wall, for passing diaper school in spiritual management. I would like too keep it up to date if possible. ( One shouldn’t be to confident about such accomplishments.)


Slow by slow
Surer and surer

i hope you don't mind my saying something as i am inclined to share. we don't always understand why we experience synchronicities with people, especially those we have an affinity towards and who do not reciprocate the romantic feelings we ourselves are moved by. you want to know, astrologically, why you aren't together? no. you said it yourself, a line has been drawn. so, why try to force a situation that does not stand on mutual ground? it's not that you two haven't shared physically or emotionally but, when it came down to it, neither person was willing to have it "their way." who knows, it might change. the nature of darkness is that, without the light, it will remain a mystery. you speak of this other person(her decided partner) like you know him. you don't. you can't own any other persons experience but your own. these choice words you're using to justify the outcome of this experience might be your reality but it might not be the truth.

i am also wanting to share with you that i met a girl recently at my work who is near polar opposite to me and with whom i had quickly developed an attraction towards. she was physically, mentally and spiritually attractive. yet, it played out that it was not in my favor to pursue. during our time together, i had very intense dreams and peculiar phenomena happen that made me think there was something more to our connection. there really is but, because i wanted to have her in my own way, i quickly burned away a special friendship. we shared the numbers 888 together, i found her fathers silver amulet while meditating, i was able to access a meeting place she shared with her ex boyfriend in my dreams... in that very dream our bodies disappeared, all that was left was golden light, orange and yellow leaves, a body of water, the feeling of autumn and the most peaceful feeling i've ever felt. when i tried to share it with her, she didn't want to hear any of it. one day we were both sick at the same time, that night i had very intense dreams about her... about past lives... i even saw jessicas face in her ??? the dream ended with the symbol of a vibrating butterfly with white and blue pastel streaks of light emanating out of its wings and me asking her to remember our connection.
instead a friend moved in on her during all of these moments and at the time my hands were cuffed because of a work place predicament that made me believe my livelihood would be at stake if i tried anything... yet when it happened, i ended up acting on emotion which propelled our separation and my own temporary madness.

in time things will reveal themselves, my advice is to not get hung up on the why it hasn't happened the way you wanted it but to be grateful for where you are and for these very revealing moments of introspection. it's why i can appreciate your reply to me under my seeing jessica in my dreams thread. see, these experiences we have are real... though we might not have the answers, god may reveal them at a later time. in this way, i am feeling blessed for all those who've entered my life and think it might be a blessing i'm not with the people i once desired. steve makes me think i'm being protected in this way. . .

cheers!

Beautifully put Eric!  Thank you for sharing this.  All of it.  Thank you for sharing your experience and your perspective

I agree with you on all of this.

❤️ ❤️ ❤️

It is natural to want to understand the deep experiences we have had in ourselves and with others in our life. Especially if the soul has developed enough to realize that this life is a schoolhouse that we are trying to get our diploma for so we aren’t forced to come back here again.

Emily is a deep person herself Art and it can be seen in your experiences with her and her birth chart as well. However there are also some major impediments to your seeing her soon. She has some deep issues from the past and past karma that need working out. Unfortunately for us we cannot speed these psychological syndromes up for their resolution. But on another level it leads to much inner work on ourselves - so what may seem frustrating to us may end up having a silver lining. I to have witnessed many frustrating experiences with people who have had issues in their lives that were unresolvable from my help in the situation. In fact my ‘help’ often would only enable the situation to continue the dependence and difficulty for the other person. At times in life we must come to the awareness that everyone goes on at their own speed in this great spiritual unfoldment. Just as other souls have speeded ahead on us so we often ‘see’ things quicker than others in our evolution.

You did ask if I saw anything astrologically that shows some of this and I have. However first I want to say this; When I look at someone else’s life astrologically/intuitively it by no means absolves me of some of the same difficulties in my own life. It is probably good to remember that many psychiatrists and psychologists choose their occupations for that very reason; they either have experienced similar problems in their own lives or are a psychological magnet for mentally ill human beings—which is a result of their own complicated karma and dharma for their current life.

Having said that... both of the two of you have (Freudian slip) have certain compulsive and obsessive emotional issues you are working out this life. Although because they are different issues you and her are currently working them out in different contexts and environments. I also want to remind you that you said this to me; “Doesn't everyone have trouble separating their ideas and thoughts from their ego?  Isn't this the basic problem everyone faces?  Attachment to one's thoughts?” Of course this is true, although some people have more difficulties in certain departments of life that are often replayed until we get it right so to speak. It is like a constant reminder  that we face at seemingly every turn.  If we continue making challenging situations for ourselves because of our actions over more than one life, it shows up as a stronger presence in an astrological chart.
In your chart it shows up in having a subjective and very personal view of relationships that is very difficult to look at objectively. In hers she has had very difficult communication issues and difficulties with authority figures and male model roles in her past. In both cases the emotional turmoil and anxiety relating to these issues has made it very difficult to look at it as say in a witnessing type perspective..... which is part of what we gain from meditation.

Very accurate and insightful Steve

🙏❤️☮️

Really I’m just interested in you and appreciate your talents and presence so attempt to tune in.

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Her chart is literally a mirror to my chart...

Is that fair to say Steve?

That is a bundle on the opposite side as mine